2013.10.08 01:00 - Soliloquy in the dark

The Guardian for this meeting was Catrinamonblue Resident. The comments are by Catrinamonblue Resident.

--BELL--
Catrinamonblue Resident: awake in the early morning darkness
Catrinamonblue Resident: having slept with the guardian session fresh in my mind
Catrinamonblue Resident: percolating
Catrinamonblue Resident: through my sleep

Catrinamonblue Resident: stopping
Catrinamonblue Resident: dropping
Catrinamonblue Resident: seeing
Catrinamonblue Resident: being
Catrinamonblue Resident: I am
Catrinamonblue Resident: me
Catrinamonblue Resident: in the moment
Catrinamonblue Resident: free flowing
Catrinamonblue Resident: ever changing
Catrinamonblue Resident: deep breath in
Catrinamonblue Resident: let go
Catrinamonblue Resident: all is right

Catrinamonblue Resident: everything happens as it should
Catrinamonblue Resident: even when we don't think it's right
Catrinamonblue Resident: even when we hurt
Catrinamonblue Resident: pain so great
Catrinamonblue Resident: that I feel I must drown
Catrinamonblue Resident: breathe
Catrinamonblue Resident: it changes
Catrinamonblue Resident: who we are
Catrinamonblue Resident: gives depth
Catrinamonblue Resident: bredth
Catrinamonblue Resident: to the existence of me
Catrinamonblue Resident: as the waves wash upon the shore
Catrinamonblue Resident: changing the lay of the land
Catrinamonblue Resident: so too does existence
Catrinamonblue Resident: change who we are
Catrinamonblue Resident: the lay of our minds
Catrinamonblue Resident: our perceptions
Catrinamonblue Resident: ourselves

Catrinamonblue Resident: I have always loved "I am who I am"
Catrinamonblue Resident: but I have always added
Catrinamonblue Resident: in the moment
Catrinamonblue Resident: and that changes from moment to moment
Catrinamonblue Resident: as I learn
Catrinamonblue Resident: grow
Catrinamonblue Resident: change
Catrinamonblue Resident: who I am
Catrinamonblue Resident: changes

--BELL--

Catrinamonblue Resident: from the guardian session
Catrinamonblue Resident: Pema Pera: a major idea behind the pauses is that our model of always trying to reach for something is wrong; that we already have what we need, if we only stop to look

Catrinamonblue Resident: My life experience has been
Catrinamonblue Resident: that everything is there, in place already
Catrinamonblue Resident: waiting for the time when it is needed
Catrinamonblue Resident: money
Catrinamonblue Resident: job
Catrinamonblue Resident: love
Catrinamonblue Resident: joy
Catrinamonblue Resident: hurt
Catrinamonblue Resident: pain
Catrinamonblue Resident: all are experienced just when needed
Catrinamonblue Resident: I have always been amazed how life already is there
Catrinamonblue Resident: how when I reach for things all that happens is strife
Catrinamonblue Resident: and hardship
Catrinamonblue Resident: but if I wait (and this doesn't mean not taking proactive steps) things fall into place
Catrinamonblue Resident: it is already there
Catrinamonblue Resident: all I had to do was look
Catrinamonblue Resident: and see
Catrinamonblue Resident: stop
Catrinamonblue Resident: and experience
Catrinamonblue Resident: the joy in the moments between the moments :)
Catrinamonblue Resident: even in the darkest times there are pockets of joy
Catrinamonblue Resident: moments between moments
Catrinamonblue Resident: experiences between experiences

Catrinamonblue Resident: I saw Eternity the other night,

Like a great ring of pure and endless light,

All calm, as it was bright;

And round beneath it,

Time in hours, days, years,

Driv’n by the spheres Like a vast shadow mov’d;

in which the world And all her train were hurl’d.

Catrinamonblue Resident: the first few lines of the poem "The World" by Henry Vaughan

--BELL--

Catrinamonblue Resident: I read this poem as a teenager
Catrinamonblue Resident: and these few lines have always stayed with me
Catrinamonblue Resident: fascinating me
Catrinamonblue Resident: life to me is like that
Catrinamonblue Resident: endless
Catrinamonblue Resident: seasons turning
Catrinamonblue Resident: one to the other
Catrinamonblue Resident: life beginning
Catrinamonblue Resident: ending
Catrinamonblue Resident: to begin again
Catrinamonblue Resident: moving
Catrinamonblue Resident: changing
Catrinamonblue Resident: and being
Catrinamonblue Resident: everything and nothing
Catrinamonblue Resident: all at the same
Catrinamonblue Resident: time
Catrinamonblue Resident: we are the sum of our experiences
Catrinamonblue Resident: plus something that can not be defined
Catrinamonblue Resident: a hint of the divine
Catrinamonblue Resident: a dash of eternity
Catrinamonblue Resident: mixed into our very fiber
Catrinamonblue Resident: if only we could be open enough to see it
Catrinamonblue Resident: taste it
Catrinamonblue Resident: experience it
Catrinamonblue Resident: be it

--BELL--

Catrinamonblue Resident: and with that
Catrinamonblue Resident: I shall go and lay down for an hour of rest before I truly start my day
Catrinamonblue Resident: I have enjoyed my soliloquy in the dark