2016.02.07 13:00 - Cuba libre & wu wei

The Guardian for this meeting was Aphrodite Macbain. The comments are by Aphrodite Macbain.

Catrinamonblue Resident: Hi Aph :)
Aphrodite Macbain: Hey Cat!
Aphrodite Macbain: How was Cuba?
Catrinamonblue Resident: how are things?
Catrinamonblue Resident: lol :) Cuba was fun :)
Aphrodite Macbain: yayy
Aphrodite Macbain: what did you do?
Catrinamonblue Resident: not much, beach bumming :)
Aphrodite Macbain: Did u snorkle?
Catrinamonblue Resident: no. Yann doesn't swim and I didn't feel like going :)
Aphrodite Macbain: too bad
Catrinamonblue Resident: Had fun looking for shells and I swam in the waves :)
Aphrodite Macbain: nice
Catrinamonblue Resident: and hanging out in the lobby drinking and chatting with people :)
Aphrodite Macbain: :-) I hope you had a mijito or two
Catrinamonblue Resident: I don't really like mojito's but had lots of rum and coke :)
Aphrodite Macbain: too sweet for me :-)
Catrinamonblue Resident: :)
Aphrodite Macbain: did u bring back any shells?
Catrinamonblue Resident: Yes we brought back lots of shells :)
Catrinamonblue Resident: a friend wanted a bunch for a jar he's filling
Aphrodite Macbain: pretty
Aphrodite Macbain: When I was there, I spent a lot of time sketching the shells I found
Aphrodite Macbain: such a variety!
Aphrodite Macbain: ah
Catrinamonblue Resident: yes :) some very lovely shells :)
Aphrodite Macbain: what did you think of Cuba?
Aphrodite Macbain: nice mix of people aren't they?
Catrinamonblue Resident: It's an interesting place :) the people are sweet and supper friendly :)
Catrinamonblue Resident: Met a girl I went to high school with on the bus from the airport to the resort :)
Catrinamonblue Resident: such a small world :)
Aphrodite Macbain: omg
Aphrodite Macbain: Did you give away the stuff you brought?
Catrinamonblue Resident: Yes we gave the stuff we brought to the maid and a few others there :)
Aphrodite Macbain: They must have been happy
Catrinamonblue Resident: yes they were :) it was so amazing how happy they were for such things.
Aphrodite Macbain: The trade embargo by the US has really hurt them
Catrinamonblue Resident: and yet it was the little things we take for granted that they have a hard time getting
Catrinamonblue Resident: like pens...
Aphrodite Macbain: I know - Bics
Catrinamonblue Resident: we forgot to bring one with us to write with and it was so hard to find one...
Aphrodite Macbain: they were a hot commodity when I was there in the 80s!
Aphrodite Macbain: lol
Catrinamonblue Resident: we ended up going to the plaza Americana to buy one from a tourist shop
Catrinamonblue Resident: crazy
Aphrodite Macbain: did you not bring pens with you to give away?
Catrinamonblue Resident: yes :) didn't want to open up the package to take one, thought it would be easy enough to find one
Aphrodite Macbain: pens and bluejeans....
Catrinamonblue Resident: :)
Aphrodite Macbain: will you go back?
Catrinamonblue Resident: yes :)
Catrinamonblue Resident: going to take the kids next year :) it will be a good experience for them :)
Aphrodite Macbain: great idea
Aphrodite Macbain: It's not too expensive, is it?
Catrinamonblue Resident: not too bad, it was $1,100 each this time
Aphrodite Macbain: including hotel?
Catrinamonblue Resident: will have to see, the kids will have to help out with some money towards it...
Catrinamonblue Resident: all inclusive, hotel food drink everything
Aphrodite Macbain: excellent

What's wu wei?
Catrinamonblue Resident: to change the subject :)
Catrinamonblue Resident: I have been reading the wiki this morning :)
Aphrodite Macbain: nods
Catrinamonblue Resident: got caught up with Wu Wei
Aphrodite Macbain: :-)
Aphrodite Macbain: what do you think?
Catrinamonblue Resident: and reading various sessions about it
Catrinamonblue Resident: I'm curious about others experience
Catrinamonblue Resident: the sessions seem intent on creating a definition
Aphrodite Macbain: Do you get the bit about getting out of your own way?
Catrinamonblue Resident: not so much sharing a personal experience with such
Catrinamonblue Resident: yes I think I do
Aphrodite Macbain: I suppose people want to know that they are all talking about the same thing
Aphrodite Macbain: need to agree on what is being discussed
Catrinamonblue Resident: maybe I'm a bit weird but I find for myself that examples give better definitions
Aphrodite Macbain: It's hard being a person listening to a new concept - hearing all the different explanations
Aphrodite Macbain: nods. yes- examples are very useful
Catrinamonblue Resident: an idea of I have experienced or not experienced the same to put it into context
Aphrodite Macbain: nods
Aphrodite Macbain: For me, it reduces down to becoming aware of what is preventing me from seeing things more fully
Aphrodite Macbain: what is stopping me from having a wider vision
Catrinamonblue Resident: how do you know you are not seeing things fully?
Aphrodite Macbain: my prejudices
Aphrodite Macbain: because I don't understand other people when they try and explain and criticizing what people are saying rather than accepting it as part of their truth
Catrinamonblue Resident: is it during or after that you realize you are not seeing things
Aphrodite Macbain: during
Aphrodite Macbain: I can be surprised or frustrated
Catrinamonblue Resident: I don't mean to pry or anything, I'm just very curious. It also stems from the question of  "is my experience normal?"
Aphrodite Macbain: Aphrodite Macbain: I'm sure it is Cat
Catrinamonblue Resident: mmmmmm I think we all do that.... I have for sure......
Aphrodite Macbain: that's what I understand as "getting in our own way"
Catrinamonblue Resident: it's hard sometimes to see that the other person feels they are telling the truth even when I may not see it as truth
Aphrodite Macbain: we are blinkered by our prejudices
Aphrodite Macbain: nods
Aphrodite Macbain: good way of putting it - everybody tells their own truth
Catrinamonblue Resident: I'm always drawn to the saying that the truth is a three edged sword
Catrinamonblue Resident: his side, her side and the truth
Aphrodite Macbain: smiles
Aphrodite Macbain: I'm not sure there is one absolute truth
Aphrodite Macbain: except maybe in mathematics
Catrinamonblue Resident: yes, our own truth is in essence who we are
Aphrodite Macbain: yes
Aphrodite Macbain: and it can change
Aphrodite Macbain: the way we change
Catrinamonblue Resident: oh yes :) and does every day
Aphrodite Macbain: Although some things remain constant for us
Catrinamonblue Resident: dna :)
Aphrodite Macbain: I keep a journal, a diary
Catrinamonblue Resident: I do that on and off
Aphrodite Macbain: and I'm amazed how I keep saying the same things over and over
Catrinamonblue Resident: nods
Aphrodite Macbain: so some attitudes stay the same
Catrinamonblue Resident: :)
Aphrodite Macbain: I also notice my truth depends on my moods
Catrinamonblue Resident: yes
Aphrodite Macbain: pessimistic, optimistic,
Catrinamonblue Resident: :) I tend to be rather optimistic :)
Aphrodite Macbain: I think emotions get in the way as well but are also important

Decision making
Aphrodite Macbain: How do you make big decisions?
Catrinamonblue Resident: years ago I just did it without much thought...
Catrinamonblue Resident: now
Catrinamonblue Resident: I tend to sit back
Catrinamonblue Resident: and wait
Catrinamonblue Resident: and feel
Aphrodite Macbain: Do you discuss it with others?
Catrinamonblue Resident: and somehow with discussion with others
Aphrodite Macbain: or make a list of pros and cons?
Catrinamonblue Resident: it forms
Catrinamonblue Resident: and then happens
Aphrodite Macbain: nods
Catrinamonblue Resident: I used to do the pros and cons
Catrinamonblue Resident: not helpful
Aphrodite Macbain: :-)
Aphrodite Macbain: It's interesting to read those lists a few years later
Catrinamonblue Resident: It's funny, I'm thinking about the derision to move in with Yann
Aphrodite Macbain: I think we go with our gut- our feelings being based on past experiences
Catrinamonblue Resident: and there really was never any real: this is the choice
Aphrodite Macbain: decision ... not derision :-)
Catrinamonblue Resident: opps spelling is not my strong point :)
Aphrodite Macbain: lol
Aphrodite Macbain: it makes for funny mistakes sometimes!
Catrinamonblue Resident: it was just a process of discussion
Aphrodite Macbain: with whom?
Catrinamonblue Resident: with Yann mostly but with friends as well
Aphrodite Macbain: what about the kids?
Catrinamonblue Resident: yes with them as well, which is why it's now and not over a year ago when I wanted :)
Aphrodite Macbain: ?
Catrinamonblue Resident: I had to make sure everything was going to be good for them first
Aphrodite Macbain: ah so that was part of the decision making process
Catrinamonblue Resident: yes :)
Aphrodite Macbain: :-)
Catrinamonblue Resident: I guess I'm not being very linear in my explanation of the process :) the kids have been involved in every step of the way :) That's the main reason for waiting longer than I wanted :)
Aphrodite Macbain: Waiting and seeing is often the wisest approach. :-) I am very impatient so it's hard for me to do that. I lose courage or impetus if I leave things too long.
Catrinamonblue Resident: waiting is very hard :)
Catrinamonblue Resident: I didn't want to but had no choice for the sake of the kids
Aphrodite Macbain: nods
Aphrodite Macbain: what were you waiting for?
Aphrodite Macbain: an indication from them that it would be OK?
Catrinamonblue Resident: issues to settle out with my ex.....
Catrinamonblue Resident: the kids were happy for me. :) They only want for their parents to be happy
Aphrodite Macbain: :-)
Aphrodite Macbain: It makes them happy, yes
Catrinamonblue Resident: :)
Aphrodite Macbain: As they grow older, they will become more understanding and less vulnerable, I guess
Catrinamonblue Resident: perhaps they will, it's hard to say

Catrinamonblue Resident: so back to wu wei :)
Aphrodite Macbain: What do you like about wu wei? (if u do like it!)
Catrinamonblue Resident: I like the idea of the universe doing what it needs to do
Catrinamonblue Resident: :)
Catrinamonblue Resident: and of allowing that doing to happen
Aphrodite Macbain: yes- we are all rather insignificant in the scheme of things
Catrinamonblue Resident: :)
Catrinamonblue Resident: a blip, a bubble, a drop of water
Catrinamonblue Resident: a pebble of sand on the beach of life :)
Catrinamonblue Resident: and yet we each feel we are the center of the universe
Aphrodite Macbain: But there are always things we need to resist or stand up for...the challenge is to decide when we should
Catrinamonblue Resident: yes I agree :)
Catrinamonblue Resident: the sense I had from the sessions
Catrinamonblue Resident: was that wu wei is not "no action"
Catrinamonblue Resident: but "allowing action"
Aphrodite Macbain: I try and think about my immediate universe, my community, and see if there are things I need to do within it
Catrinamonblue Resident: :)
Aphrodite Macbain: sometimes a simple action by myself can shift things
Catrinamonblue Resident: yes exactly, the right action at the right time
Aphrodite Macbain: Right now I'm having a terrible time with the residents of my co-op
Catrinamonblue Resident: :( oh dear
Aphrodite Macbain: there is a lot of anger and frustration
Aphrodite Macbain: about the fact that someone sanding the basement floor has put dust containing lead all over the basement area
Catrinamonblue Resident: :( that's not good
Aphrodite Macbain: People have become quite vicious
Catrinamonblue Resident: fearful
Aphrodite Macbain: I'm trying to act constructively
Aphrodite Macbain: but it's very stressful
Catrinamonblue Resident: nods
Aphrodite Macbain: I can't just "let this go" - accept "no action"
Catrinamonblue Resident: it's a hard place to be in
Aphrodite Macbain: I try to take responsibility for helping the process to resolve itself
Aphrodite Macbain: nods
Aphrodite Macbain: It's using up all my energy :(
Catrinamonblue Resident: I wish I had some advice to offer but I don't... just hang in there
Aphrodite Macbain: :-) thanks
Catrinamonblue Resident: it will eventually get resolved
Aphrodite Macbain: I will. It will.
Aphrodite Macbain: I am trying to do "the right thing" though I'm not sure what that is
Aphrodite Macbain: :-)
Catrinamonblue Resident: I'm sure it'll work out in the end....
Catrinamonblue Resident: it's just hard to get there

Aphrodite Macbain: Now I need to go to the library. I'm taking out a book on Tuscany :-)
Catrinamonblue Resident: :) nice.. planning for your trip?
Aphrodite Macbain: where I'll be in May
Catrinamonblue Resident: yay!!! :)
Aphrodite Macbain: part of my University course...3 whole weeks! yayyy indeed
Catrinamonblue Resident: wow that sounds fun :)
Catrinamonblue Resident: enjoy
Aphrodite Macbain: :-)
Aphrodite Macbain: ciao bella
Aphrodite Macbain: nice talking with you
Catrinamonblue Resident: bfn :)
Catrinamonblue Resident: yes
Aphrodite Macbain: bye