2010.07.25 01:00 - The Train effect

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    Moon Fargis: greetings Ewan
    Yakuzza Lethecus: good morning
    Moon Fargis: morning yaku
    Yakuzza Lethecus: mein lieblingslöwe :)
    Moon Fargis: me
    Moon Fargis: *mews*
    Moon Fargis: :)
    Yakuzza Lethecus wonders where stargate is
    Moon Fargis: well she feels unwelcome here
    Yakuzza Lethecus: arg :(
    Moon Fargis: hmhmhmm
    Moon Fargis: morning QT
    Qt Core: hi all!
    Yakuzza Lethecus: Buongiorno, come stai?
    Qt Core: bene, grazie. Tu ?
    Yakuzza Lethecus: molto bene, grazie
    Moon Fargis: morning darren
    Darren Islar: morning everyone :)
    Yakuzza Lethecus: good morning darren :)
    Qt Core: (i feel quite guylty about several people here knowing some italian and while i can only use italian and english
    Qt Core: )
    Qt Core: hi Darren
    Yakuzza Lethecus: ah, google translates fakes wonder :)
    Moon Fargis: :)
    Qt Core: ;-)
    Moon Fargis: so hows everyone this morning ?
    Darren Islar: besides my yawning :)
    Yakuzza Lethecus: i am a bit excited of me trip to cologne later, to meet pema
    Yakuzza Lethecus: of my
    Moon Fargis: :)
    Darren Islar: okay :)
    Darren Islar: yes he was going to have dinner with a few of you
    Yakuzza Lethecus: and wonder if that doesn´t kill my morning in doing other things because i can´t disconnect myself from that thought
    Qt Core: quite good as temps are down a little
    Darren Islar: few of us, I should say
    Yakuzza Lethecus: yeah, pema,bertram,lia and i will be there
    Yakuzza Lethecus: we are all in a 100km circle around cologne
    Darren Islar: ah......
    Qt Core: the europe pab's hub ;-)
    Darren Islar: sounds great to have a meeting like that
    Darren Islar: :)
    Moon Fargis: and to have money for it :))
    Yakuzza Lethecus: at least it´s in europe
    Darren Islar: especially that :)
    Darren Islar: Cologne sounds French?
    Yakuzza Lethecus: Köln
    Darren Islar: ah
    Darren Islar: not so far from where I live :)
    Yakuzza Lethecus: au de cologne is a parfum
    Yakuzza Lethecus: hehe, get into the train an just appear
    Yakuzza Lethecus: fay is also comming
    Yakuzza Lethecus: berts former girlfriend
    Darren Islar: former?
    Moon Fargis: yesterday itryd that
    Moon Fargis: getting into a train
    Moon Fargis: and drive to essen
    Moon Fargis: wich is 300 km away
    Yakuzza Lethecus: what happened ?
    Moon Fargis: after teh frist 1h 30 minutes of the 5 hour tip, i arrived at the first change station
    Moon Fargis: where i had 4 minutes to get into another one
    Moon Fargis: wich wouldve worked
    Moon Fargis: if the connection train wouldnt be away already for 10 minutes because he went off 10 minutes earlier
    Yakuzza Lethecus: earlier
    Yakuzza Lethecus: didn´t know that´s even allowed
    Darren Islar: ohh...... those things really sucks
    Darren Islar: suck
    Yakuzza Lethecus: special thing because of the loveparade ?
    Moon Fargis: so the next train whouldve go in 2 hours
    Yakuzza Lethecus: tragic what happened there
    Moon Fargis: so i decided to drive back
    Darren Islar: right
    Moon Fargis: and never use train again :)
    Yakuzza Lethecus: did you intend to go to the loveparade ?
    Moon Fargis: ah no
    Darren Islar: that could be Yaku
    Yakuzza Lethecus: i don´t want to use my car to get to cologne
    Yakuzza Lethecus: i hate citytraffic
    Moon Fargis: to a computer show
    Yakuzza Lethecus: and then there is no free parkingspace either
    Darren Islar: I hope you at least get your money back
    Moon Fargis: ah i didnt payd :) on of my friends wo traveled with me payed for the ticket
    Qt Core: i live less than 5 km from Milan city limits and i went there by car less than 10 times in my life, got some shock the firsdt time i did it ;-)
    Darren Islar: :)
    Moon Fargis: well im glad i didnt went to the love parade
    Darren Islar: me too
    Qt Core: it was less than a year i cot my driving licence and there was a public transport strike so everyone was there with its car, a nightmare
    Yakuzza Lethecus: i have a car with liquified petroleum gas so driving is relativly cheap, but i really mind citystress
    Darren Islar: is it near the station where you are going to meet?
    Yakuzza Lethecus: yes, the hotel is close
    Darren Islar: ok
    Yakuzza Lethecus: the marriot
    Yakuzza Lethecus: i rarely travel at all so it´s exciting for me, usually i don´t see a point
    Darren Islar: well, from here there is a direct train to Köln, but it would take me a tremendous effort
    Yakuzza Lethecus: just come :)
    Darren Islar: with my thoughts :)
    Yakuzza Lethecus: kk :)
    Yakuzza Lethecus: my problem was initially that i don´t have a train back, but bert offered me to stay at his place
    Yakuzza Lethecus: which was really kind
    Darren Islar: oh, that's great
    Yakuzza Lethecus: where i live we haven´t got good public transportation
    Yakuzza Lethecus: hey cal
    Darren Islar: hi Cal :)
    Darren Islar: that sucks too
    Yakuzza Lethecus: and i hate the fact that the weekendticket´s only work for a single day
    Qt Core: hi Cal
    Moon Fargis: morning cal
    Yakuzza Lethecus: so i will have to pay 50 euro only to get there and back
    Moon Fargis: yaku: and not refundable
    Moon Fargis: like ours was
    Calvino Rabeni: Hello, everyone :)
    Darren Islar: hi Cal :)
    Yakuzza Lethecus: yeah, it´s great when you have friends because you can take 5 ppl with you
    Yakuzza Lethecus: but travelling alone sucks :(
    Yakuzza Lethecus: from the monetary aspect
    Qt Core: that's what book are for ;-)
    Qt Core: ohh
    Darren Islar: Moon, you still need to claim the session
    Moon Fargis: ah yo
    Moon Fargis: (brb phone)
    Darren Islar: (brb coffee)
    Darren Islar: b
    Moon Fargis: re
    Moon Fargis: :)
    Darren Islar: Moon is writing a book :)
    Moon Fargis: hmm a week ago i went trought SL drama again, about ap eron that gives meditation sessions in sl and this hated another person, becasue they where together and divorced again not in "peace", and after this ex person started aso won meditation sessions al break loose
    Moon Fargis: by all my effords i couldnt get that one person with the hate back to sanity
    Moon Fargis: it makes me really sad seing such people eating up themself
    Qt Core: they come to sl toghrther before divorcing so they go to the same places ?
    Moon Fargis: ah no they met in sl
    Moon Fargis: and where together
    Qt Core: almost the same (if not worse)
    Moon Fargis: ofcourse its a she and a he, so she is the one with the huge hate and he is the one who still loves and forgives mostly anything bad coming from her
    Moon Fargis: i asked her if she really thinks to be a buddhist
    Moon Fargis: but the didnt answered just accused me of things
    Moon Fargis: but i think she knows the answer
    Darren Islar: well even buddhist can get angry, but if you get stuck to it, there is something off
    Moon Fargis: well sure but that was pure hate and rage, no sence of clear mind all the weeks
    Qt Core: well, one can even be a bad buddhist, you know before being enlohted ;-)
    Calvino Rabeni: having ignorance is innocent - being committed to keeping it is not, it seems to me
    Qt Core: enlighted
    Darren Islar: pure hate is awful, there is no awareness in that and hate has a way of continuing itself
    Moon Fargis: its the fact that she lets herself drive so badly affected and attached to her emotions
    Moon Fargis: even reminding her many times of her own teachings she says in her meditations as prayer
    Darren Islar: if I understand you right this happened more then once
    Qt Core: do what i say, not what i do
    Darren Islar: ?
    Moon Fargis: yes all the time when i spoke with her
    Yakuzza Lethecus: the end in being a buddist is to be ,,no self" isn´t it but being a buddist doesn´t mean to be enlightened only the grasp for these mostive state of mind drives us into that direction ?
    Darren Islar: Then you indeed start to wonder what the word Buddhist means to her
    Moon Fargis: as on of the first intents of being a buddhist is to live WITH emotions, and not trhought them
    Moon Fargis: sure there are exceptions but good ones
    Moon Fargis: where people tryto live trhought joy moments
    Moon Fargis: well it ended anyway that she cancelled friendship with me cus i didnt agree that her ex is a a so badass man as shesays cus i know him now verry well
    Qt Core: in most online "things" i always thought that contacts would be much better than friends, less emotionally loaded
    Moon Fargis: maybe in the first month of being online :)
    Moon Fargis: but as soon one adapts it to his RL, wich he mostly does already while sitting infront of the computer, it affects the same
    Qt Core: even after more than a decade ;-)
    Darren Islar: you can choose to keep o
    Darren Islar: people on a distance
    Darren Islar: but there is no learning in it
    Qt Core: yes, but you have (for example here in sl) to befriend people with which you have only business relations or are just your building teacher
    Darren Islar: as in rl
    Darren Islar: ah you mean get friends in including people in your list?
    Qt Core: in rl i can separate those, both in my mind and on lists
    Qt Core: yes, some drama come s from acceptring or not or removing friends
    Darren Islar: ah, yes
    Darren Islar: I need to say that I don't consider all the people on my friendslist to be real friends
    Qt Core: just a few week ago i gave quite a blunt response to someone that asked me repeatedly to add her as a friends on another site
    Calvino Rabeni: I agree with Darren's idea about learning in relatiionships
    Yakuzza Lethecus: actually i have a rough time with my friendship definiton, i tell new distant contacts often more then ppl whom are close to me
    Qt Core: mee too, but sometimes i'm not in "learning mood/mode" ;-)
    Moon Fargis: hehe
    Yakuzza Lethecus: so i have very fast the issue that i have the feeling to have found new friends i can talk to better then my ,,real friends"
    Qt Core: the key word here being distant i think
    Yakuzza Lethecus: exactly
    Moon Fargis: yes
    Qt Core: i call it "the train effect"
    Darren Islar: yes
    Darren Islar: (can't even type 'yes' any more :))
    Darren Islar: train effect?
    Qt Core: you go on a long train ride, you start to talk to a stranger
    Qt Core: you know you'll never meet him again
    Qt Core: so you feel more open to tell things
    Darren Islar: ah
    Moon Fargis: well
    Moon Fargis: in sl one meets again :)
    Yakuzza Lethecus: you don´t know his button´s, he knows that you don´t know his buttons
    Qt Core: but at the end of the trip you feel connected to him and want to meet him again
    Yakuzza Lethecus: so it´s much more comfortable because you can even step over the shield of someone in someway
    Qt Core: and in the end he know more about you than rl friends
    Yakuzza Lethecus: :)
    Yakuzza Lethecus: ups
    Moon Fargis: ;)
    Darren Islar: that is a real German 'oops'
    Darren Islar: In Dutch it would be 'oeps'
    Moon Fargis: hehehe
    Moon Fargis: ohh the time
    Yakuzza Lethecus: actually i also have that effect around here in some way, initially everything was even more natural but as more as i went here as more i feared about how ppl percieve me or that i could be unpolite because i know some specific details of ppl
    Moon Fargis: sadly my time is limited today to one hour so i have to retreat now, thx fro sharing :)
    Qt Core: in the beginning is the idea that if even the stranger will judge you his distant judgment would not impact your life, maybe he doesn't even know your name or address
    Yakuzza Lethecus: so i can´t fully let go like it felt initially
    Yakuzza Lethecus: but you can always make it into a metadiscussion like right now
    Darren Islar: bye Moon :)
    Yakuzza Lethecus: i don´t know many places in RL where you can do that
    Qt Core: bye Moon
    Yakuzza Lethecus: take care moon
    Yakuzza Lethecus: nice sunday
    Moon Fargis: ciao ^^
    Qt Core: exactly, Yaku
    Qt Core: there is some embarassment when you discover that the stranger isn't anymore a stranger
    Darren Islar: but I guess there is also the challenge
    Darren Islar: how do you relate to a group or to someone if you start to know each other
    Darren Islar: knowing everybody has his onw backpack full of items of the past
    Yakuzza Lethecus: nods
    Yakuzza Lethecus: i also need a shower now and prepare everything
    Yakuzza Lethecus: take care, good sunday to all of you
    Darren Islar: okay, have a good time tonight Yaku :)
    Qt Core: bye yaku and have some fun
    Darren Islar: he is always goe so fast
    Darren Islar: *gone
    Qt Core: there is often the danger of starting another topic and get stuck ;-)
    Darren Islar: sorry?
    Darren Islar is wondering what Ewan is doing there outside
    Qt Core: sayinh goodbye and then reading an interesting phrase and responding, so saying instead of leaving
    Darren Islar: ah yes
    Qt Core: me too, he is there since my arrival an hour ago
    Darren Islar: parking his avatar on a bit of a strange spot
    Qt Core: called away from his pc and a very long away timeout i think
    Darren Islar: can happen, but to him it happens a lot
    Darren Islar: never mind
    Qt Core: that's why he has a long timeout ;-)
    Darren Islar: :)
    Qt Core: time to go foe me
    Darren Islar: okay QT
    Qt Core: have a nice sunday
    Darren Islar: bye :)
    Qt Core: bye

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