2011.06.18 19:00 - Little Focussins

    Table of contents
    No headers

    The Guardian for this meeting was Pema Pera. The comments are by Pema Pera.

    Pema Pera: hi Eos!
    Eos Amaterasu: Hi Pema!
    Pema Pera: let's see, it's 11 pm for you, right?
    Pema Pera: Saturday evening?
    Eos Amaterasu: Yes
    Pema Pera: hi Storm!
    Pema Pera: 11 am for me
    Eos Amaterasu: Hi Storm
    Pema Pera: easy to sync!
    Pema Pera: and 8 pm for Storm?
    Storm Nordwind: Hi both
    Eos Amaterasu: yes, all I have to do is stand on my head
    Storm Nordwind: Correct
    Pema Pera: hehehe
    Pema Pera: I got up at 6 am, and forgot so far to eat something
    Pema Pera: suddenly noticed some grawling . . . .
    Eos Amaterasu: Not Bella
    Storm Nordwind looks around for a slice of breakfast something
    Pema Pera: :-)
    Pema Pera: hahaha
    Pema Pera: one of those floating biscuits would be more than enough for a single breakfast, methinks
    Storm Nordwind smiles and nods
    Storm Nordwind: Of course if you like sardines, Aphrodite has left some in the pool...
    Pema Pera: sashimi . . . .
    Pema Pera: Hi druth!
    druth Vlodovic: hi guys
    Storm Nordwind: Hi druth
    Eos Amaterasu: Hi druth

    I brought up the topic of holding on/back

    Pema Pera: This morning (your evening) I've been thinking a bit about holding on and holding back . . .
    Pema Pera: it's a good idea to not hold on to the past, on all time scales, from years to seconds
    Pema Pera: since that can easily lead to holding back in the present
    Pema Pera: and I went over a number of examples that came up spontaneously
    Pema Pera: in fact, most anything to do with normal thoughts and concepts . . . . which are always late
    Storm Nordwind: And holding on to the future?
    Pema Pera: may be similar: projections into the future of wishes based on the past?
    Storm Nordwind: Possibly. Hopes, expectations, things unfulfilled in the past maybe
    Eos Amaterasu: holding on to the present is also questionable
    druth Vlodovic: I'd guess "holding on to" equates with judging and weighing
    Pema Pera: yes, another form of holding back
    Pema Pera: (to Eos)
    Pema Pera: not being open, in that way, yes (to druth)
    Pema Pera: so many subtle ways in which I can find myself not being fully open, the more I look carefully . . . .
    Eos Amaterasu: we can meet in our mutual losing being able to be fully open
    Storm Nordwind: I suspect we make microjudgments in the present when, for example, we drive a car and decide which lane to be in. Not holding on to what we arrive at will remove flixibility in the next moment to microjudge anew - and may cause a collision!
    Hokon Cazalet: hiya =)
    Eos Amaterasu: Hi Hokon
    Pema Pera: hi Hokon!
    Storm Nordwind suspects he put an extra "not" in there!
    Hokon Cazalet: =)
    Aphrodite Macbain: Hi Pema! Hokon, Storm, druth, Eos.
    Pema Pera: yes, I was puzzled for a micromoment :-)
    Hokon Cazalet: hi aphrodite =)
    Aphrodite Macbain: How great to see you all
    Pema Pera: hi Aphrodite!
    Storm Nordwind: Hi Hokon, Aphrodite
    Pema Pera: (we were talking about not holding to -- and now we are no longer holding on to talking, it seems . . . .)
    Storm Nordwind: Hello Arch
    Pema Pera: hi Arch!
    Eos Amaterasu: the interesting thing is "not holding on" doesn't just apply to situations of not doing, but to doing, action, as well
    Eos Amaterasu: Hi arch
    druth Vlodovic: why be bound by expectations :)
    Aphrodite Macbain: I could hear the purr before I saw the Arch
    Pema Pera: the archer's purr . . .

    And here the title of this session was born:

    Eos Amaterasu: normal attention consists of lots of little focussins, in the milliseconds range
    Archmage Atlantis: Yes, well, I have another rl cat in my life
    Aphrodite Macbain: I would like to learn to let go of feelings
    Archmage Atlantis: His name is Chester
    Eos Amaterasu: (focussins are perceptual moccasins)
    Eos Amaterasu: Hi Chester
    Eos Amaterasu: Hi Aph
    Aphrodite Macbain: Hiya
    druth Vlodovic: suppressing feelings tends to have a pressure cooker effect
    Aphrodite Macbain: but just breathing them away? is that possible
    Archmage Atlantis: But truely, I came to speak of aramageddon
    Storm Nordwind: I suspect suppressing feelings and letting them go are two different things
    druth Vlodovic: supprisingly? to an extent
    Eos Amaterasu: letting be is letting go of yourself trying to prop up the letting be
    Aphrodite Macbain: sort of like doing tonglen for oneself
    Pema Pera: nice image!
    Eos Amaterasu: yeah, we're the hardest on ourselves
    Aphrodite Macbain: propping up the letting be...hmmm
    Aphrodite Macbain: creating a safe container
    Aphrodite Macbain: perhaps
    druth Vlodovic: letting go the things that caused the emotions could be a good start
    Pema Pera: or just going into the feelings . . . . without holding back halfway
    Pema Pera: and without identifying with them
    Aphrodite Macbain: I find the primal scream thing more upsetting than relieving
    Pema Pera: that's different
    Pema Pera: going into doesn't mean letting it all out :-)
    Archmage Atlantis: Yes, that is the actual thing Pema......not holding back
    Aphrodite Macbain: yes. I like what you're saying Pema but I'm not sure what that means

    Storm came up with a nice metaphor.

    Storm Nordwind: The sea will have waves, whatever we do. We can't stop the waves. But we can stop pretending to be the waves and let them pass in time.
    Hokon Cazalet: brb checking food in oven
    Aphrodite Macbain: nice metaphor- the oven
    Pema Pera: how about approaching feelings like a bridge, Aphrodite -- not a place to go live and put up a tent, but a place to connect different parts of your life?
    Aphrodite Macbain: Feelings as abridge from one state of being to another?
    Pema Pera: or connecting different aspects of ourselves
    Aphrodite Macbain: some bridges last longer than others
    Pema Pera: when feelings upset us, chances are that we are refusing to see something that we are hiding from ourselves
    Eos Amaterasu: play has quality of enjoying feelings, giving them full respect while at the same time highlighting both their communicative and their poofy nature
    Aphrodite Macbain: :-) poofy huh?
    Eos Amaterasu: as in avatar poofing
    druth Vlodovic: "when feelings upset us" upset by the fact of having the feelings?
    Pema Pera: hi Eliza!
    Eliza Madrigal: Hi Pema, everyone :)
    Aphrodite Macbain: Eliza! GTSY
    Eos Amaterasu: Hi Eliza
    Eliza Madrigal: :))
    Storm Nordwind waves
    Pema Pera: yes, Druth, different layers of upset, sometimes: getting angry at someone and then getting annoyed at getting angry :-)
    Pema Pera: and wanting to get rid of the anger . . . .
    Archmage Atlantis: Ok, 2 good coversations
    Archmage Atlantis: I chose this one
    druth Vlodovic: so we get frustrated lol
    Aphrodite Macbain: getting rid of the anger?
    Pema Pera: (and perhaps knowing that we're supposed to "let go" and wondering how to do that :-)
    Aphrodite Macbain: getting rid of the hurt?
    Archmage Atlantis: Anger is motivation
    Archmage Atlantis: Living in anger is hurt
    Aphrodite Macbain: Yes Pema. Exactly. Our emotions are not run by our thinking brain/
    Archmage Atlantis: Being anger is demonic
    Pema Pera: but in my experience going into a feeling is the better way to let it go and/or go beyond it
    Pema Pera: (but not so easy . . . )

    Sharing an opinion is one thing, and realizing (and remembering) that it's not that easy is another :-)

    Aphrodite Macbain: Rather than rationalizing it?
    Pema Pera: for sure!
    Storm Nordwind nods
    Aphrodite Macbain: If I can understand why I am hurt or angry, it is easier to get rid of it. Rationalism throws water on flames
    Aphrodite Macbain: of anger
    Pema Pera pictures a steaming rationalist :-)
    druth Vlodovic: sometimes it fans it, but then you get to direct it a little
    Archmage Atlantis: Life is difficult.....it is meant to be
    Aphrodite Macbain: No, I really feel that understanding thather than emotionally reacting is the best way to diffuse anger or hurt
    Archmage Atlantis: My mother was a difficult teacher
    Aphrodite Macbain: rather
    Pema Pera: oh yes, reacting is the worst!
    Archmage Atlantis: She loved me enough to be difficult
    Pema Pera: but understanding might be hard if we don't first really go into a feeling and find some calm there
    Archmage Atlantis: My father was a protector
    Aphrodite Macbain: If it is being caused by something I can't accept, what is my means at getting to that cause except by rational thinking?
    Archmage Atlantis: but not from my mother's teaching
    Pema Pera: going into the feeling of "I can't accept"
    Pema Pera: and rest there
    Pema Pera: (easier said than done :-)
    Aphrodite Macbain: indeed
    Pema Pera: (but worth a try)
    Aphrodite Macbain: I cant accept - means there is resistance and therefore tension
    Pema Pera: but you can never loose: you can go into the feeling of why you can't go into the feeling of can't accept!
    Aphrodite Macbain: accepting might be easier
    Eliza Madrigal: :)
    Aphrodite Macbain: lots of time on that cushion!
    Pema Pera: :-)
    Archmage Atlantis: Actually, chairs, not cushions or beds

    I felt deeply grateful, to hear Aphrodite speak more about her day.

    Aphrodite Macbain: I've been in such a turmoil, It's so good to be sitting with you here
    Eliza Madrigal: (((Aph))))
    druth Vlodovic: why can't you accept what is happening? are you fearful of consequences, offended at disrespect, afraid for your reputation?
    Archmage Atlantis: yes, druth
    Aphrodite Macbain: I am just deeply sad, hurt, and feeling a little guilty
    Storm Nordwind: All accepting and understanding strategies are hard when you have the overwhelming pain of an operation without an anaesthetic.
    Archmage Atlantis: And willing to say that
    Aphrodite Macbain: good simile
    Pema Pera nods at Storm
    druth Vlodovic: guilt is a good place to start, because it ought to be easiest
    Aphrodite Macbain: But I feel I have causd another pain. That's hard to deal with
    Aphrodite Macbain: I need their forgiveness which I doubt I will get
    Archmage Atlantis: My genetic ancestors, now we are more able to trace DNA, do not place me as a white English male.....
    Aphrodite Macbain suddenly feels embarased to be at the cente of attention
    Archmage Atlantis: Tho I like like that
    Storm Nordwind: Forgiveness is for the benefit only of the forgiver. Therefore start perhaps by forgiving yourself.
    Aphrodite Macbain: embarassed
    Aphrodite Macbain: embarrassed
    Eos Amaterasu: np, Aphro, part of the embrace of play as being

    From embarrased to embrace . . .

    Aphrodite Macbain: yes,
    Aphrodite Macbain: ((Eos))
    Pema Pera: very nice approach, Storm, feels like the right order
    Pema Pera: but often *seems* the hardest
    druth Vlodovic: make amends, move on
    druth Vlodovic: it's not as callous as it sounds
    Aphrodite Macbain: Hard to make amends to someone you may not see again
    Eliza Madrigal: appreciative of your openness, Aphrodite
    Archmage Atlantis: druth, for which part of what I am should I make amends
    Aphrodite Macbain wonders whether we can change the subject.
    druth Vlodovic: not everything I do is part of my being
    Aphrodite Macbain: how can it be separate druth?
    druth Vlodovic: situational
    Aphrodite Macbain: (((eliza)))
    Archmage Atlantis: we create the situation in which we live
    Eliza Madrigal: ty ty ::soaks that up::
    Aphrodite Macbain: we do indeed
    druth Vlodovic: it's what they tell people in parenting courses "never tell a kid he is bad, tell him he did a bad thing"
    Aphrodite Macbain: ssssssmainly unconsciously
    druth Vlodovic: the first is identity
    druth Vlodovic: the second is what he did
    druth Vlodovic: I doubt you are inherently evil
    Archmage Atlantis: Aph, too many ssss
    Aphrodite Macbain: St Augustine really started something
    Pema Pera: :-)
    Aphrodite Macbain: hehe. sometimes my snake gets loossssss
    druth Vlodovic: we participatye in creating the situation in which we live
    druth Vlodovic: it is not all we are
    Eos Amaterasu: SSSlytherin
    Eliza Madrigal: :)
    Aphrodite Macbain: :-)

    And from embracing to co-creating . . .

    Eos Amaterasu: we all co-create this big soup
    Eos Amaterasu: full of our juicy emotions
    Archmage Atlantis: Yes, true, Eos
    Aphrodite Macbain: I'd like to add some sweet herbs
    Eos Amaterasu: please do :-)
    Pema Pera is perking up at the thought of sssssoup
    Pema Pera: (not having had breakfast yet)
    Eliza Madrigal: is ssssleeepppyyyy, brain feels a bit soupy
    Aphrodite Macbain looks around for a brown sssssnake
    Storm Nordwind: mmmm erwtensoep
    Eliza Madrigal: :)
    Eos Amaterasu: the noodles are slythering
    Pema Pera: not fair!
    Eliza Madrigal: 'never tickle sleeping dragons'
    Eliza Madrigal: Night :)
    Pema Pera: erwtensoup hallicunations
    Storm Nordwind: hehe!
    Aphrodite Macbain: sslllleeep tight dear Eliza
    Archmage Atlantis: omg dragons
    Eos Amaterasu: 'night E!
    Pema Pera: we may have started a lingering sssss trend . . .
    Pema Pera: bye Eliza!
    Eliza Madrigal: pleasant day and night dreams to all!! Hugs
    Aphrodite Macbain: my snake really gets around. slitherey sot
    Archmage Atlantis: I gave away my koi yesterday
    Aphrodite Macbain: was he sick?
    Archmage Atlantis: The water here is bbad
    Aphrodite Macbain: maybe snake juice
    Aphrodite Macbain: contaminated it
    Archmage Atlantis: nNo...Chester would not come here unless it was important
    druth Vlodovic: g2g 'night all
    Storm Nordwind waves
    Eos Amaterasu: 'night druth
    Aphrodite Macbain: Bye
    Aphrodite Macbain: Bye! druth. Thanks for being here
    Archmage Atlantis: Saw my first white frog in 2 years
    Pema Pera: bye Druth!
    Eos Amaterasu: I must leave, myself, bye all
    Archmage Atlantis: today
    Aphrodite Macbain: white frog?
    Aphrodite Macbain: Bye
    Aphrodite Macbain: Bye! Eos
    Pema Pera: bye Eos

    Storm echoed Eos, sans "," (^_^)

    Storm Nordwind: "I must leave myself" says Eos... ;)
    Pema Pera: hahaha
    Aphrodite Macbain: who is this brown snake anyway?
    Archmage Atlantis: A computer program,. Aph
    Aphrodite Macbain: very clever Arch
    Pema Pera looking at his watch for erwtensoup time . . . .
    Archmage Atlantis: Created by
    Aphrodite Macbain: First time I've felt peaceful all day
    Archmage Atlantis: those who
    Aphrodite Macbain: Thanks everyone
    Pema Pera: so glad to hear that, Aphrodite!
    Archmage Atlantis: might flee
    Pema Pera: and thanks so much for sharing
    Pema Pera: be well, everybody!
    Storm Nordwind smiles wih Aphrodite
    Storm Nordwind: Bye Pema
    Aphrodite Macbain: thanks for treading softly
    Aphrodite Macbain: Bye
    Aphrodite Macbain: Bye! Pema

    Off I went, so I will leave the rest of the log uncommented.

    Aphrodite Macbain: Hokon are yu still with us?
    Storm Nordwind: brown snake says goodbye, but never goes!
    Aphrodite Macbain: My cat has now crawled into a paper bag and is rolling around in bed with it
    Storm Nordwind: Welcome Mistress of Flowers!
    Aphrodite Macbain: Paradise!
    Aphrodite Macbain: Hello
    Paradise Tennant: hiya storm aphrodite .. hokon . arch :)
    Storm Nordwind: Excuse gentlefolk - I have some work to finish :)
    Hokon Cazalet: back
    Paradise Tennant: smiles nite nite storm sweet dreams
    Hokon Cazalet: bye storm =)
    Storm Nordwind waves
    Aphrodite Macbain: I'll bde you have Storm. I'm looking forward to tomorrow. Goodnight sweet eagle
    Paradise Tennant: hiya roger :)
    Hokon Cazalet: hiya roger
    Aphrodite Macbain: hi roger
    Aphrodite Macbain: grab a cushion
    Archmage Atlantis: Chester and Nimbus need me to negotiate cats in one house... Nmaste
    Aphrodite Macbain: omg
    Paradise Tennant: smiles at arch ..give cheser a welcome hug for me :) have a good nite ..namaste
    Roger Ormenthal: Hi, sorry I'm late, and must actually run in a moment...thanks
    Aphrodite Macbain: paradise you are magnificent!
    Paradise Tennant: smiles at aph thank you another vita dress ..just like wearing art really :)
    Hokon Cazalet: =)
    Paradise Tennant: smiles .. we were talking of cats in bags ?
    Hokon Cazalet: .
    Paradise Tennant: smiles
    Hokon Cazalet: =)
    Aphrodite Macbain: sorry -on the phone
    Hokon Cazalet: thats cool =)
    Paradise Tennant: posted this last nite but pema can always cut it out my current fav doggie video
    Paradise Tennant: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nGeKSiCQkPw
    Hokon Cazalet: silly =)
    Paradise Tennant: smiles I know I can watch it repeatedly .. because I love silly
    Hokon Cazalet: Weeee! ^.^
    Aphrodite Macbain: my cat Cleo teats bags like it is the first one she has experiences
    Paradise Tennant: there is just not enought of it in the world
    Aphrodite Macbain: HAhah Hokon
    Hokon Cazalet: :Þ
    Aphrodite Macbain: Hokon!!
    Aphrodite Macbain: so there!
    Hokon Cazalet: !
    Aphrodite Macbain dies from laughing....
    Hokon Cazalet: Yaaaaayyyyyyyy!
    Paradise Tennant: smiles
    Hokon Cazalet: lol
    Paradise Tennant: omingokko
    Aphrodite Macbain: That felt good!
    Hokon Cazalet: Weeee! ^.^
    Paradise Tennant: onigokko
    Hokon Cazalet: hehe
    Aphrodite Macbain: I think I'm going to bed now bfore I make more of a fool of myself
    Hokon Cazalet: Nuuu!
    Hokon Cazalet: Nuuu!
    Aphrodite Macbain: onigokko
    Hokon Cazalet: Weeee! ^.^
    Paradise Tennant: smiles at aph :))
    Hokon Cazalet: Weeee! ^.^
    Aphrodite Macbain grins at Paradise
    Aphrodite Macbain chortl;es at Hozon
    Aphrodite Macbain: chortles
    Aphrodite Macbain: stop
    Hokon Cazalet: (whats chortling?)
    Hokon Cazalet: lol @ paradise
    Paradise Tennant: smiles
    Aphrodite Macbain: laughing like a baby
    Hokon Cazalet: hehe
    Paradise Tennant: giggling
    Aphrodite Macbain giggles
    Hokon Cazalet giggles back =P
    Hokon Cazalet: Weeee! ^.^
    Hokon Cazalet: Wewt Wewt! :D
    Hokon Cazalet: Wewt Wewt! :D
    Aphrodite Macbain: like that
    Hokon Cazalet: hehe
    Aphrodite Macbain: what a marvellous site you are paradise
    Hokon Cazalet: hehe
    Hokon Cazalet: thats pretty cool with her dress
    Aphrodite Macbain: Bye
    Aphrodite Macbain: by Bye! dear ones
    Hokon Cazalet: she really is walking art now
    Hokon Cazalet: byeeeeeee
    Paradise Tennant: stop
    Paradise Tennant: bye aph
    Hokon Cazalet: lol
    Paradise Tennant: smiles
    Paradise Tennant: nite nite hokon

    Tag page (Edit tags)
    • No tags
    You must login to post a comment.
    Powered by MindTouch Core