Observing

Slave

When you really think this through, you can actually wonder why the writer was so surprised
to find those qualities of the human mind being spread over different area’s of the brain.
Whether the brain and it’s chemical processes define who we are
or whether the brain represents the more superficial and deeper imprints of our mind,
in both cases this is no less than what makes us into humans.
If we wouldn’t be able to observe our mind,
we would only be able to respond to our emotions
and follow the embedded patterns
that might end in unwanted actions.
At the same time though,
we also would not be able to understand the deepness of our trauma’s
and wouldn’t produce the thoughts
that make us feel that hurt over and over again,
thus enhancing bad feelings and reactions.

But either way,
not being able to observe our own emotions
would make us slaves of them and
the patterns or habits they produce,
or, we would be fully dependant to the ones learning us tricks,
though not understanding the meaning of them,
Maybe not even have any desire to do so.

Choice

Being able to observe ourselves is giving us choices.
Being able to have both processes running,
means we have the opportunity to make a start
in understanding our emotions and feelings.
We can ‘be’ our emotions
and at the same time observe them,
an unique combination of qualities.
We can also notice the emotions and feelings we see in others
or try to find the reflections in ourselves
of what we think might be going on with the other person.
That makes us able to respond to the other one
in a meaningful way,
or, as the writer himself states in another part of his book,
resonate with one another.

The relative ‘distance’ between the two qualities observing and feeling,
make us learn about ourselves and the world around us.
It can make us more angry
or make us feel more hurt,
gathering endless thoughts and feelings over it.
Or, it can put a smile on our face
when we see ourselves or others falling
back into the same habits we have been cursing just a moment before.
It can make us laugh
when we connect feelings and actions together
and make us fantasize about the possible outcomes.
Humor, self spot and laughter are human qualities,
where a dog following it’s own tail
will not see or understand the silliness of his own actions.

Meaning

It is the combination of those qualities
that gives meaning to our lives.
Through ages
people found out those qualities can be used to improve ourselves,
to direct ourselves in a certain direction,
giving sense to the sequence of choices we make.

If we were not able to observe,
science would not have been possible.
Empathie and the possible result of that,
as sympathie, would not be possible.
Though, it needs to be said
that hate would also not be able to develop itself,
since this quality of observation
can make us reconnect with angry feelings we have
and the actions we do,
doing that over and over again like a copier,
making the imprints in our mind deeper.
As it is also possible to disconnect ourselves
from our emotions, our sympathy and care for others.
The fact that dogs don’t repeat bad actions when not needed
give some people the feeling
they understand more about universal principles,
but it also makes them ignorant
of the choices they would be able to make.
They can’t choose another owner when needed,
we can choose to leave or change.

Dynamic

Through ages our mind has found ways to develop abilities in ourselves
that still amazes us as well as others.
Being able to make hard decisions at difficult times,
or to stretch the limits of our bodies and mind to great extend.
It’s the HUMAN mind that makes this possible,
and it can stretch far and wide,
surprising ourselves by time to time.

This slight difference
that separates observation and emotions in our brains,
though they can get connected within a time sequence we can hardly imagine,
that fast, we don’t even notice,...
is still what gives us our flexibility and our ability to grow,
or to let ourselves get captured in loops
of thoughts and feelings,
giving more and more meaning
to what holds us back.
It’s this ‘difference’,
that is making us dynamic,
give us some flexibility.

(important note for the ones struggling with deep felt pain:
don’t get me wrong here, I’m not saying it is easily done,
it takes understanding and work for years
to really being able to grasp this concept,
and still we make a lot of bad choices,
since a lot is embedded in such deep levels of ourselves,
it is not easily flowing into our consciousness,
and often people sigh “I thought I had worked through it”
and you did,
but to ‘work through things’ on all levels might be a lifelong task,
certainly if a trauma connects to hurtful situations coming from our childhood)

Mind

Our mind evolutionary wise contains of different levels,
some are very old and strong,
as our instinct to survive,
some are more complicated and less old,
using tools that gives us more and better chances to survive.
It shows how we can accomplish more when we start working in groups,
needing tools that can make us understand each other better,
feelings, attraction, sympathy, anger, etc.

Our actions become more complicated
and some learning can be done.

We learn and the rapid way our brains work,
it means we can learn a lot in a short amount of time,
the younger we are the more we do.
We learn how to deal with the world outside,
experimenting with actions that soon become patterns,
at the same time our brain working that fast,
we hardly know what happens,
making our habits more or less hard-wired.
Sadly though
the habits we need as a kid
are partly useless when we get older
and get passed our constant dependancy on others,
being able to live up to the full abilities of our brains,
the parts that gives us insight in our own patterns.
The part that understands
and is not directly connected to our emotions,
the part that can observe and think.

Patterns

Changing our patterns is a scary thing,
since we will need to act differently
in a situation we are so used to.
It places us in a new space,
and though we know the old pattern doesn’t work anymore,
is even getting in,
unconsciously we start to wonder what exactly is more appealing to us:
a pattern you understand as well as it’s outcome,
or to leave the pattern and create something new?
It’s the choice between not wanting something anymore,
but at least knowing what you’ve got and can expect,
and, not knowing what you’ve got
and not knowing you are going to like it or not.

It’s not easy to leave old patterns behind,
they might be more comfortable to us than we think,
even though we don't like them.
It's like that old car that is actually a pain to drive in,
with no air-conditioning, but still ...
Still, the qualities mentioned,
which makes it possible for us to ‘be’ emotion as well as observing it,
forms the basis of what gives us a meaning to life:
we are aware we can change,
we are aware we can understand,
we are aware we can improve ourselves.
To end with a quote
of which I have no knowledge of where it comes from:

The meaning of life is the meaning you give it