19-21 Maxine's appreciations

Perhaps in part due to this being my last Scribe note in the current cycle I looked with fondness upon the various available chatlogs for the window of 19-21 of May, and felt the conversations earnest, alive with inquiry, sharings, wonderings, and for some doubts as we explore  aspects of reality.  Several discussions from this period are excerpted below, and if this is a sampling of what occurs in a three day period just imagine what richness there is among our discussions ongoingly. Below please find some academic considerations, but mostly experience-based sharings, each inspiring in its own way; and perhaps for me at this point I was especially inspired by the explorations of letting go of time, including the 'now' as shared by genesis, which is the last excerpt.

Beginning with considerations of perception and letting go:

Eos Amaterasu: Goethe said that any object sufficently contemplated generates its organ of perception
Pema Pera: yes, he had an interesting angle
Pema Pera: we talked a lot about that in Kira Summerschools, ten years ago
Pema Pera: one of our Kira Faculty members, Arthur Zajonc, was deep into Goethe's approach
Fefonz Quan contemplate what does organ of perception mean. eye?
Pema Pera: it's on an energy level, not physical
Eos Amaterasu: Yes, or could be more subtle than that (an eye for certain kinds of art, for ex)
Pema Pera: or not primarily physical, though of course it also has a physical component
Fefonz Quan: eye, like 'develop the ear' for improvisation etc.
Pema Pera: yes
Eos Amaterasu: especially when we think of non-visual senses it gets closer
Pema Pera: having the right touch . . . .
Eos Amaterasu: the boundary gets blurrier
Fefonz Quan: i see, ok. like the body develops an antidote for certain viruses
Pila Mulligan: "The human beings knows himself only insofar as he knows the world; he perceives the world only in himself, and himself only in the world. Every new object, clearly seen, opens up a new organ of perception in us."
Pila Mulligan: more Goethe: "He who sees into the secret inner life of the plant, into the stirring of its powers, and observes how the flower gradually unfolds itself, sees the matter with quite different eyes — he knows what he sees."
Eos Amaterasu: that appreciation has a quality of freshness, or arising from openness
Eliza Madrigal: closer to alive
Pema Pera: yes, and there is a connection with time
Pema Pera: to really appreciate, we have to live in the presence
Pema Pera: but not the past-present-future present
Pema Pera: but a kind of timeless present
Pila Mulligan: Arthur Zajonc: "Goethe valued the rational as well as the empirical dimension of science. He sought to bring the rational element consciously into science, but not as an autonomous activity operating upon observation. Rather, he endeavored to embue seeing itself with the rational. The result was what he termed a 'gentle empiricism' possessed of perceptive seeing rather than mathematical techniques. "

And a bit further along in the same session

Pema Pera: I had an interesting experience two days ago, when I felt just to sleepy to sit for 20 minutes, well past midnight -- but I had made the commitment and did it anyway. At first, sleepiness seemed to prevent me to focus on appreciation, but then somehow something opened up, and the whole shlebang became appreciated and appreciation at the same time, all the obstacles, all the perceived limitations . . . .
Fefonz Quan: again, the time part didn't feel like working...
Pema Pera: yes, nature helps a lot
Eliza Madrigal: and where were you Pema.. not meaning where were you sitting... I mean your attention?
Eliza Madrigal: in that moment?
Pema Pera: at first it wandered around aimlessly, then it became one large ball of appreciation, and I naturally stopped fighting the wandering, it was just part of the symphony, so to speak
Pema Pera: appreciating the seeming lack of appreciation
Eliza Madrigal: hmm, nice :)

Check out the whole discussion at http://playasbeing.wik.is/Chat_Logs/2009/05/2009.05.19_19%3a00_-_Large_ball_of_appreciation 

At another session Pema and Eos again discuss aspects of the practice:

Pema Pera: in order to open up, by stopping and dropping, I find it helpful first to make the move to viewing everything as appearances
Pema Pera: we are normally so caught up in dealing in a pragmatic way with all we are immersed in
Pema Pera: things, ideas, wishes, hopes and fears
Pema Pera: but stepping back, and just watching them, like sitting on a bench in a park and watchng who/what moves by, helps
Pema Pera: or like watching a film, yes
aurel Miles nods
Eos Amaterasu: or being in SL
Pema Pera: yes, very much so
Eos Amaterasu: different kinds of immersivity

And further along:

Eos Amaterasu: appearance discloses Being
Pema Pera: yes!!
Eos Amaterasu: Yesterday we were talking about the space between the notes
Pema Pera: in and as each appearance
Eos Amaterasu: but also the notes are also space
Pema Pera: yes
Pema Pera: stripping all that we experience down to the bare bones fact of their appearance, their presence as appearances is the negative direction
Pema Pera: the positive direction is to see those in turn as presentations by Being
Pema Pera: but it is hard to let Being shine through as long as we haven't done the house cleaning first of the more negative step
Eos Amaterasu: Yes, that's an interesting aspect of the "discipline", or impeccability, of such a practice
Pema Pera: and as you said, our body and mind are also appearance -- and as such we ourselves are both presentations by Being and Being itself in a way that needs to be unpacked or seen
Pema Pera: so we "play as" Being in order to help see that

Again, the whole discussion can be found at http://playasbeing.wik.is/Chat_Logs/2009/05/2009.05.20_19%3a00_-_Body_and_mind_are_dropped%3f_Body_and_mind_are_indeed_dropped. 

And then the nearly ever-present question from ourselves and others is addressed by Fefonz and I offer an edited version of his question as it unfolded.  Still the issue of how to think about and respond to questions posed by varying earnest voices and interests is expressed:

Fefonz Quan: yesterday, sitting by the lunch table at the dining room with my wife's academic coleages, i was asked what we are doing in our SL meetings
Fefonz Quan: or more precisely, what 'project' are we working on as a team
Fefonz Quan: So i found my self wondering how to answer this question
sophia Placebo: is it a correct question ?
Fefonz Quan: well, when asked on a big table, it is hard to ask that one back...
sophia Placebo: but was is a correct question?
Fefonz Quan: well, if it was the people in my buddhist group, just for example, asking, they would phrase differently and i would answer differeently, and i would find it more easy to answer to that sort of audience
Fefonz Quan: but talking to academy people, infact their question is reasonable witin the way they see 'work', etc.

Find the whole discussion at http://playasbeing.wik.is/Chat_Logs/2009/05/2009.05.20_07%3a00_-_What_are_we_doing_Here%3f

And then an endearing admission about diversions away from the practice, how difficult it is at times, with some suggestions as to why (again excerpted):

Eliza Madrigal: This may sound funny... but sometimes I want to turn off the expanded view
Eliza Madrigal: I want to pretend I dont see what I see... and cut through something in the 'old way'
Eliza Madrigal: :)
Adams Rubble: we can step out and look from outside
Eliza Madrigal: yes... the movie analogy is helpful to seeing through the fear
Eliza Madrigal: seeing the changing contrasts...
Eliza Madrigal: letting them move by
Adams Rubble: :)
Eliza Madrigal: I'm thinking about times in my life when it was difficult to see another way to approach someone who was difficult...
Eliza Madrigal: so maybe I mirrored them, rather than trusting myself...
Eliza Madrigal: or I fell in line with a group rather than seeing more
Eliza Madrigal: all kinds of scenarios we grow up with
Eliza Madrigal: Most of the time, I have to say, I've fallen on the sword
Adams Rubble: the movie script
Susi Alcott: but you spoke about some choices; which kind
Eliza Madrigal: Hm... give me moment Susi....
Susi Alcott: I'm asking because you said that 'we all have made'
Eliza Madrigal: yes, because I think we all have stepped on other's hearts
Eliza Madrigal: without necessarily intending to
Eliza Madrigal: we didn't see them laying out there...
Eliza Madrigal: or weren't watching where we were going :)
Eliza Madrigal: those are still choices
Eliza Madrigal: thoughtlessness
Susi Alcott: that still does not tell about what kind of choices you spoke about
Eliza Madrigal: I'm sorry Susi, doing my best :)
Susi Alcott: ok
Eliza Madrigal: :)
Adams Rubble: I think Eliza is talking about the choices that are made by following the script

For the whole log please see  http://playasbeing.wik.is/Chat_Logs/2009/05/2009.05.21_07%3a00_-_Exposure 

And then an inspiring example of working with the 'no time' dimension

genesis Zhangsun: I recently about two months ago had an experience when I finally could
genesis Zhangsun: it was amazing, I myself have been working with the same "problem"
genesis Zhangsun: you tell yourself you are really in a dimension of "no time"
genesis Zhangsun: and yet you see the passing of time everywhere
genesis Zhangsun: like the water
genesis Zhangsun: like the birds chirping, like the cars going by
Fefonz Quan: yes, like reality hitting you on the head
genesis Zhangsun: yes and yet the idea that there really is no time makes sense on some intuitive level
genesis Zhangsun: thinking back to times when you felt like hours had passed and it was only minutes
genesis Zhangsun: or the other way around
Fefonz Quan: that is just differences in measurement, i find it very hard to jump from this to no time.
genesis Zhangsun: so here is how I began "resolving" the competition between my intution and my observation
enesis Zhangsun: shall we try a time experiment?
sophia Placebo: sure
Mickorod Renard: yes please
Fefonz Quan: yes
arabella Ella: ok
genesis Zhangsun: okay so lets get into a 9 second like mode
genesis Zhangsun: I will first describe
genesis Zhangsun: and then we can do it together
genesis Zhangsun: perhaps you have done this Fefonz
genesis Zhangsun: so when I say 9 second like mode
genesis Zhangsun: I mean dropping what we "have"
genesis Zhangsun: to see what we are
genesis Zhangsun: drop our self concepts, our perceptions, our prejudices, our assumptions as much as we can
genesis Zhangsun: just be
genesis Zhangsun: like being seeing
genesis Zhangsun: drop the you grasping to see
genesis Zhangsun: okay so starting from there (may take a couple minutes at least always does for me)
genesis Zhangsun: okay now drop the past
genesis Zhangsun: bring forth the images that lurk in the background
genesis Zhangsun: of all the things you were just doing
genesis Zhangsun: a minute ago, an hour ago, a year ago
genesis Zhangsun: the past
genesis Zhangsun: can you see somehow the unreality of it
genesis Zhangsun: that it isn't here now?
genesis Zhangsun: that you are not bound by that
genesis Zhangsun: it doesn't define you
genesis Zhangsun: so return to now
genesis Zhangsun: do you feel yourself anticipating the next moment?
genesis Zhangsun: thinking about the future?
genesis Zhangsun: drop the future
genesis Zhangsun: collect together the images again- the lists, the planning
genesis Zhangsun: where you think you should be in one hour
genesis Zhangsun: what should happen the next minute
genesis Zhangsun: drop that
genesis Zhangsun: so return to now
genesis Zhangsun: water falling, birds chirping
genesis Zhangsun: looking at your screen
genesis Zhangsun: now drop the now
genesis Zhangsun: what do you see?
genesis Zhangsun: yes dropping the now I also feel is the trickiest
genesis Zhangsun: being now is already tough enough
arabella Ella: yes
genesis Zhangsun: I feel pretty good lighter if I can drop the past and the future
genesis Zhangsun: I sort of ask myself why drop the now?
arabella Ella nods
Fefonz Quan: yes, the future was easiest for me, past much harder
arabella Ella: and not just why but how too
Fefonz Quan: drop the now - made me feel dizzy, i didn't understand what that means
sophia Placebo: its like following the water wave -single one- and moving with it, so no now because now is ongoing , no past because im still with the same wave no future because the wave would still be a wave
genesis Zhangsun: yes sophia that is a nice image
arabella Ella: lovely way of describing it
genesis Zhangsun: I can decribe what very strong experience I had with dropping the now
Mickorod Renard: so the now is still there but only a moment of ever recuring new nows?
genesis Zhangsun: yes one way to think about it mick
sophia Placebo: no , no now as a fixed point in the vedio tape ,
genesis Zhangsun: even to create a packaging by calling it "now" is limiting
sophia Placebo: it is just moving wave from no whare towards no whare
Mickorod Renard: a bit like a fly hitting the front of a moving train
genesis Zhangsun: so here is my experience
genesis Zhangsun: I was at the beach really "trying" to get this time thing
sophia Placebo: assuming that the fly is blind , yes or that the train is in the outerspace
genesis Zhangsun: I have been really "trying" for awhile
genesis Zhangsun: in a non "trying" way ;)
genesis Zhangsun: so I am at the beach
genesis Zhangsun: looking at the waves
genesis Zhangsun: and I go through this exploration
genesis Zhangsun: I drop the past
genesis Zhangsun: I feel that I can do that somehow
genesis Zhangsun: when I recall the images of my past
genesis Zhangsun: I can recognize that they are just pictures
genesis Zhangsun: they really have no bearing on reality
genesis Zhangsun: or very little
genesis Zhangsun: just slices
genesis Zhangsun: shadows
genesis Zhangsun: I look at the water again
genesis Zhangsun: I return to now
genesis Zhangsun: I can feel the spray of the waves
genesis Zhangsun: the freshness of the air in and out of my nostrils
genesis Zhangsun: the birds squawking
genesis Zhangsun: sand beneath my feet
genesis Zhangsun: I am in the "now"
genesis Zhangsun: I think about the future
genesis Zhangsun: I can already picture myself
genesis Zhangsun: walking away from this spot
genesis Zhangsun: returning to my car
genesis Zhangsun: driving away
genesis Zhangsun: back home
genesis Zhangsun: I can see all that
genesis Zhangsun: and yet I stop and remember that none of that may happen
genesis Zhangsun: that it really is figment of my imagination
genesis Zhangsun: I drop the future
genesis Zhangsun: I return to the waves
genesis Zhangsun: I am in the now
genesis Zhangsun: and it is pleasant there in the now
genesis Zhangsun: and yet I can see that "now"
genesis Zhangsun: is a limiting measurement just like past and just like future
genesis Zhangsun: I am still trying in a very subtle way to hold on
genesis Zhangsun: to something
genesis Zhangsun: so I drop the now
genesis Zhangsun: and I felt the world in a new way
genesis Zhangsun: not as time
genesis Zhangsun: but as energy
genesis Zhangsun: the waves lapping on the shore
genesis Zhangsun: they were not measures of time
genesis Zhangsun: minutes passing
genesis Zhangsun: but energy
genesis Zhangsun: time as energy unfolding space
genesis Zhangsun: revealing something
genesis Zhangsun: revealing nothing
genesis Zhangsun: it felt like blood rushing back into my veins
genesis Zhangsun: everything was "alive" with time as energy
genesis Zhangsun: it was a view of the world going from small nicely bite sized morsels
genesis Zhangsun: artificial packaging of time
genesis Zhangsun: to something raw, living, oxygenated
genesis Zhangsun: thats it

The whole discussion is available at

http://playasbeing.wik.is/Chat_Logs/2009/05/2009.05.20_13%3a00_Time_Exploration

And so, dear reader, perhaps you share my appreciation for these glimpses into the minds and hearts of those involved in earnest explorations into various aspects of reality.  It has been a pleasure, as well as a time-consuming task to read and to gather the nuggets from these explorations.  But one I am so pleased to have engaged in for my learning has and continues to be immense.