2016.09.08 13:00 - TSK Session: Given Being's Endless Play...

The Guardians for this meeting were Bleu, Mick, and Eliza. This was the last official TSK "report style" session, and was intimate' & sweet - just three.
Still, I hope that more can attend our special closing session next week, in the skybox retreat space. 

For reference: 2016.09.08 - Being

And the whole exploration: Time, Space, and Knowledge

Mickorod Renard: hiya
Eliza Madrigal: Hi :)
Mickorod Renard: howz the flu?
Eliza Madrigal: much better, but left with residual weakness.... not able to quite catch up with myself yet
Mickorod Renard: owwww
Eliza Madrigal: thus, my last week's report is not written up!
Mickorod Renard: hey, i shouldnt worry about that
Eliza Madrigal: you can imagine how maddening this is... I've become so unreliable
Mickorod Renard: no you haven't, not to me..or even us

Eliza Madrigal: but last week's session was beautiful, Mick.... love
Eliza Madrigal: thanks for that
Mickorod Renard: I didnt like it,,I felt quite bad about being too vocal
Eliza Madrigal: I know that feeling well, but you shouldn't at all
Eliza Madrigal: it was interesting and comforting to read
Eliza Madrigal: 'heart of the matter'

Mickorod Renard: there seemed long periods of silence..so i felt compelled to fill them in
Eliza Madrigal: :) happens to me too
Eliza Madrigal: there is some pressure to 'host' :))
Mickorod Renard: yes, strange to notice that but there is
Eliza Madrigal: but also, I'm aware that the sessions are winding down and some weeks feel we've talked a lot, and some weeks feel we've not scratched surface
Eliza Madrigal: appreciate the time, though, and the glimpses of everyone's hearts
Mickorod Renard: thats true,,and each week in some way feels like its delivered short of some massive revelation
Eliza Madrigal smiles, yes that's the feeling
Mickorod Renard: :)
Eliza Madrigal: skirting edges

Eliza Madrigal: did you finish the reading?
Mickorod Renard: I have written something for today
Mickorod Renard: yes
Eliza Madrigal: excellent!
Mickorod Renard: its a bit odd but I think fitting

--BELL--

Eliza Madrigal: :) best reports are a bit odd, imo
Eliza Madrigal giggles
Mickorod Renard: he he
Bleu Oleander: hi Mick, Eliza :)
Mickorod Renard: Hi Bleu
Eliza Madrigal: Hi Bleu :) Look very pretty
Bleu Oleander: ty :)
Bleu Oleander: rummaging through my old inventory :)
Eliza Madrigal: :) always fun
Mickorod Renard: looks very nice
Bleu Oleander: old "me"
Bleu Oleander: funny how it brings with it old feelings :)
Eliza Madrigal: reminders of old friends? old patterns?
Bleu Oleander: yes, different feelings of me-ness
Eliza Madrigal: :)

Eliza Madrigal: we should give just a few minutes, since we may be a small group today, but let's see
Bleu Oleander: sure
Eliza Madrigal: I'll pop away right at the end of the hour also, since doggo is at a daycare and evidently not doing so great
Bleu Oleander: awww
Mickorod Renard: oh, why is that?
Eliza Madrigal: my daughter is working there now and they wanted her to bring him in
Mickorod Renard: ah great
Eliza Madrigal: to play with another dachshund
Eliza Madrigal: but he's not happy :)
Bleu Oleander: dachshund rivalries
Eliza Madrigal: he will need more time
Eliza Madrigal: more visits
Eliza Madrigal: :)
Bleu Oleander: good to socialize him
Eliza Madrigal: yes
Mickorod Renard: the last kennel I sent my dog,,a few year ago,,he went crazy,,I havnt let him stay anywhere since
Eliza Madrigal: he's a mamma's dog lol
Bleu Oleander: :)
Eliza Madrigal: Aw, Mick. I guess one never knows until trying
Mickorod Renard: he is now 17 years old
Eliza Madrigal: oh :)
Mickorod Renard: I darnt try another
Eliza Madrigal: not with him!

We start

Eliza Madrigal: Well, shall we embark upon this lastish session?
Mickorod Renard: ok
Eliza Madrigal: I'm glad you were able to write something Mick
Eliza Madrigal listens
Mickorod Renard: he he
Bleu Oleander: sure
Mickorod Renard: I guess thats my prompt
Eliza Madrigal: cue Mick
Mickorod Renard: ok 2 secs

Mickorod Renard: I felt quite negative after last weeks tsk, something to do with myself I think and perhaps also my inability to articulate myself well. Life has been quite mixed up for me recently and yet here I am comprehending in some way a wonderful thing and yet also unable to control my feelings of despair when I see and feel sadness around me.

Mickorod Renard: I picked my granddaughter up from school and took her home, we played at 'stuff' she bounced on a trampoline and we laughed. Eventually she wanted to go out and i suggested we went for a walk opposite my home and we passed through the church grounds into the fields beyond, looking for sheep and cows.

Mickorod Renard: My granddaughter skipped and hopped over the grass shrieking and giggling and we picked blackberries and made mooing and baaa noises at the animals in the fields. Here was a beautiful place, I am so lucky, the sky gloriously blue and huge, swallows flirting around, a good breeze that made everything feel a little crazy. I looked at the hill which had been farmed in such a way that it truly looked as if someone had made a patchwork quilt to cover it

Mickorod Renard: I watched her and appreciated the innocence she enjoyed and that innocence that gave her immunity from daily worries. I watched and enjoyed that which I could appreciate and that she was oblivious to it. I knew how I could taste that same feeling again and desired it. I felt the vastness and oneness of life and intoxicated myself in it all...we walked back home...and played some more.

Mickorod Renard: I read the last bit of tsk...and I thought...maybe I do understand....but I need to manage myself better..Altruism was mentioned..I am sure we talked of that earlier in the sessions....as we did many of the other words that I now read. I am annoyed at my lack of grace and feel like a jekyll and hyde character.
Mickorod Renard: done

 

Eliza Madrigal: what a beautiful report, Mick... exquisite and raw 
Mickorod Renard: thank you
Bleu Oleander: yes :)
Bleu Oleander: we can probably all be jekyll's and hyde's at many given points :)
Mickorod Renard: its funny how one can almost hold onto the tsk thing,,yet it seems so slippery in everyday life
Eliza Madrigal: tasting the wide sky and innocent play, yet also feeling 'falling short'
Eliza Madrigal: indeed Bleu!
Eliza Madrigal: and no one can give an objective view really, so have to find solace in a different way?
Mickorod Renard: its funny, I dont think one could appreciate something without the contrast of negativity..but that seemeds like its taboo
Bleu Oleander: we are embedded in reality and have a unique grasp of a tiny portion of the larger reality
Eliza Madrigal: dark side of the moon
Eliza Madrigal nods Bleu

Eliza Madrigal: were you able to read this week Bleu, or have another angle on the end of TSK? :)
Mickorod Renard: yes bleu
Bleu Oleander: I was and do
Eliza Madrigal: nice
Bleu Oleander: :)

--BELL--

Bleu Oleander: I was inspired by the end
Bleu Oleander: “Given Being’s endless play, there is no fixed way to ‘get’ this fulfillment, since it is too ‘near’ to ‘get’, and is so ever-present that no particular approach is necessary of possible.”
Bleu Oleander: I think we find the TSK ideas appealing or not, because of other philosophical biases we carry around in our heads, our unique receptors.
Bleu Oleander: we had a salon recently where the subject for discussion was “translation”
Bleu Oleander: the presenter pointed out that listening is translation, and translation is interpretation.
Mickorod Renard: listens
Eliza Madrigal: hm
Bleu Oleander: we have a need to understand, to translate anyone who isn’t like we are
Bleu Oleander: the presenter defined intimacy as a confident, quasi immediate translation
Bleu Oleander: I recently re-read "the Great Gatsby" again
Eliza Madrigal: :)
Bleu Oleander: and was caught by this quote: “I was within and without, simultaneously enchanted and repelled by the inexhaustible variety of life.”
Bleu Oleander: somehow, TSK fits within the inexhaustible variety of life for me
Mickorod Renard: i can relate to that
Bleu Oleander: a "bow" for me
Bleu Oleander: done :)

Mickorod Renard: very nice Bleu
Mickorod Renard: thank you
Eliza Madrigal: yes, wonderful... and so fitting with mick's observations
Bleu Oleander: yes :)
Mickorod Renard: it reasures me some..that I am not alone
Eliza Madrigal nods... and a sense of glimpsing one's or humanity's creatureness and "divinity" at play on the same stage...and there is a confusion that is also the wonder
Bleu Oleander: endless forms most beautiful
Eliza Madrigal: Being's endless play
Mickorod Renard: yes, if one could surrender to the confusion and enjoy it as an art peice it could be wonnderful
Eliza Madrigal: that's something that came up in the last chapter...
Eliza Madrigal: appreciation and receptiveness as though Art
Mickorod Renard: I think it did ,,i was looking at my words and worrying a bit
Eliza Madrigal: worrying?
Mickorod Renard: yes, plagirism
Mickorod Renard: he he
Eliza Madrigal: :)
Bleu Oleander: :)

Eliza Madrigal: when with your granddaughter... that 'translating' and listening seems apt
Eliza Madrigal: then you come here to share with us and there is a gap in 'interpretation'
Eliza Madrigal: or the feeling of a gap
Mickorod Renard: yes, she is a medium in a way
Eliza Madrigal: although I can immerse in your setting nicely :) the way you describe
Bleu Oleander: levels of translation

Eliza Madrigal: it makes me a little embarrassed for the technicalness of the way I began writing my reports the last week... the reports that haven't made it onto the computer :)
Mickorod Renard: there is a dificulty in relating ones understanding,,if that is what it is
Mickorod Renard: I feel we need tehnicalmness
Eliza Madrigal: but when one goes to share, there is a measure of what they think 'other' might be receptive to, etc... such an interesting process, what we've been doing all this time, with greater and lesser levels of focus along the way
Mickorod Renard: to ground it a bit
Eliza Madrigal: hm, sometimes... yet the last chapters were 'blissful' and strange to write about nectar and bliss and elixir in a technical way? :))
Bleu Oleander: we are never really sure of the receptiveness of our ideas with others
Eliza Madrigal: always some vulnerablity
Bleu Oleander: yes

Mickorod Renard: yes, its funny that I often refer to an old dream I had had,,to try and explain something,,but that dream only means something to me
Eliza Madrigal: well a dream can be vivid
Eliza Madrigal: like a story book
Bleu Oleander: stories are great explainers
Mickorod Renard: yes, sadly I dont have them profound ones anymore
Bleu Oleander: I found so much in Gatsby ... took me in and surprised me :)
Mickorod Renard: I also wonder whether it would be a good idea to have a session to discuss our understanding of certain words
Eliza Madrigal: and sometimes dreams give us away in unplanned ways...so sharing them can be a profound leap of faith/trust
Mickorod Renard: I must have a go at that book Bleu
Eliza Madrigal: what comes to mind, Bleu?
Bleu Oleander: well for one, the green light at the end of the dock, an enchanted object
Bleu Oleander: a symbol of Gatsby's self-created dream
Bleu Oleander: and factual truth that finally crushes him and his dream
Eliza Madrigal nods... a story of Daisy he had nurtured from a few bright memories?
Mickorod Renard: was that in his imagination?
Bleu Oleander: yes
Bleu Oleander: the light was real
Mickorod Renard: ty
Bleu Oleander: but the dream was his imagination
Eliza Madrigal: he situated his life across from hers
Mickorod Renard: was the dock real?
Bleu Oleander: yes
Mickorod Renard: ok..ty
Bleu Oleander: we all create our own self stories
Mickorod Renard: I saw the film years ago,,forgotten content
Bleu Oleander: sometimes they are out of sync with reality
Eliza Madrigal: the robert redford version Mick?
Bleu Oleander: we get ahead of ourselves :)
Mickorod Renard: for sure..I have always tried to analize mine,,as my dad always refered to people being walter mitties
Mickorod Renard: yes it was Rob Redford
Bleu Oleander: I'll have to rent that one again
Eliza Madrigal: perhaps reality changes faster than we can keep up with? faster than we can communicate?
Bleu Oleander: I think so
Eliza Madrigal: so we are always with gaps... like frozen screen shots we then link together and spin

Bleu Oleander:

“The truth was that Jay Gatsby, of West Egg, Long Island, sprang from his Platonic conception of himself. He was a son of God—a phrase which, if it means anything, means just that—and he must be about His Father’s business, the service of a vast, vulgar, and meretricious beauty. So he invented just the sort of Jay Gatsby that a seventeen year old boy would be likely to invent, and to this conception he was faithful to the end.”

Mickorod Renard: Strangely enough, I now look back at my life and am shocked at its diversity and what i have done and experienced
Eliza Madrigal: Gatsby was naive... which is hard to reconcile with what we think of as powerful
Mickorod Renard: wow, thanks Bleu
Bleu Oleander: was caught in his "Platonic conception of himself" ... love that idea even though its ultimately sad
Eliza Madrigal: and some feeling of, "if I just do a, b, c..." then I can capture the bliss
Eliza Madrigal: yes
Bleu Oleander: yes

Eliza Madrigal: ah, feeling thoughtful now... thinking of many reunions of friendships that have happened over the last few years, and the contrast of how we saw things
Eliza Madrigal: some on pedestals, others 'bad guys'
Eliza Madrigal: and the refreshment of feeling equally human in the face of life :)
Mickorod Renard: :)
Bleu Oleander: many shades of humanity
Eliza Madrigal: but also, always the feeling of also, seeing only a few angles or parts
Mickorod Renard: that is so true
Eliza Madrigal: frustration of that
Bleu Oleander: we can never see it all in its totality
Bleu Oleander: we are caught within

Eliza Madrigal: I want to recommend an interesting podcast up the last few weeks, that really fit nicely with "great knowledge' and ways of knowing....
Eliza Madrigal: I'd never heard of this philosopher... [added: Emanuel Levinas]
Eliza Madrigal: http://www.partiallyexaminedlife.com...145-1-levinas/

Mickorod Renard: I often remind myself that other folk also are complex beings..which I also often forget
Mickorod Renard: thankyou
Bleu Oleander: thanks, will listen later
Eliza Madrigal: a little out of rhythm here, sorry, but I didn't want to forget
Eliza Madrigal: :)
Bleu Oleander: we always think we are more complex than others :)
Mickorod Renard: yes
Eliza Madrigal: I feel, not more complex, but somewhat locked up
Mickorod Renard: scary to sit in a busy mal and think about what everyone is thinking
Bleu Oleander: locked up?
Eliza Madrigal: perhaps a bit of what Mick describes at times...unable to articulate
Eliza Madrigal: as though the timing is always off....
Eliza Madrigal: and I push through that feeling stubbornly, but then the result is messier than the impression of what I longed to convey, to connect
Eliza Madrigal: I want to be in sync and in group and orchestra
Eliza Madrigal: :)

Mickorod Renard: I find there is a temptation to accept that oneself is the centre of the universe
Eliza Madrigal: or if you would only get it right everything else would be okay? lol
Bleu Oleander: I really liked the idea of intimacy as a confident, quasi immediate translation
Eliza Madrigal: immediacy
Bleu Oleander: when the idea is translated immediately
Bleu Oleander: no need to push in a way
Bleu Oleander: the other just gets it
Eliza Madrigal: that seems to surpass verbal communication
Bleu Oleander: can, yes
Mickorod Renard: I could do with an example
Mickorod Renard: he he
Eliza Madrigal: :)
Bleu Oleander: the intimacy one has with a good friend
Mickorod Renard: yes
Bleu Oleander: a closeness
Bleu Oleander: that needs no space between words
Mickorod Renard: ok,,think I have it now
Eliza Madrigal: it can feel so lonely when one expects a close friend to 'get' something or see something and, for whatever reason, they don't...
Bleu Oleander: yes
Eliza Madrigal: or vice versa... it is like intimacy moves
Mickorod Renard: or worse, they misinterpret
Bleu Oleander: its like a mis-firing
Eliza Madrigal: can't 'expect' it somewhere
Eliza Madrigal: yes

Eliza Madrigal: seems near to what buddhists describe with 'transmission' also
Eliza Madrigal: in the exercise about the energetic channels.. 34? there is a description of a 'feeling' of nectar...
Eliza Madrigal: and I had that experience, once, but always relegated it to the setting... of a retreat with others and lots of quiet, nature...
Eliza Madrigal: but when I saw it in TSK, I realized I'd done that... like, sectioned it off
Eliza Madrigal: given it too much otherworldlyness
Eliza Madrigal: may seem unrelated but, quite intimate
Mickorod Renard: yes, I see that now
Eliza Madrigal: and captures the feeling of 'always available fulfillment'
Mickorod Renard: perhaps the pleasure a bee must feel when its collected
Eliza Madrigal smiles!
Bleu Oleander: :)
Mickorod Renard: he he
Eliza Madrigal laughs

Mickorod Renard: we must have endorphins for certail things..maybe that is a sign we are in the right direction
Eliza Madrigal: yay for endorphins!
Eliza Madrigal: lol
Mickorod Renard: he he
Eliza Madrigal: :) now I want to reread Gatsby again... really love it ... the imagery is so haunting and sticky

Retreat Next Week!

Mickorod Renard: the retreat? whats going on?..before you go..is there anything to prepare?
Eliza Madrigal: well I had hoped for ideas on the exercises....
Bleu Oleander: next week?
Eliza Madrigal: thoughts on one or two?
Eliza Madrigal: yes
Eliza Madrigal: at the retreat center
Eliza Madrigal: possibly unrecorded but not sure...
Eliza Madrigal: more 'immediate'
Eliza Madrigal: :)
Eliza Madrigal: we all liked.... the glow, the giant body....
Eliza Madrigal: going without going is probably not doable for this setting....

Mickorod Renard: an imaginary hill?
Eliza Madrigal: hey, that's a neat idea
Eliza Madrigal: an adaptation... like Mick's quilted hill
Eliza Madrigal: :)

Mickorod Renard: perhaps we could go up to a sky box?
Bleu Oleander: :)
Eliza Madrigal: yes we'll be in the retreat box
Eliza Madrigal: have you been there Mick?
Eliza Madrigal: if you go to my spot, there is a teleport to 600 level
Mickorod Renard: I dont think I have
Mickorod Renard: thanks, will try
Eliza Madrigal: ohh, please take a gander :)
Mickorod Renard: cheers

Eliza Madrigal: am trying to give you a landmark but doesn't seem to be working...
Eliza Madrigal: so enough to know the directions...it isn't on the board
Eliza Madrigal: intentionally, so that meetings are somewhat private
Mickorod Renard: great

--BELL--

Bleu Oleander: tp is on the ground at your plot still?
Eliza Madrigal: the board looks really nice btw
Bleu Oleander: ty :)
Eliza Madrigal: yes right on the ground
Mickorod Renard: which day is it,,next thursday?
Eliza Madrigal: yes
Mickorod Renard: ty
Eliza Madrigal: same time, but probably 90 minutes or slightly less
Bleu Oleander: will try to be there
Eliza Madrigal: so rest up

Eliza Madrigal: thanks...eden has said she'll come, and Tura should be back...
Bleu Oleander: nice
Mickorod Renard: great
Eliza Madrigal: but Riddle might be playing music on a porch with his friend...lol
Eliza Madrigal: so, hopefully Bruce, and Wol...
Eliza Madrigal: we'll see :)

Eliza Madrigal: Okay, am grabbing son and driving to get puppy
Mickorod Renard: well, suppose I had best be off
Bleu Oleander: ok get your baby
Mickorod Renard: take care,,and thanks
Bleu Oleander: take care you two
Eliza Madrigal: (((Mick))) (((Bleu)))) Thank you so much :))
Mickorod Renard: :)))
Bleu Oleander: ((( Eliza ))) ((( Mick ))))
Bleu Oleander: that's hard to type lol
Eliza Madrigal: hahah
Eliza Madrigal: ♥ ♥ ♥
Mickorod Renard: he he
Bleu Oleander: ♥ + ♥ + ♥ + ♥ + ♥
Bleu Oleander: ♥ + ♥ + ♥ + ♥ + ♥
Bleu Oleander: much easier