2009.07.24 07:00 - Identify, re-identify... un-identify?

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    The Guardian for this meeting was quen Oh. The comments are by quen Oh.

    quen Oh: hi Eliza
    Eliza Madrigal: Hi Quen :)
    quen Oh: how are you?
    Eliza Madrigal: I like your stretching animation :)
    quen Oh: :-) lol
    Eliza Madrigal: And, I'm well. You?
    quen Oh: me too
    quen Oh: at first I thought it displayed disinterest, as it is yawning..
    quen Oh: but especially men seem to like it
    Eliza Madrigal: ;-)
    Eliza Madrigal: No, I love extra natural touches
    Eliza Madrigal: Some mornings it would be fitting for me to be here in pajamas with tea
    quen Oh: :-) hehe indeed
    quen Oh: so your purple hair is not about the natural touches? ;-) winks*
    Eliza Madrigal: hahah
    quen Oh: well it does give an identity!
    quen Oh: outstanding
    Eliza Madrigal: Thanks :)
    quen Oh: and it is nice
    Eliza Madrigal: I like it actually, for some reason it makes me feel a litle older than Eliza with dark hair. Go figure
    quen Oh: ;-) amazing you like to feel older?
    Eliza Madrigal: Well, Eliza had begun to feel very young.
    Eliza Madrigal: I donno :))
    quen Oh: like how young?
    Eliza Madrigal: So it was get rid of her, or do something. Hahah
    quen Oh: lol
    Eliza Madrigal: Hmm... a teen?
    quen Oh: wel the mass here in SL is young, barely past teenage looking
    quen Oh: hehe
    Eliza Madrigal: yes, that is what SL conjurs I think
    Eliza Madrigal: in some ways
    Eliza Madrigal: And for a while that was fun
    quen Oh: we live in the 'makeable' world, and it is apparently how our ideal looks like
    quen Oh agrees
    Eliza Madrigal: yes, the 'ideal'
    quen Oh: wanted to look you, but more important have an ava that has some character, in a way that is difficult to explain
    Eliza Madrigal: exactly!!
    quen Oh: most look too much like living dolls here in my opinion
    Eliza Madrigal: I don't mind the little lines next to my eyes...
    Eliza Madrigal nods
    quen Oh: they are nice! they mean that you actually laugh sometimes ;-)
    Yidam joins us, I had never met him. And right after him, Sophia arrives too.
    quen Oh: hello Yidam!
    Eliza Madrigal: Yes... they've been hard won!
    quen Oh: welcome
    Eliza Madrigal: :D
    quen Oh: lol yes, all that laughing to get the nice lines next to your eyes, hard work
    Eliza Madrigal: Yidam is a very expressive friend :)
    quen Oh: hello Sophia!
    Eliza Madrigal: Hi Sophia :)
    quen Oh: nice to meet you Yidam, don't think we have met before?
    Eliza Madrigal wonders why she is looking to the sky
    Yidam Nightfire: Hi all!
    sophia Placebo: hi yadim
    Yidam Nightfire: hi quen..no i don't think so
    Eliza Madrigal really enjoys sophia's fairy look :)
    sophia Placebo: ^^
    quen Oh: we were talking ava-appearance in this makeable world
    sophia Placebo: intersting topic
    Eliza Madrigal: and actually Quen, your av is beautiful and yet not too like a doll...
    Yidam Nightfire: shes still rezzing for me
    quen Oh: ;-) thanks, did some work on it in the beginning
    Yidam Nightfire: SL is very slow for me tody
    quen Oh: oh dear
    quen Oh: sorry for you Yidam
    Yidam Nightfire: turning down draw distance
    sophia Placebo: quen looks cute
    quen Oh: what made you decide to look like this Yidam? it looks quite interesting
    quen Oh: thank you sophia, you look a fairytale today with the wings
    Yidam Nightfire: its a very naughty incubus av...with some mods by me...i like the blue skin and horns :)
    Yidam Nightfire: its fun :)
    quen Oh: it is :-)
    --BELL--
    Eliza Madrigal: yes the blue skin in particular is great I think ... conjurs a kind of intensity. For me the balance between feeling comfortable as myself and yet getting 'into' being in another world and all that offers is part of the fun :)
    sophia Placebo: Eliza is a cloud for me
    Eliza Madrigal: :"I pass through the pores of the oceans and shores...."
    quen Oh: (will make picture, which will be more interesting log-wise)
    PaB 24.07.2009_001.jpg
    Eliza Madrigal: (Percy Shelly's 'The Cloud')
    Eliza Madrigal: Nice idea Quen :)
    quen Oh: you will see in the log what Eliza 'the cloud' looked like
    Eliza Madrigal: :)
    Eliza Madrigal: In other news, I began the APAPB excercize yesterday officially
    Eliza Madrigal: I know...late start. Hah
    quen Oh: funny that in SL we know that what we see is individual, dependent on pc, graphics card, your sl-viewer and so on
    quen Oh: in rl it is too I think, but less evident
    Eliza Madrigal: Hm, quen true. We know there are filters so we factor them
    sophia Placebo: the 9 seconds one you mean ?
    Eliza Madrigal: The 20 minute one.
    sophia Placebo: ok
    quen Oh: good to realise how we don't all see exactly the same even if we watch the same
    Yidam Nightfire: our perceptions depend upon our individual sense powers
    Eliza Madrigal: :)
    Yidam Nightfire: and our attention
    quen Oh: interesting Eliza. APAPB-exerise?
    Eliza Madrigal: I was hesitant at first, but it seemed like the space opened for it now
    sophia Placebo: Yadim look is so demonish with the white hair
    Eliza Madrigal: yes, sitting with 'appreciating the presence of appearance as a presentation by Being" ... hehe sounded so complicated to my brain at first
    sophia Placebo: sorry for jumping *
    Eliza Madrigal: He's a friendly demon. Hahha
    Eliza Madrigal smiles
    Eliza Madrigal: brb
    quen Oh: (dont' be Sophia, one of the interesting things of SL-chat that it can :-)
    Yidam Nightfire: demon is such a "label" after all
    Eliza Madrigal: (thanks, wanted coffee... tastes incredible this morning)
    sophia Placebo: demonish look is a label yes
    Yidam Nightfire: i like your fairy av
    Eliza Madrigal: there are things that used to scare me as a child which after learning about became friendly
    quen Oh: what kind of things Eliza?
    Eliza Madrigal: or dreams that were nightmares which changed into comforting things....
    quen Oh: I don't know much about demons Yidam?
    Eliza Madrigal: like large dogs with big teeth..used to have recurring nightmares
    sophia Placebo: ty ^^ , you look great yourself!
    Yidam Nightfire: i'll detach the horns
    Yidam Nightfire: less scary :)
    Eliza Madrigal smiles
    sophia Placebo: hehe no
    sophia Placebo: it is in the eyes and the hair
    quen Oh: hehe I love dogs, also large ones, but was fortunate to not meeting the scary ones
    sophia Placebo: which fit your purpose which is good
    Eliza Madrigal: Now I love seeing big dogs in my dreams ... much friendlier
    quen Oh: hehe nice
    quen Oh: what kind of dogs?
    sophia Placebo: fantastic Eliza
    Eliza Madrigal: and funny because we always had shepherds when I was a child, and poodles
    Eliza Madrigal: so I grew up loving dogs
    Eliza Madrigal: but for whatever reason rottweilers in particular were terrifying
    Eliza Madrigal: Until I had a dream where they were instead friendly huskies
    quen Oh: nice!
    quen Oh: in front of your sleigh?
    Eliza Madrigal: haha....no the dreams were far more involved than that, but is the gist
    --BELL--
    quen Oh: so what made you turn virtual demon Yidam? :-)
    sophia Placebo: i met someone yesterday who said that being naked in sl makes her feel more free, in comparision to rl where she has to wear suits all day
    quen Oh: interesting.. ;-) would perceive myself more free wearing clothing ;- (from looks of others)
    sophia Placebo: intesting how magicaly vertiual look might change rl mood even if it were infront of a screen
    Eliza Madrigal: yes
    sophia Placebo: me too
    Eliza Madrigal: they've actually had some studies where keeping a thin av helped people lose weight, for instance
    Eliza Madrigal: because they saw 'themselves' as thin
    quen Oh: you feel more free now you have virtual wings Sophia?
    sophia Placebo: hehe
    sophia Placebo: i dont mix much btw the 2 worlds
    sophia Placebo: but i crave for tp in rl sometimes
    Eliza Madrigal: hehe, yes definitely
    Eliza Madrigal: and to look at people's profiles
    sophia Placebo: yes
    Eliza Madrigal: For me, SL cuts through a lot of time spent getting comfortable talking with people? Then it is easier to cut through that time offline?
    Eliza Madrigal: Which sounds aggressive...not exactly what I mean
    Eliza Madrigal: It just means that maybe I'm more expectant that people would like to talk/connect than I used to be
    Eliza Madrigal: Then again, when we're more open, the world is too :)
    quen Oh: well it is one of the main qualities in sl, we don't have to work, eat, clean... anything, we mainly meet other people here
    sophia Placebo: rl settings are diffrent , we log in here when we are comfortable
    sophia Placebo: at least we seem like comfortable
    Eliza Madrigal: Hm, true :)
    sophia Placebo: even if someone get bored from someone else , who would know
    Eliza Madrigal: hehe
    Yidam Nightfire: i find the sl av's a visual aid for meditation visualization :)
    Unfortunately I got a phonecall, so I missed a part. (That's the nice thing of chat, you can read back what you missed).
    quen Oh: (phone)
    Eliza Madrigal: that's interesting Yidam.. so a tool/doorway for you?
    Yidam Nightfire: definitely
    Eliza Madrigal: I like that idea
    Eliza Madrigal: Maybe there are many ways things can be turned around... for instance frightening things seen as not... or what might be distractions to practice as tools?
    Eliza Madrigal: if we flip things the duality can break down a bit?
    --BELL--
    Eliza Madrigal: SL at first was a great enhancement to practice... had been sitting a lot but access to teachings seemed far away. Then SL and a flood of teachings to sort, but then sitting and reading dwindled. 'Balance' doesn't seem exciting goal though .. guess one can drawn a bit to the excitement of extremes.
    Eliza Madrigal: :) Or balance becomes a goal which misses the point again. Sigh :)
    sophia Placebo nods
    Eliza Madrigal smiles... have to laugh at ourselves
    sophia Placebo: :) why ?
    Eliza Madrigal: for me at least, is helpful to realize even when I 'think' I'm getting 'ahold' of things, I'm actually not.
    Eliza Madrigal: and rest
    Eliza Madrigal: inwardly
    sophia Placebo: :)
    Eliza Madrigal: "there's nothing I can do" can be a liberating place?
    sophia Placebo: not if you take it to the extreme
    Eliza Madrigal: say more?
    sophia Placebo: there is nothing i can do to get thinner for example
    sophia Placebo: means there is nothing i can do to manage my life style
    Eliza Madrigal: Ah, you mean in a sense of giving up responsibility
    Eliza Madrigal: "I can't help it"
    sophia Placebo: and anything that result from manageing my life style would be meaningless
    sophia Placebo: yes
    Eliza Madrigal: Ah, yes. I suppose it depends on where one is on the spectrum...?
    Eliza Madrigal: Meaning, some tend to take on 'everything' as their responsibility
    Eliza Madrigal: :)
    sophia Placebo: ok i got your point
    Eliza Madrigal: but I hear you. The 'answers' are never "out there"
    sophia Placebo: too much worries
    Eliza Madrigal nods
    Eliza Madrigal smiles
    Yidam Nightfire: Sl gives us opportunties to re-identify ourselves ...a common technique in therapy i'm told
    sophia Placebo: hmm
    Eliza Madrigal: hmm
    sophia Placebo: to identefy something is to put the borders for it
    sophia Placebo: you cant frame what you cant see though
    Eliza Madrigal: So, what would the borders be for the naked friend ?
    sophia Placebo: one should see onself to identefy it then to think about how to re identefy it
    --BELL--
    sophia Placebo: i dont know !
    quen Oh: sorry, that was more complicated phonecall than expected
    sophia Placebo: *:::* WELCOME BACK *:::*
    Eliza Madrigal: No worries Quen :)

    That was a longer phonecall than expected, it meant I had only a minute or so left, to make an appointment in time.

    Too bad, because reading back I sure would have had some questions about identifying, re-identifying or the option of un-identifying..

    quen Oh: gosh and only to be back to say I unfortunately have to go... sorry
    Yidam Nightfire: bye quen!
    Eliza Madrigal: :) Nice to see you today Quen
    sophia Placebo: bye , nice to meet you ^^
    quen Oh: you too! have fun!
    quen Oh: looking forward to read all when putting it online
    quen Oh: bye now
    Eliza Madrigal: :) Bye
    Eliza Madrigal is thinking about your point sophia, that we get a chance to see an identity we've created here sometimes, in a way we might not otherwise?
    Eliza Madrigal: Or certainly read ourselves in logs after the fact and think "huh?"...heheh
    sophia Placebo: you might see nothing here or in rl sometimes ^^ clarity moments are so precoiuse and few , sustaing them is what meditation is about i guess
    Eliza Madrigal: yes! :))
    sophia Placebo: most of time we are but a sleep walkers
    Eliza Madrigal nods...going through motions
    Eliza Madrigal: I hesitated to sign on this morning, was feeling very scattered. Thanks for the company guys :)
    Yidam Nightfire: my pleasure :)
    sophia Placebo: ty Eliza :)
    sophia Placebo: tc
    Eliza Madrigal smiles
    sophia Placebo: you were not leaving ?
    Eliza Madrigal: Not yet... you?
    Eliza Madrigal: This is a nice place to inwind when feeling wound :)
    sophia Placebo: i guess i was leaving and though you just was leaving ^^
    Eliza Madrigal: *unwind
    Eliza Madrigal: ^^
    sophia Placebo: yes many nice poeple come here
    Eliza Madrigal: Oh, nice sophia, you twirl!
    sophia Placebo: makes it really comfy
    sophia Placebo: hehe yes
    sophia Placebo: well see you later !
    Eliza Madrigal: You know, I still haven't played much with AOs ...only have the one free one someone helped me to find when I first signed on...hehe
    Eliza Madrigal: Bye for now Sophia :)
    sophia Placebo: Aos are expensive !

    And Sophia has to go too. Now the 'official' PaB session is over, as Eliza concludes at the end of the unofficial afterparty ;-)

    (for very curious readers:)

    Yidam Nightfire: ao are difficult
    Eliza Madrigal: yes, a little complicated and pricey
    Yidam Nightfire: i just built one for anotehr av...took a while
    Yidam Nightfire: but cute
    Eliza Madrigal: built one... put several together?
    Yidam Nightfire: ?
    Yidam Nightfire: loaded animations into a AO HUD
    Yidam Nightfire: :)
    Eliza Madrigal: yes that is what I was asking... Oh
    Yidam Nightfire: have to find a good AO
    Yidam Nightfire: learn how to edit it
    Yidam Nightfire: then select good animations to load
    Yidam Nightfire: or buy one already done haha
    Yidam Nightfire: usually about 4000 L or so
    Eliza Madrigal: ouch
    Eliza Madrigal looks at the SL 'to do/learn' list and thinks it can sit a while :)
    Yidam Nightfire: or select one AO and Play it when you want to
    Yidam Nightfire: best thing to start with
    Yidam Nightfire: a stand animation
    Yidam Nightfire: so lets see those shoes! :)
    Eliza Madrigal: I have the one freebie one... if I add to that then it will do it itself right :)
    Eliza Madrigal: Cute huh? :)
    Yidam Nightfire: have to stand to really see
    Eliza Madrigal: I think, btw, that I'm nervous about going to this temple which is why I'm feeling tangled today
    Yidam Nightfire: checking you out :)
    Yidam Nightfire: haha...why nervous?
    Eliza Madrigal: hehehe
    --BELL--
    Yidam Nightfire: cute!
    Eliza Madrigal remembers the log and here asks Quen to edit back to a more PaB ending ?! hahh
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