2009.12.14 19:00 - Isolation is the mirror

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    Wol Euler recovered this session from the autologging database.

    Eos Amaterasu: Hi fox

    Fox Monacular: Hi Eos

    Eos Amaterasu: Are you still in Canada?

    Fox Monacular: yes, still here:)

    Eos Amaterasu: moi aussi

    Fox Monacular: in Halifax or in Montreal? :)

    Eos Amaterasu: In Halifax

    Fox Monacular: we'll be moving to Boston in February... later than we thought, but my husband cannot finish his thesis on time:)

    Eos Amaterasu: :-)

    Fox Monacular: actually he'll only be a husband technically on friday

    Eos Amaterasu: Oh, congratulations!

    Fox Monacular: thanks:)

    Eos Amaterasu: Have you been being playfully?

    Fox Monacular: hehe, yes quite a bit (helps when you spend alot of tiem at home with a cranky toddler)

    Fox Monacular: very playful

    Fox Monacular: how about you?


    Eos Amaterasu: active in all kinds of ways, keeping a playful perspective, even if intermittently

    Fox Monacular: it helps me to be reminded (by myself or by others) to keep playful perspective... helpful when things get aggravated

    Eos Amaterasu: newly waking being, like a baby, is both fiercely energetic and playful (in my experience)

    Eos Amaterasu: It's starting to get wintery here at the Playgoda

    Eos Amaterasu: There's something funny about this being such a reflection of RL (RL in some quarters)

    Fox Monacular: yes, I thought so too, it is strange:)

    Eos Amaterasu: Heaps of snow here and there

    Eos Amaterasu: A bit more than in Halifax at the moment

    Fox Monacular: waking is energetic if you have had enough sleep :) otherwise....

    Fox Monacular: here there's tons of snow! very cool for playing outside!

    Eos Amaterasu: :-)

    Eos Amaterasu: I was visiting a Kami shrine in the Rocky Mountains a few years ago; snowy weather; I threw a snowball over the Tori gate, as a kind of Canadian bow from my son

    Fox Monacular: :)

    Fox Monacular: I get so little sleep these days, I don't really wake up playful:)

    Eos Amaterasu: Are you in a mixed realms (waking, sleeping, dreaming, reverie, ....?) state?

    Eos Amaterasu: Hi Bene

    Benedizione Vita: allo eos, fox

    Fox Monacular: definitely, an altered state

    Fox Monacular: Hi Bene

    Benedizione Vita: ooh, what a haunting night here at pab

    Eos Amaterasu: hooooo?

    Benedizione Vita: yes, the owl and the crickets and the fountain, I mean

    Eos Amaterasu: Does he still call you owl?

    Benedizione Vita: what? ;^)

    Eos Amaterasu: (Darn... I was hoping you would say "Who?" "-)

    Benedizione Vita: haha indeed, hence the what :)

    Eos Amaterasu: :-)

    Benedizione Vita: took me a sec--that's funny :)

    Eos Amaterasu: Any suggestions for how to approach the upcoming 90 secs (a short phrase?)

    Benedizione Vita: "play as being"

    Fox Monacular: I didn't get the joke :-(

    Eos Amaterasu: :-)

    Eos Amaterasu: an owl goes "hooo"

    Eos Amaterasu: Q: Does he still call you owl? A: Who?

    Fox Monacular: aaa-ha!


    Fox Monacular: ok, second language, makes you slow:)

    Eos Amaterasu: tak

    Fox Monacular: da

    Eos Amaterasu: :-)

    Fox Monacular: now it's getting better, but in the beginning... when you live in a new country, everybody laughs, and I just pretended, you know so that nobody realizes they have to explain yet another joke to me :)

    Eos Amaterasu: Yes, the feeling of not being on the same page ,or getting all the same inputs, as others

    Eos Amaterasu: that can be isolating

    Benedizione Vita: what does it mean, to be isolated?

    Eos Amaterasu: to be alone, or cut off from human contact

    Fox Monacular: or to be near enough to human contact, but not quite attuned

    Fox Monacular: I find that even in multicultural montreal, sometimes people from other cultures are not treated quite seriously

    Benedizione Vita: what does it mean, though, what makes one isolated? how does one know one is isolated? is it a feeling? a thought?

    Benedizione Vita: what sort of state of being is it?

    Eos Amaterasu: I think that can vary. I have been alone sometimes, on solitary retreat, for example, and it has felt very good.

    Benedizione Vita: were you, in that case, isolated?

    Eos Amaterasu: But it can feel more the way Fox described it also

    Eos Amaterasu: Yes, on retreat I was physically isolated (solitary retreat)

    Fox Monacular: yes, isolated in teh retreat is actually a luxury (so it felt to me), isolated but protected

    Eos Amaterasu: Highly recommend it, by the way: the best favor you can do yourself (and others :-)

    Benedizione Vita: so in that sense you were physically isolated, but I assume in some other sense you were not, since you specified

    Fox Monacular: but isolated socially can be anxiety-provoking

    Eos Amaterasu: Yes, there you are "with" people but in some painful ways not with them

    Benedizione Vita: can the two of you think of a context in which social isolation would feel or seem or be good, in some sense?

    Fox Monacular: I liked isolation in retreats, it felt like, with the help of others, you're able to build an invisible bubble around yourself to facilitate your practice

    Fox Monacular: well, when I was a teenager, isolated meant cool:)

    Benedizione Vita: hmmm

    Benedizione Vita: but there was probaby actually a kind of anguish in that, no?

    Fox Monacular: yes, definitely

    Eos Amaterasu: There may also be the sense of not having to say anything or be anything for anyone's self - that might be isolation , with people, in a good way

    Eos Amaterasu: for anyone else

    Eos Amaterasu: :-)

    Benedizione Vita: this is interesting--it comes from the latin "insula," meaning "island"

    Fox Monacular: I feel like during times when I am more relaxed and fulfilled - I don't mind isolation at all, I'm fine with the fact that people might not understand me

    Eos Amaterasu: well-being

    Fox Monacular: but at other times, when I'm more tired or anxious - it feels bad

    Fox Monacular: so I guess isolation really is a reflection of own state

    Benedizione Vita: it is a kind of mirror?

    Eos Amaterasu: it could be the mirror itself


    Fox Monacular: the mirror, yes, I think so

    Eos Amaterasu: In a way you don't even have yourself; that's part of it

    Benedizione Vita: "Isolation is the mirror"--we have come to something very nice :)

    Eos Amaterasu: You also have to be patient with and tolerate and humor yourself

    Benedizione Vita: who looks into the mirror, and what does he see?

    Fox Monacular: seems like always a new person

    Benedizione Vita: ... owl! ;^)

    Fox Monacular: like Lacanian mirror stage:) idealized whatever stage we're going through

    Eos Amaterasu: :-)

    Eos Amaterasu: Lacanian mirror stage?

    Fox Monacular: you know, at some point the infant realizes that the person in the mirror is himself

    Eos Amaterasu: ah, yes

    Fox Monacular: but he sees (presumably) an ideal infant

    Fox Monacular: and so we keep negotiating our identities throughout our whole lives

    Eos Amaterasu: I remember when my little sister first started to use the word "I" to refer to herself

    Fox Monacular: yesterday the mirror said I was good to go grocery shopping

    Fox Monacular: today it says I'm not wedding-ready

    Fox Monacular: :)

    Benedizione Vita: "mirror, mirror, on the wall..."

    Eos Amaterasu: a stressful time, no doubt

    Fox Monacular: wedding? no, not really stressful:) it's just that we're cooking the food ourselves

    Fox Monacular: so we anticipate a lot of chopping:)

    Benedizione Vita: please be careful!

    Eos Amaterasu: Sounds enjoyable....

    Fox Monacular: hehe, I'll be particularly careful with the ring finger

    Eos Amaterasu: I realized a while ago that the prepping for a celebration or event is as much part of the event as it itself

    Fox Monacular: yes, for sure! and it sets the mood for the actual event too sometimes

    Eos Amaterasu: gives it that wu wei feeling

    Eos Amaterasu: doing as celebrating

    Benedizione Vita: well, fox and eos, it is time for me to go--goodnight :)

    Fox Monacular: goodnight Bene

    Eos Amaterasu: Good night, Bene and Fox

    Eos Amaterasu: Actually, I need to disappear as well

    Fox Monacular: I should go too...

    Fox Monacular: goodnight Eos

    Eos Amaterasu: Have a beautifula nd joyful wedding, fox!

    Fox Monacular: thanks!:)

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