2011.04.17 01:00 - Comfort zones

Wol Euler was guardian for this session.

Wol Euler: hello qt
Qt Core: 'morning Wol
Wol Euler: how are you today?
Qt Core: phisically well, a little angry at myself for not being in Assisi
Wol Euler nods.
Wol Euler: I can understand that feeling
Wol Euler: why didn't you go?
Qt Core: mainly as it felt too far from my confort area, not in phisical distance sense i mean
Wol Euler nods.
Qt Core: then, but after i deceded not to go several mundane things are happening these days ;-)
Wol Euler: ah :)
Wol Euler: life does tend to happen, doesn't it?
Qt Core: yes, with incredible bad timing too
Wol Euler smiles
Qt Core: i often wonder if Murphy's Laws are some religious dogmas or scientific truths ;-)
Wol Euler laughs.
Wol Euler: they are definitely true.
Qt Core: anyou, how are you today ?
Wol Euler: pretty well thanks, working this afternoon but only a few hours
Wol Euler: it's a sunny and warmish day
Wol Euler: which always raises my spirits
Qt Core: while i always say that weather hasn't a great meaning to me i found myself pretty happy about last week very warm (ver 25C) weather, past days back to more springtime standard 15/17C
Wol Euler nods.
Qt Core: ver=about... how i misspelled that ?)
Wol Euler: ha, I hadn't noticed. I read it correctly
Wol Euler: perhaps from french, vers
Wol Euler smiles.
Wol Euler: we read each other so tolerantly here :)
Qt Core: improbable, my ugly french isn't lurking at my fingertips usually ;-)
Wol Euler: a happy coincidence then
Wol Euler: the thing about comfort zones is this:
Wol Euler: they can come to feel tiny and constraining
Wol Euler: like the peak of a very steeply rising mountain
Wol Euler: so one feels that one will fall for miles if one steps out
Qt Core: or the top room in the classic ivory tower
Wol Euler: right

--BELL--

Wol Euler: there is no "outside" to be had from the zone itself
Wol Euler: but you can also see the comfort zone as a circle drawn with a stick in the sand of a wide and flat beach :)
Wol Euler: stepping outside is much easier then
Qt Core: like the image
Wol Euler smiles.
Wol Euler: I think of these images because I need them for myself, to help me understand
Wol Euler: I too have troubles with my comfort zones :)
Wol Euler: going to my first RL retreat was a real stretch
Qt Core: i noticed a thing in the pause
Qt Core: i find it easier to step out of my confort zone if the step is big, instead of just a peek out
Wol Euler: hmmm :)
Qt Core: and usually it resulted in something worth the effort :)
Wol Euler: yep :)
Wol Euler: so ... why not go to Assisi?
Qt Core: too near ? still in Italy so the only real "weird" thing would be the retreat itself ?
Wol Euler nods.
Wol Euler: well, retreats are pretty wierd if you haven't done one before :)
Qt Core: ni, never
Qt Core: nothing that can be called a retreat
Wol Euler: I was very apprehensive before going to Malta, I had no idea what would happen, and was worried about making a fool of myself in front of the group
Qt Core: same here :-)
Wol Euler smiles.
Wol Euler: but it didn't happen. The retreat was just like a PaB session
Qt Core: and making it a bad experience for others
Wol Euler nods.
Wol Euler: well, I think it's safe to say that I wasn't the only one who felt that way :)
Wol Euler: but it went well. It was very familiar and comfortable, we are all nice people
Qt Core: are we ?
Wol Euler: it's not as though I had gone alone to a place like Plum Village, to be among strangers -- professional meditators!
Wol Euler smiles. Yes, I think we are. All that I have met in person are very nice.
Wol Euler: btw: I'm eating these with my coffee :) http://www.mulinobianco.it/colazione...cotti/abbracci
Qt Core: professional meditators, interesting (and wrong) idea
Wol Euler: yes, absolutely -- but that is partly what I feared
Wol Euler: that there would be rituals and standards and secret handshakes, and I wouldn't know them
Wol Euler: how embarrassing!
Qt Core: ohh, i know them, quite good
Wol Euler: there's a little corner shop near me that imports such things
Qt Core: and then being unable to stay put, calm and composed during meditation times :-)
Wol Euler: mmhmm
Wol Euler: and again, if I had gone to a "professional" place like Plum Village or some ashram in India, htat might well have been true
Wol Euler: but the PaB retreats have been very comfortable, encouraging, uplifting
Qt Core: like Campagnole, Galletti and Ritornelli

--BELL--

Wol Euler grins. those look good
Qt Core: so i just need a pab retreat in a place way far from me phisically and culturally, somewhere in the thailand jungle maybe ?
Wol Euler: heheheh
Wol Euler: how about the one that Maxine is organizing on the US pacific coast?
Wol Euler: it's a lovely area, very beautiful and rugged
Wol Euler: http://wiki.playasbeing.org/Retreats/2011-09_Seattle_USA
Qt Core: seaside and mountains ? for a plain's man it is culturally far away :-)
Wol Euler: but that's what you wanted!?!?!?
Wol Euler grins.
Qt Core: i just had a "revelation", going to a retreat would make me travel alone, i not only rarely travel, but i never traveled alone (let say more than a couple hours by car)
Wol Euler: ah :)
Wol Euler: so there are several comfort zones to be stepped out of!
Qt Core: i'm not (yet) fearing it, just surprised
Wol Euler smiles.
Qt Core: yes there are and be more aware about flight departures and such ;-)
Wol Euler nods.
Wol Euler: but an intercontinental flight is not *substantially* different to a local one, it just lasts far longer
Wol Euler: you have the same security bullshit, the same drinks, the same not-quite-uncomfortable seats
Qt Core: i have to go... trvelling a couple km alone by car ;-)
Wol Euler: ok :)
Wol Euler: enjoy the day, qt
Wol Euler: and do think about the retreat....
Qt Core: yes, you can miss them the same way ;-)
Wol Euler: yep :)
Qt Core: bye
Wol Euler: bye for now