2010.02.20 07:00 - Fears

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    The Guardian for this meeting was sophia Placebo. The comments are by sophia Placebo.

    Bertram Jacobus: hello sophia ... :-)
    sophia Placebo: Hello Bert :)
    Bertram Jacobus: we are not too late today ... ;-)
    sophia Placebo grins
    sophia Placebo: iam making sure iam not late today
    sophia Placebo: now i'll be afk praying time in rl , bb in like 10 mints
    Bertram Jacobus: oh. great ! okay ...
    Bertram Jacobus: hey yaku ! :-)
    Yakuzza Lethecus: hey you both
    Bertram Jacobus: sophia has praying time until around 7:10 (!) ... :-)
    sophia Placebo: back
    sophia Placebo: Hello Yak
    Bertram Jacobus: wb sophia :-)
    sophia Placebo: ty
    Bertram Jacobus: now he may be absent ... ;-)
    Yakuzza Lethecus: not really but thinking about what i was talking to somebody else before
    Bertram Jacobus: what was it ?
    sophia Placebo: tell us
    Yakuzza Lethecus: hehe, it´s in general how i engage ppl in second life what i kind of pictures i have about them and what i might be able to talk to them
    Yakuzza Lethecus: now to not loose trust...
    Yakuzza Lethecus: it´s tricky sharing to much at once might make you look like weired
    Yakuzza Lethecus: not sharing enough might make you look like you´re just stealing from them
    sophia Placebo: true
    Yakuzza Lethecus: and thinking to open about these things might make you look paranoid :)
    Bertram Jacobus: in which way "paranoid" ?
    Yakuzza Lethecus: oh, thinking too much about perception and being percieved, as soon as those thoughts get dominant and might block you from actually being in the situation
    Bertram Jacobus: oh. i see.
    Bertram Jacobus: ty for sharing that with us (!) :-)
    Yakuzza Lethecus: actually that´s that for me and pab and dropping things is highly related to that for me
    Bertram Jacobus: you may know : i like openness a lot ... (?)
    Bertram Jacobus: and i see boundries of openness only where it would hurt people ...
    Bertram Jacobus: so what did you mean with highly related dropping here : fears ?
    sophia Placebo: openness could hurt self to maybe
    sophia Placebo: too*
    Yakuzza Lethecus: yes, fears concerning the thoughts of other ppl
    Bertram Jacobus: i meant that including when i wrote "people" sophia ... ;-)
    Yakuzza Lethecus: the own subjective truth might hurt somebody else but then a relationship starts to be based on lie´s
    Yakuzza Lethecus: but talking about something that might hurt somebody else might even turned out to have been irrational in itself especially if it´s just under 4 eyes
    Bertram Jacobus: hello bleu ... :-)
    Yakuzza Lethecus: hey bleu :)
    sophia Placebo: hello bleu
    Yakuzza Lethecus: 3 hrs until the workshop starts
    Yakuzza Lethecus: ähm salon
    Bleu Oleander: yes!
    Yakuzza Lethecus: this time it´s at least in a good time for western europe :)
    Bleu Oleander: that was my idea!
    Bertram Jacobus: but, yaku, why fear that ?
    Yakuzza Lethecus: it´s tricky
    Bertram Jacobus: i like an orientation i learned from buddhism. that is "motivation". a very good measure mean to me. it doesn´t give space for fears if i don´t err ...
    sophia Placebo: maybe fear from the deafs chat ?
    Bertram Jacobus: what are deaf chats ?
    sophia Placebo: deaf poeple sitting togather to chat , thay all talk but no one can hear
    Bertram Jacobus: hm ...
    sophia Placebo: wrong reciepnt
    Bertram Jacobus: ah - hm ... must that be feared ? ;-)
    sophia Placebo: yes
    Bertram Jacobus: why ?
    sophia Placebo: so not to waste your energy
    Bertram Jacobus: but i like to communicate when i chat - so it´s not wasted (?) - and if one always tries to help ... : same : no waste of energy ever -
    sophia Placebo: helping a dead to go back to live ?
    sophia Placebo: come*
    Bertram Jacobus: a dead ?
    sophia Placebo: life*
    sophia Placebo: you said helping is never wasted
    Bertram Jacobus: chat with deads ?
    Bertram Jacobus: yes
    sophia Placebo: i think of it like that , heart us a bank , it has an acount for poeple -helping them loving them ,trusting them- but this account is not infinit , if you pour too much too fast you would get broken , you need to give and recive , to refill , some poeple though have bigger accounts and some have smaller
    sophia Placebo: is*
    Bertram Jacobus: i agree , although i would like and hope, that this account in the end is infinite - when we have set it free completly ...
    Bleu Oleander: when you give you are receiving
    sophia Placebo: when , but untill then i'll be easy on myself when i have fears
    sophia Placebo: reciving good and bad
    Bleu Oleander: bad?
    Bertram Jacobus: but i can learn to see chances
    Bertram Jacobus: and to grow trust in myself
    sophia Placebo: yeah bad , like traditional bad
    Bertram Jacobus: consodering this unlimited abilities in us all ...
    Bertram Jacobus: these*
    Bleu Oleander: could you say more sophia?
    sophia Placebo: i dont think of it as unlimited
    Bleu Oleander: what limits you?
    sophia Placebo: me
    sophia Placebo: whats limits me is me
    sophia Placebo: and me is not much diffrent than the others
    Yakuzza Lethecus: i´ll be afk for a while, i don´t know if i am back until the end
    Bleu Oleander: bye for now
    sophia Placebo: Bleu , you give someone a room in your house but next morning you wake to find it being robbed
    Bleu Oleander: that's not a given though
    sophia Placebo: no?
    Bertram Jacobus: ok yaku - have nice trips ! ... ;-)
    sophia Placebo: didnt that give you anger , regert , distrust and self balming with lots of headach ?
    Bertram Jacobus: to me, such is something to learn from ...
    Bertram Jacobus: i had it once, that a "friend" stole something from me, quite in the way you described sophia
    Bleu Oleander: I agree
    sophia Placebo: you have to learn from it but that wont be your only thought and feeling at that time
    Bertram Jacobus: and what i learned from that was to differ better -
    Bertram Jacobus: but that is the i would it call constructive element
    Bertram Jacobus: and i always try to focus these helpful aspects
    sophia Placebo nods
    sophia Placebo: i g2g , been nice talking to you , nice meeting you Bleu
    Bleu Oleander: bye
    Bleu Oleander: nice meeting you
    Bertram Jacobus: bye sophia - have a good time ! *wave*
    Bertram Jacobus: do your "salons" cause a lot of work, preparation and such blue ?
    Bleu Oleander: yes
    Bleu Oleander: we try to meet interesting people
    Bertram Jacobus: what is it, what you have to do for it ?
    Bleu Oleander: and set up time for them to meet with us
    Bertram Jacobus: ah. i see - yes.
    Bleu Oleander: it's mostly organizing our members to be able to come
    Bertram Jacobus: and who is "we" ? :-)
    Bleu Oleander: TH Ordinary and me
    Bertram Jacobus: ah okay.
    Bleu Oleander: we direct Spirit of the Senses
    Bleu Oleander: in RL and SL
    Bertram Jacobus: where is it in rl ?
    Bleu Oleander: we are based in Phoenix
    Bertram Jacobus: arizona ...
    Bleu Oleander: we do trips to NYC and CA
    Bleu Oleander: yes
    Bertram Jacobus: hehe - curious : "phoenix, arizona" is like one single word ;-)
    Bleu Oleander: where are you from?
    Bertram Jacobus: cologne, germany ;o)
    Bleu Oleander: oh far from where I am!
    Bertram Jacobus: yes. true, indeed. but only around 100 km away from yaku´s place (!) ;-)
    Bleu Oleander: you met each other in Malta?
    Bertram Jacobus: is there an explanation, why phoenix, arizona so often is said as fixed term ?
    Bertram Jacobus: and yes, we met there :-)
    Bleu Oleander: don't know why that would be
    Bleu Oleander: Phoenix is the 5th largest city in US
    Bertram Jacobus: whaow
    Bertram Jacobus: never had thought that !
    Bertram Jacobus: how many inhibitants ?
    Bleu Oleander: over 4 million
    Bertram Jacobus: okay. cologne is the 4th largest in germany - 1 million ... ;-)
    Bleu Oleander: I've never been to Germany .... some day maybe!
    Bertram Jacobus: yes. please visit us ! ;-)
    Bertram Jacobus: always welcome
    Bleu Oleander: would love to!
    Bertram Jacobus: would be very nice
    Bertram Jacobus: you know ? the autum retreat will be in stuttgart (germany)
    Bleu Oleander: I saw that
    Bleu Oleander: don't know if I will be able to do that
    Bleu Oleander: have to start saving up!
    Bertram Jacobus: okay - it´s where wol lives ...
    Bertram Jacobus: hehe -
    Bleu Oleander: how far is that from you?
    Bertram Jacobus: so i´ll miss the meetings in SF and halifax ... ;-)
    Bleu Oleander: I am thinking about SF .... pretty close to us
    Bleu Oleander: don't know if I can take a whole week though
    Bertram Jacobus: no comparison to the us or canada - about 400 km (!) ... ;-)
    Bertram Jacobus: i see. "but" i would say , it´s worth if one can arrange it
    Bleu Oleander: yes, very tempting!
    Bertram Jacobus: pema seems to be in very lucky situation : accompanies all the retreats (!) ... :-)
    Bleu Oleander: that's great that he does that!
    Bertram Jacobus: it´s a very nice experience to add such a rl experience to the sl pab´s ones ... :-9
    Bleu Oleander: very generous
    Bertram Jacobus: yes. but also his interest i guess -
    Bertram Jacobus: very lucky that he can do so
    Bleu Oleander: it's always lucky when you can do what you love to do :)
    Bertram Jacobus: and good and helpful for some or should i say many (?) ... :-)
    Bleu Oleander: yes
    Bertram Jacobus: it´s a real nice project, this pab ...
    Bleu Oleander: yes it is!
    Bertram Jacobus: :-))
    Bleu Oleander: very good for many people
    Bertram Jacobus: yes. for me for example ;-)
    Bleu Oleander: we took our group to meet Piet a year ago in Princeton
    Yakuzza Lethecus: back
    Bertram Jacobus: re yaku
    Bertram Jacobus: ah. great. how many people were you there bleu ?
    Bleu Oleander: http://www.spiritofthesenses.org/newyorkcity2008.htm
    Bleu Oleander: I think about a dozen
    Bertram Jacobus: sometimes i feel ashamed for my bad english, but the experience is : at least people understand me, mostly at least ... ;-)
    Bleu Oleander: you do fine
    Bertram Jacobus: and so i try to drop that ... ;-)
    Yakuzza Lethecus: you´re written english is really fine
    Bertram Jacobus: sometimes i feel : it is grammatical totally wrong but don´t know how to do better. also because sometimes it "must be fast" here ... and more and more - i simply write then, also the wrong forms ...
    Bertram Jacobus: and ty for the link bleu *click* it now ... :-)
    Bleu Oleander: it's a challenge to keep up with typing
    Bertram Jacobus: who are you on the picture bleu ? :-) the woman besides piet / pema ? ;-)
    Bleu Oleander: I am second from right
    Bertram Jacobus: from the viewers position - right ? ;-)
    Bleu Oleander: TH is to the left of Piet .... as you look at the picture
    Bertram Jacobus: a bit behind piet (?) ...
    Bleu Oleander: as you look at the picture
    Bertram Jacobus: already 2008 ...
    Bertram Jacobus: ok
    Bertram Jacobus: oh rl telephone
    Yakuzza Lethecus: my favorite picture is the dog on the couch watching in the garden :P
    Yakuzza Lethecus: i guess that´s not even princeton anymore :)
    Bleu Oleander: my bothers dog :)
    Bleu Oleander: not far from Princeton
    Bleu Oleander: we also went to NYC on that trip
    Bleu Oleander: we are going back to NYC/Princeton in May
    Bleu Oleander: well, I have to go for now .... hope to see you later if you can come to our salon
    Yakuzza Lethecus: yes, i will
    Yakuzza Lethecus: cya
    Bleu Oleander: cya
    Yakuzza Lethecus: bye bert
    Bleu Oleander: bye bert
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