2009.06.06 19:00 - Meditation to Extinction

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    The Guardian for this meeting was Adams Rubble subbing for Pema who was in another time zone. The comments are by Adams Rubble.

    I arrived with Eliza and was first joined by Hana who I had not met before. Hana has quickly caught on to doing the nine second practice. Soon we were joined by Kenji. I post the log without further comment.

    Eliza Madrigal: Hello Adams, you look lovely tonight :)
    Adams Rubble: Thank you Eliza, you too :)
    Eliza Madrigal: Thank you :)
    Adams Rubble: Hello Hana
    Eliza Madrigal: Hi hana
    Hana Furlough: hello!
    Hana Furlough: sorry i'm new
    Adams Rubble: yes, welcome to second life
    Adams Rubble: have you been here before?
    Eliza Madrigal: Quite alright! Yes, Welcome!
    Hana Furlough: yeah i've been here before
    Hana Furlough: thank you!
    Hana Furlough: how are you?
    Adams Rubble: nice to meet you :)
    Eliza Madrigal runs for tea
    Adams Rubble: have you tried stopping for nine seconds yet Hana?
    Hana Furlough: yeah i've been doing it for a few weeks now
    Hana Furlough: it's incredible~
    Adams Rubble: Oh nice :)
    Eliza Madrigal: :)
    Hana Furlough: do you both practice like that too?
    Adams Rubble: Yes, I haven;t kept to the 15 minutes for a while but I stop often during the day
    Eliza Madrigal: yes, I really like the nine second pauses. I enjoy longer meditation also, but especially on busy days, stopping every quarter hr or so is enormously helpful.
    Hana Furlough: what does it feel like for you?
    Adams Rubble: Hello jenji :)
    Adams Rubble: kenji
    kenji Pookes: Hi all
    Hana Furlough: hi kenji~
    Eliza Madrigal: Such a simple thing, yet it seems to have a big impact on how the day flows
    Eliza Madrigal: Hi Kenji :)
    Adams Rubble: It is a hard question to answer Hana because I have gone through different periods
    Adams Rubble: but I often get an energy from it
    Adams Rubble: Hello Dophia :)
    Adams Rubble: Sophia
    Eliza Madrigal: Hi Dophia
    Adams Rubble having trouble with beginnings of names tonight
    Hana Furlough: hi sophia
    Eliza Madrigal: Heheheh...
    kenji Pookes: Hi Sophia
    Adams Rubble: hehe
    Eliza Madrigal: didn't see you Sophia!
    Eliza Madrigal: I just read Adams chat obviously
    Eliza Madrigal: heheh
    Adams Rubble: hehe
    Eliza Madrigal: Now I see you! :) Hi!
    SophiaSharon Larnia: Hi :))
    SophiaSharon Larnia: I love your wings Eliza :)
    Eliza Madrigal: Thank you... a lovely gift from a good friend :)
    Hana Furlough: yeah eliza -- they're amazing
    Eliza Madrigal: :) Being aware of one's breath, in general, seems a very healthful thing
    Adams Rubble: It's great that you got right into this so quickly Hana :)
    Eliza Madrigal: It causes a person to think about posture...
    Eliza Madrigal: maybe to center (for those of us who feel we benefit)
    Hana Furlough: but do you think we ever get too attached to the breath as an object?
    Eliza Madrigal: Interesting question
    Eliza Madrigal: Personally, being addicted to breath doesn't seem harmful or even a danger of attachment in any way...
    kenji Pookes: Sorry, I came in late, but "adicted to breath?"
    Adams Rubble: this is a new thread Kenji :)
    Eliza Madrigal: Well..hana said attached
    Eliza Madrigal: But I extrapolated....
    kenji Pookes: But how can one be adicted to something you can't live without? That was a really odd sentence.
    Eliza Madrigal: that even beneficial things can become habits
    Adams Rubble agrees with Kenji on this one
    kenji Pookes: Um, I tend to think of breathing as more than a habit.
    Adams Rubble: hehe
    Eliza Madrigal: haha
    Eliza Madrigal: yes of course. I was answering in a sense of meditation actually...
    Hana Furlough: wow addicted to breath i lke it
    Adams Rubble: but I think Hana was talking about the focusing on the breath
    kenji Pookes: And I would say I'm quite happily addicted.
    Adams Rubble: :)
    Eliza Madrigal: whether some could actually use meditation as a way to disconnect
    Hana Furlough: but can we just be the breath?
    kenji Pookes: Sounds like a goo idea. That's what zen is all about.
    Eliza Madrigal: I like that idea very much hana
    kenji Pookes: It seems to me that meditation has many different purposes depending upon the ideology associated with the practice.
    Hana Furlough: totally
    Eliza Madrigal: Sure
    kenji Pookes: In zen, I would say that becoming the breath is the path to becoming not the breath.
    kenji Pookes: Check that, A path.
    Eliza Madrigal: :) Go on?
    kenji Pookes: Must I?
    kenji Pookes: OK....
    Hana Furlough: yeah i want to hear more
    kenji Pookes: The object of meditation is to eliminate the self. In other words, meditation (zazen) is simply a method for achieving the ultimate goal of ceasing to exist as a self.
    kenji Pookes: I think the concept of meditation (and practice) has taken on different meanings as it has enterred American (and other) society and been reinvented as a tool for achieving peace, etc. (coming from a variety of sources, of course, not just zen).
    Eliza Madrigal: Ceasing to exist as a self is one way to put it... what about seeing the self as not disconnected from everyone/thing else....?
    Hana Furlough: yeah like the self is So Big that it's not what we think it is at all
    kenji Pookes: Elimination of self is the same thing as recognizing that there is no selfl onlye one thing.
    Eliza Madrigal: Kenji, sure. Many people just find that stopping is good for them...helps them feel better :) Not much wrong with that
    kenji Pookes: I'm not making a value judgment, just an observation. It is what it is--everything is relative.
    Eliza Madrigal: Kenji, I see a little leap in there (that ceasing to exist is same), but I do hear what you are saying
    kenji Pookes: There may be a leap in the way I'm writing it here, but it is pretty consistent within Buddhism (at least in zen). Question: what does "nirvana" (satori in Japanese) mean?
    Hana Furlough: is satori nirvana?
    kenji Pookes: Satori is the translation for nirvana in Japanese.
    Hana Furlough: i thought it was more like awakening
    Hana Furlough: isn't that nehan?
    kenji Pookes: My understanding is that it is nirvana, but I may be wrong. In any case, what does nirvana mean?
    Hana Furlough: extinction, right?
    Eliza Madrigal: My understanding may be way off.... to me satori is a moment...a glimpse...kensho
    Hana Furlough: yeah that's what it is too me too
    Hana Furlough: so kensho every 15 min sounds pretty nice, right?
    kenji Pookes: To blow out a flame, so, yes, extinction. But extinction as I understand it is recgnition of no self, which, in turn, can be seen as recognition of nondifferentiation.
    Eliza Madrigal: Well perhaps... but not something one can 'make'
    Hana Furlough: nicely put!
    Eliza Madrigal: One can certainly make place for
    kenji Pookes: I learned satori as meaning enlightenment as the first step. I have understood it as ongoing, not on and off.
    Eliza Madrigal: Sure...yes
    kenji Pookes: Enlightenment in zen, at least, as I understand it is recognition of that nondifferentiation.
    kenji Pookes: Enlightenment = no self.
    Eliza Madrigal: I'm listening Kenji, and agreeing....
    Eliza Madrigal: to a certain extendt
    Eliza Madrigal: *extent
    kenji Pookes: I'm done.
    kenji Pookes: Of course, all of this philosophical stuff has virtually nothing to do with how zen is actually practiced by most Japanese who belong to the sect.
    kenji Pookes: Shit, I did it again--bored everyone to sleep.
    SophiaSharon Larnia: oh no Kenji I'm listening intently
    SophiaSharon Larnia: been doing too much of that lately
    kenji Pookes: zzzzzzzzzzzzzz
    SophiaSharon Larnia: laughs
    Eliza Madrigal: Forgive me for not having the words... I find a distinction I can't quite articulate...plus like the pauses : )
    kenji Pookes: None of this can be articulated. Trying to articulate it is pointless. It can't really be talked about with any real success.
    Eliza Madrigal: It isn't pointless if enjoyable.
    kenji Pookes: Well, in the sense of actually getting there. It's fun to talk about, but in reality, the only way to do it is to do it.
    SophiaSharon Larnia: talking about it here and thinking about what others have described have helped me explain some to myself
    kenji Pookes: If I really want to get zenish, though, the response to all of this would be that the fact we are talking this way means we don't get it.
    kenji Pookes: And haven't got it.
    Eliza Madrigal: :)
    Eliza Madrigal: I have to admit that I'm less interested in 'getting it' than in simply sharing when I'm here....
    kenji Pookes: Yacking is a very AMerican passtime, but one that does not sit well in some other cultures and one that is, at least from the zen perspective, completely counter to achieving enlightenment.
    kenji Pookes: But then, Eliza, what's the purpose of discussing these things? Not arguing against, just wondering?
    kenji Pookes: Hi
    SophiaSharon Larnia: HI Lady
    Eliza Madrigal: I find connection with others very important...for me it is refreshing and encouraging
    Eliza Madrigal: Hi Lady, welcome to Play as Being :)
    Eliza Madrigal: In the big pavilion....
    Eliza Madrigal: see lights maybe?
    kenji Pookes: I agree, Eliza, but I think if a zen monk walked in on us he'd likely just tell us this is all mental masturbation.
    Eliza Madrigal: hahah
    SophiaSharon Larnia laughs
    Eliza Madrigal: and maybe some of us would be
    Eliza Madrigal: and others not :)
    SophiaSharon Larnia: yes perhaps
    Hana Furlough: but if we don't talk about it, how do we access it?
    kenji Pookes: I struggle with this issue, because I enjoy talking about these things, but I have also practiced zen meditation in Japan and I've got a pretty good sense that talking about it wont' get me anywhere.
    kenji Pookes: Hana, you hit the nail on the head. You access it by doing.
    Eliza Madrigal: yes, maybe the issue there is that talking with the idea that you are getting somewhere is mistaken
    Eliza Madrigal: ?
    kenji Pookes: IF enlightenment is the goal, there isn't any point in talking. Anyone ever seen a daruma doll?
    Eliza Madrigal: For me, making a goal of enlightenment is missing the point too
    Eliza Madrigal: but no....what is a daruma doll?
    kenji Pookes: Yes, actually this issue has been argued within Buddhism quite a bit. If you set out to become enlightened, then you are already screwing up.
    SophiaSharon Larnia: (ty Eliza)
    Hana Furlough: yeah but they talk about it all the time in japan and in zen
    kenji Pookes: A daruma doll is a round red, black, and white doll that one can buy for good luck at Buddhist temples in Japan. It has no arms and legs.
    kenji Pookes: The monks don't
    Hana Furlough: yeah no goal
    kenji Pookes: The reason it has no legs is because Bodhidaruma is said to have sat and meditated in front of a wall for someting like eight years until his arms and legs fell off.
    kenji Pookes: A very insular and individual form of meditation.
    Eliza Madrigal: I do like thinking about enlightenment, though really Play as Being isn't a buddhist group
    kenji Pookes: No it's not, of course.
    Adams Rubble: Play as Being assumes we already are enlightened
    Hana Furlough: but if we start thinking that we need to medidate like bodhidharma, then we make an obstacle, right?
    Eliza Madrigal: :) Adams
    kenji Pookes: So what does it mean to be enlightened?
    kenji Pookes: YEs, Hana, if you want it you can't have it.
    Adams Rubble: we start from the end here
    kenji Pookes: riddles?
    Hana Furlough: so amazing~
    SophiaSharon Larnia: I think of it as being awake, awake to being
    Adams Rubble: nice Sophia
    Eliza Madrigal nods
    kenji Pookes: I actually see enlightenment much more along the zen line--elimination of clinging to the world and elimination of self.
    Eliza Madrigal: Perhaps
    kenji Pookes: I'm not saying I'm right, but that is how I see it.
    Adams Rubble: no need to give it up in PaB...just take it lightly
    SophiaSharon Larnia: yes, i see that interpretation, but don't thinm it is complete
    SophiaSharon Larnia: think*
    kenji Pookes: I should probably add that although I deinfe elightenment that way, I have no interest in becoming enlightened.
    Eliza Madrigal: Sophia, more you'd like to say?
    Hana Furlough: i should be going
    Hana Furlough: it was so nice connecting with all of you
    SophiaSharon Larnia: wants to go write a another essay lol
    Adams Rubble: bye Hana. Nice to meet you :)
    Hana Furlough: have a wonderful day~
    Eliza Madrigal: Hana, nice that you came tonight! :)
    kenji Pookes: An essay on what? Bye Hana.
    Eliza Madrigal: hahah Sophia. I'd love to read them
    kenji Pookes: Do you publish your essays?
    SophiaSharon Larnia: i have a lot of thought going on right now that are difficult to express in conversation,
    SophiaSharon Larnia: oh no
    Eliza Madrigal: yes, relate :)
    kenji Pookes: Why not?
    SophiaSharon Larnia: timidity, fear of being judge as pendantic
    kenji Pookes: Stop clinging to self...
    SophiaSharon Larnia: yes
    kenji Pookes: Actually, you should try to publish your ideas. It can stimulate others.
    SophiaSharon Larnia: i agree with your definition of enlightenment to a certain degree
    SophiaSharon Larnia: but we are physical, and to me, this is for a specific reason
    SophiaSharon Larnia: i do not seek to be enlightened, then in this sense
    Eliza Madrigal: The physical component is crucial Sophia, is this what you mean... It may be what I mean by disconnection, which is why I ask
    kenji Pookes: As I understand zen, the best real path to enlightenment is not to meditate or to do anything in particular, it is just to be and not to cling to the fact of being or the being of otehr things.
    kenji Pookes: I think that approach makes a lot of sense.
    SophiaSharon Larnia: yes, this disconnection from others is exactly what i meant
    kenji Pookes: So you mean to avoid the disconnection? I'm not quite clear.
    Eliza Madrigal: In Zen, taking the posture is the whole deal ....or that's what's said anyway :)
    kenji Pookes: What do you mean "the posture"?
    SophiaSharon Larnia: Bodhidaruma may have acheived his definition of enlighenment, but to me this seems like a waste of life
    kenji Pookes: I might agree with you on that Sophia. I'm not sure.
    Eliza Madrigal: "Just Sit" is what I meant, but not because that is my practice. I might like it to be but I'm fond of complicating things. hah:)
    SophiaSharon Larnia: :)
    kenji Pookes: I see. But just sitting can be interpreted as just being.
    Eliza Madrigal: Sure... this is it...
    Eliza Madrigal: that zen is dishes, zen is playing with your children,
    Eliza Madrigal: zen is feeding the dog
    SophiaSharon Larnia: I have been doing alot of sitting and thinking, and thinking...and had disturbed myself so much, i had to stop
    kenji Pookes: You need to stop thinking.
    kenji Pookes: Just sit.
    SophiaSharon Larnia: so, started visualizations
    Eliza Madrigal: Ah, did this help?
    kenji Pookes: Sophia, do you find the world and everyone around you hillariously funny?
    SophiaSharon Larnia: yes, imagined my thoughts, judgements, perconceived notions as a stone in my hand
    SophiaSharon Larnia: sometimes
    SophiaSharon Larnia: but some things are not funny
    kenji Pookes: I do most ofthe time.
    kenji Pookes: True, some things are not funny in particualry, but the overall thing is pretty funny.
    SophiaSharon Larnia: people are extremely self centered, so very self centered it is alarming and bizarre to me
    SophiaSharon Larnia: i dont get it
    kenji Pookes: Why care about whether or not they are self centered?
    SophiaSharon Larnia: becuase anything anyone does affects the others
    SophiaSharon Larnia: but i see where youre going, and youre right
    SophiaSharon Larnia: (didnt mean to assume i knew what you thought sorry)
    kenji Pookes: Sophia, if you are horridly self-centered (and I don't think you are), what matters it to me? It doesn't really affect me.
    kenji Pookes: I think you do, Sophia.
    kenji Pookes: It only has an infleunce on me if I dwell on it.
    SophiaSharon Larnia: your actions in the world, material acquisition and disregarding other people's rights, it tramples on others
    Adams Rubble: I am afraid I must go. Would the last person to leave please turn out the light?
    kenji Pookes: Good night.
    Adams Rubble: :)
    Eliza Madrigal: :) Yes Adams. Night!
    SophiaSharon Larnia: :)) bye Adam
    SophiaSharon Larnia: Adams*
    Adams Rubble: bye all :)
    kenji Pookes: It only tramples on them if they view it as trampling.
    SophiaSharon Larnia: does it
    kenji Pookes: I think so.
    Eliza Madrigal: There is a certain energizing quality to spending time with someone who is open and giving
    kenji Pookes: Suppose right now you turn to me and say, "Kenji you are the biggest ass the world has ever known>' Should I let that bother me?
    SophiaSharon Larnia: oh yes
    SophiaSharon Larnia: hell no
    SophiaSharon Larnia laughs
    SophiaSharon Larnia: But!!!
    kenji Pookes: Then why worry about others who are self-centered?
    kenji Pookes: And don't talk about my butt.
    SophiaSharon Larnia: ok Kenji i will leave your but alone
    Eliza Madrigal: :)
    kenji Pookes: Thanks.
    kenji Pookes: I'd love to read onr of your essays, Sophia.
    SophiaSharon Larnia: ok Kenji, i think differently thanyou, first of all, i am not train as you apparently are
    SophiaSharon Larnia: trained*
    kenji Pookes: So, who gives a shit about that?
    kenji Pookes: Diffrent is good.
    kenji Pookes: Spelling is good, too, but I'm not doing that very well tonight.
    SophiaSharon Larnia: i see people as avatars representating a facet of a central "self
    kenji Pookes: Interesting idea.
    Eliza Madrigal: Hmm
    kenji Pookes: We are all actors, basically.
    kenji Pookes: Erving Goffman wrote quite a bit about that 50 years ago or so.
    SophiaSharon Larnia: yes, i am not a hindu exactly, but the ideology comes closest
    Eliza Madrigal: lila?
    kenji Pookes: Well, one day I'm one thing and another day I'm another. We all put on different masks all the time.
    kenji Pookes: I've got to run for tonight. Been a fascinating conversation. Thanks. Have to get up at 5:30am to take my son to a baseball game.
    Eliza Madrigal: Night Kenji, enjoy the game
    SophiaSharon Larnia: :)) have fun Kenji
    kenji Pookes: Good night. You both are a joy to converse with.
    SophiaSharon Larnia: be the ball
    SophiaSharon Larnia: (kidding)
    kenji Pookes: Well, there is a lot of zen in hitting a baseball, actually.
    SophiaSharon Larnia: yes
    kenji Pookes: G'night.
    SophiaSharon Larnia: night
    Eliza Madrigal: Thanks Kenji, Nite :)
    SophiaSharon Larnia: so Eliza, sorry to flake out, that usually happens when i open my mouth so to speak
    Eliza Madrigal: Sophia, do you have a moment to say more about the Hindu idea?
    SophiaSharon Larnia: i dont mean it to be hindu, it is just what i feel
    Eliza Madrigal: Sophia, not at all.
    Eliza Madrigal: At all.
    Eliza Madrigal: I ask because I love this idea...or at least the picture it paints...
    Eliza Madrigal: Of 'god' dreaming the world and experiencing the world in players playing
    Eliza Madrigal: worlds I should say
    SophiaSharon Larnia: the way I see it, Our bodies are animated by a consciousness that becomes corporeal, to function in this plane,
    SophiaSharon Larnia: it is part of something much much larger
    SophiaSharon Larnia: but delibertly veiled
    SophiaSharon Larnia: delibertly
    Eliza Madrigal: yes...an intentional dreaming and forgetting
    SophiaSharon Larnia: oops cant spell sorry
    SophiaSharon Larnia: yes
    Eliza Madrigal speaks typo
    Eliza Madrigal: :)
    SophiaSharon Larnia grins
    SophiaSharon Larnia: now, this is frustrating to me, because the implications for this seem almost endless
    Eliza Madrigal: and you find the open-endedness frustrating?
    SophiaSharon Larnia: interesting way to put it, i guess i do
    Eliza Madrigal: My qualm would be with choosing to play out horific scenarios...can't fit that in the beautiful painting.
    SophiaSharon Larnia: i also see these animating consciousness as ultimately linked
    Eliza Madrigal: yes
    SophiaSharon Larnia: yes i have been down a very dark road about this in the last few weeks
    Eliza Madrigal: and this is why you felt the visualizations necessary?
    SophiaSharon Larnia: why i started visualizations
    Eliza Madrigal: :)
    SophiaSharon Larnia grins
    SophiaSharon Larnia: yes, the stone a described, i need to see it leave me hand
    SophiaSharon Larnia: I described*
    Eliza Madrigal: for you to be able to set it down and stop turning it over?
    SophiaSharon Larnia: feel it in the hand, firm, cool to the touch, my hand opening, and the stone drops
    SophiaSharon Larnia: yes it is very difficult
    Eliza Madrigal: hm, yes. Is it that you pick it back up after?
    SophiaSharon Larnia: the few times i really tried this i see it falling into a stream bed
    Eliza Madrigal: :)
    SophiaSharon Larnia: im sorry i dont understand your question
    SophiaSharon Larnia: how do you drop it Eliza??
    Eliza Madrigal: letting the stone go... I was thinking that one might be able to let it go a few times, but if they felt themselves pick it up again maybe the next time might seem more difficult to set down ... but I don't want to project
    SophiaSharon Larnia: well, im not really leeting it go
    SophiaSharon Larnia: letting*
    SophiaSharon Larnia: Are you able to drop this and how do you do it?
    Eliza Madrigal: My process, if you will, is a bit different I think....
    Eliza Madrigal: but I like visualizations as well
    Eliza Madrigal: I'm more inclined to try to open space in something...
    Eliza Madrigal: if that makes sense
    SophiaSharon Larnia: can you explain?
    Eliza Madrigal: A little...
    Eliza Madrigal: If I have something that is preoccupying me I sit with it
    Eliza Madrigal: and think that in the moment there is absolutely nothing 'wrong'...all is fine
    Eliza Madrigal: and try to dwell in that ... get in there
    Eliza Madrigal: and the peace expands
    Eliza Madrigal: and then the thing drops itself usually....
    Eliza Madrigal: or sometimes something odd might happen I didn't expect...
    Eliza Madrigal: in the visualizing...
    SophiaSharon Larnia: like what?
    Eliza Madrigal: haha
    Eliza Madrigal: well..something that never occured to me
    SophiaSharon Larnia: :))
    Eliza Madrigal: a new angle, or solution, or it may just seems silly...
    Eliza Madrigal: or something I didn't bring will drop
    Eliza Madrigal: haha...who knows
    Eliza Madrigal: :) But that's my oddness maybe. No one has asked me before
    Eliza Madrigal: I've related though, to many things you've said over these months...
    SophiaSharon Larnia: :)) I am open to any ideas people have
    Eliza Madrigal: regarding pulling back because you felt intense... though that's what I describe me to have heard you say?
    SophiaSharon Larnia: i dont think ive said much, and what i have said comes garbled in translation (thought to typed words)
    SophiaSharon Larnia: yes i do that, that is my MO
    SophiaSharon Larnia: it comes in waves
    Eliza Madrigal: :)
    SophiaSharon Larnia: have ideas, go woth them to where they take me, spend time processing them and hopefully being transformed by them
    SophiaSharon Larnia: but this time, i have never had this experience before
    SophiaSharon Larnia: to be so disturbed by what i am thinking
    Eliza Madrigal: Oh my
    Eliza Madrigal: Do you practice yoga or body work of some sort?
    SophiaSharon Larnia: i wanted to really examine, really get at the root at why i make the judgements that i make
    SophiaSharon Larnia: where they come from, from as far back as i could go
    SophiaSharon Larnia: to release them, if you will
    Eliza Madrigal: Hm, yes
    SophiaSharon Larnia: i do sit with music on
    SophiaSharon Larnia: thats not really yogo
    SophiaSharon Larnia: hahaha yoga*
    SophiaSharon Larnia: i had the the idea doing this would dissolve them
    Eliza Madrigal: :) hehe... I ask because it seems important
    Eliza Madrigal: for some who tend to be intuititive...
    Eliza Madrigal: *intuitive
    Eliza Madrigal: to keep hands in the dirt, so to speak ...
    Eliza Madrigal: and what you mentioned earlier seems so important
    SophiaSharon Larnia: b eing intuitive has little to do with trying at all
    Eliza Madrigal: re: enlightenment
    SophiaSharon Larnia: yes, i want to be awake a iwant to see things as they really are. and am trying to remove the filters from my view, so i can see clearly
    Eliza Madrigal: the trying can get in the way
    SophiaSharon Larnia: yes
    SophiaSharon Larnia: so examined the filters
    SophiaSharon Larnia: and got lost
    SophiaSharon Larnia: lol
    Eliza Madrigal nods
    Eliza Madrigal: Ah
    Eliza Madrigal: long held patterns then
    Eliza Madrigal: ?
    SophiaSharon Larnia: yes
    Eliza Madrigal: Forgive me if I define things awry. I want to understand better :)
    SophiaSharon Larnia: im grateful that you are thank you :))
    Eliza Madrigal: There are certain patterns/things I don't go near unless they seem to come up organically
    Eliza Madrigal: but when they do, yes I think that is like a signal that I'm able to let them go or understand something
    SophiaSharon Larnia: yes! it is synchronistic for me, i never thought of the word organic for this
    Eliza Madrigal: :)
    SophiaSharon Larnia: but i have heard others talk about this here, situations do present themselves that address what you have been thinking/dealing with
    Eliza Madrigal nods
    SophiaSharon Larnia: i do have to go, i am going away and have to pack :)) I think you are going on vaction soon too??
    Eliza Madrigal: Yes...leaving Tuesday I hope!
    SophiaSharon Larnia: me too!!
    Eliza Madrigal: :)
    SophiaSharon Larnia: youre going away longer tho, have a safe journey
    Eliza Madrigal: Safe and fine travels then, Sophia. It was good to see you tonight.
    SophiaSharon Larnia: you too
    Eliza Madrigal: Thank you very much! :)
    Eliza Madrigal: Nite!
    SophiaSharon Larnia: thank you!!
    SophiaSharon Larnia: night
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