2009.02.28 07:00 - roots of unhappiness

The Guardian for this meeting was Lia Rikugun. The comments are by Lia Rikugun.

time for welcomes 

Susi Alcott: brb
Fael Illyar: Hi Quen, Scath :)
Scathach Rhiadra: Hi Fael:)
Scathach Rhiadra: Hi Quen, Susi
Susi Alcott: je Quen and Fael
Susi Alcott: hi Scath
Fael Illyar: Hello Arisia :)
Susi Alcott: hi Lia
Scathach Rhiadra: Hi Lia:)
Lia Rikugun: hello everybody
Lia Rikugun: hello susi hello scath
Susi Alcott: hi Arisia
Fael Illyar: Hi Lia :)
Lia Rikugun: hello fael
Scathach Rhiadra: Hi Adams
Lia Rikugun: hello adams
Susi Alcott: hi Adams
Fael Illyar: Hi Adams :)

vicky christina barcelona and predefined ideas about our lifes

  

Lia Rikugun: today i watched a movie on the airplane: vicky christina barcelona
Lia Rikugun: did u see it?
Adams Rubble: Hello Scath, Lia, Susi, Fael and Quen :)
Scathach Rhiadra: no, not me
Adams Rubble: and Arsiai :)
Lia Rikugun: it made me think that we have so many ideas about hoqw we have to live out life and what we want that we might miss things that dont fit into that image
Lia Rikugun: i always need to remind miyself
Scathach Rhiadra nods
Lia Rikugun: and no plan can be good
Scathach Rhiadra: its very easy to focus too much on some things and miss everything else going on around us:)
Lia Rikugun: yes but even things you think you want
Lia Rikugun: your surroundings are pressuring on you or society
Lia Rikugun: and then you believe you want thta
Fael Illyar: My approach is, plan but don't worry too much if the plan doesn't work out.
Lia Rikugun: yes i think thats great
Scathach Rhiadra nods
Lia Rikugun: and also dotn stick to the plan so strikly
Lia Rikugun: if there are other things opening up you would not normally do maybe
Susi Alcott: _/!\_

  

Pema arrives and asks me about my flight

Fael Illyar: Hi Pema :)
Lia Rikugun: hello pema
Susi Alcott: hi Pema
Scathach Rhiadra: Hello Pema
Pema Pera: Hi Lia, Adams, Scathach, Arisia!
Adams Rubble: Hello pema :)
Pema Pera: Hi Susi, Fael!
Pema Pera: did you have a good flight back, Lia?
Lia Rikugun: thank you yes, but i only slept 10 minutes
Lia Rikugun: :(
Lia Rikugun: so i am pretty tired
Pema Pera: wow, perhaps you can tell us your dreams, in real time :)
Fael Illyar smiles.
Lia Rikugun: haha, i dont remmeber any dreams
Lia Rikugun: actually when i was sleeping
Lia Rikugun: i heard a big bang
Lia Rikugun: and looked up
Lia Rikugun: and there was a woman in front of my lying on the ground
Lia Rikugun: she fainted
Lia Rikugun: i think she is ok now
Pema Pera: in the airplane?
Lia Rikugun: yes yes
Pema Pera: there is almost no room in airplanes these days to lie on the ground . . .
Pema Pera: (Lia visited Fefonz and me in Princeton for a few weeks, just returned to Germany)
Pema Pera: glad to hear she was okay, after all
Scathach Rhiadra: ah, welcome back to Europe Lia:)
Susi Alcott: _/!\_
Lia Rikugun: :) thank you
Lia Rikugun: actually i went to a japanese house today :)
Lia Rikugun: directly after coming back
Lia Rikugun: hehe
Pema Pera: ?
Lia Rikugun: japanese culture house
Scathach Rhiadra: like a museam, living museam?
Lia Rikugun: yes yes they had a tea ceremony
Lia Rikugun: which was already fully booked
Lia Rikugun: and an exhibition
Lia Rikugun: and a talk

we are all wearing a crown on our head...

Fael Illyar was wondering, what thoughts does this crown that's on her head bring up in different people?
Susi Alcott: _/!\_
Scathach Rhiadra: :)
Lia Rikugun: i could nt attach it somehow
Lia Rikugun: :(
Pema Pera: it makes me miss my hair . . .
Susi Alcott: so sory Pema
Lia Rikugun: this is what happens
Pema Pera: that's my thought :)
Scathach Rhiadra: heh:)
Pema Pera: I know, can't have it all . . .
Lia Rikugun: outch my head
Adams Rubble: :)

 Arisia, one of Pemas first friends in Second Life has found his way to PaB

Pema Pera: Has everybody here met Arisia?
Adams Rubble feels like I've been to Burger King :)
Lia Rikugun: no i havent
Lia Rikugun: hello arisia
Susi Alcott: neither I
Lia Rikugun: oh i have to ask
Scathach Rhiadra: yes I have
Adams Rubble: No this is my first time. Nice to meet you Arisia :)
Lia Rikugun: are you new here
Lia Rikugun: arisia
Lia Rikugun: have you been here before?
Arisia Vita: Hi everyone
Pema Pera: Arisia was one of the first friends I met in Second Life, through Kat Lemieux
Arisia Vita: Once
Pema Pera: Arisia, why don't you come sit in the circle, next to Scathach!
Arisia Vita: if she wouldn't mind...
Scathach Rhiadra: of cousrse not:)
Pema Pera: Arisias was working very hard for the International Space Museum, with Kat, oh, it was back in 2007, toward the end of 2007
Pema Pera: So as we would say in Japan, this is the third year we know each other
Pema Pera: I was glad to hear yesterday from Arisia, during the phenomenology workshop, that he had found his way to PaB recently
Pema Pera: So it's great to see you here, Aririsa, after all that time!
Lia Rikugun: yes welcome!
Arisia Vita: and great to see you again Pema
Arisia Vita: and all
Susi Alcott: great to meet you Arisia no matter we dint' meet before
Adams Rubble: It is nice to have you here
Fael Illyar: Nice to meet you Arisia :)
Pema Pera: are you still involved with ISM, the international Space Museum, Arisia?

a new comer joins us but leaves soon after :(

Lia Rikugun: hello ******
Fael Illyar: Hello ****** :)
Susi Alcott: hi ******
Pema Pera: ******, feel free to join us if you like
Adams Rubble: Hello ******
Lia Rikugun: have you been here before? ******
Arisia Vita: yes I am
Scathach Rhiadra: Hello ******
Lia Rikugun: we are a group that meditates
Lia Rikugun: we take every 15 minutes 9 secoond sof our time to drop everything
Lia Rikugun: and here we talk about our experiences
Lia Rikugun: you can find all the information on the wiki
Lia Rikugun: http://playasbeing.wik.is/
Lia Rikugun: we record these sessions
Lia Rikugun: would you mind if we include what you are saying?

Arisias work in the space museum

Pema Pera: what are your roles in the space museum, Arisia? Do you help building or organizing, or do you work on other aspects?
******: Hey!
Arisia Vita: I sit quietly and listen.... :)
Lia Rikugun: i guess i should erase the name?
Pema Pera: I'm sure you are doing more than that :)
Fael Illyar does that a lot too.
Pema Pera: yes, Lia, there are two ways to do that: you can either erase all reference to the name, or replace the name everywhere by "anonymous"
Adams Rubble giggles at "appearance" of last guest
Pema Pera: :-)

Why are people so unhappy?

Lia Rikugun: i have a question
Lia Rikugun: why are people so unhappy?
Lia Rikugun: is it because they are so afraid to change things
Lia Rikugun: they think in specific structures
Susi Alcott: people have different needs
Scathach Rhiadra: or of changes happening to them, outside their control maybe
Lia Rikugun: and labels
Susi Alcott: not at all can get them fullfilled
Pema Pera: Hallo Europe!
Europe Alchemi: Good day :)
Pema Pera: come join us in our circle!
Lia Rikugun: hello europe
Scathach Rhiadra: hello Europe
Lia Rikugun: have you been here before europe?
Adams Rubble: Hello Europe
Pema Pera: Europe is another good friend of mine, from Holland in fact
Europe Alchemi: This is my first time here :)
Lia Rikugun: ok so no need for explanation s:)
Fael Illyar: Hello Europe :)
Lia Rikugun: oh ok, so we are recording our sessions and if it is ok for you we would like to include what you are saying
Adams Rubble: welcome Europe :)
Europe Alchemi: Thank you :)
Europe Alchemi: Fine with me :)
Pema Pera: thanks, Europe!
Pema Pera: our blog is up on the web on http://playasbeing.wik.is/
Europe Alchemi: Thank you :)
Pema Pera: we were just talking about happiness and needs and labels :)
Pema Pera: Lia asked why people are unhappy
Lia Rikugun: do you have an answer europe? :)
Lia Rikugun: i somehow think they are afraid to change things
Europe Alchemi: back from reading the website, very interesting
Europe Alchemi: Happy was a topic many times in a forum group I have been and to its very much depending on where someone lives and what his standards are... but very interesting :)
Fael Illyar: Yes, very personal matter :)
Europe Alchemi: and it differs per time period
Lia Rikugun: yes but what would be the general idea also
Lia Rikugun: of course everybody has different needs
Lia Rikugun: or ideas
Lia Rikugun: but maybe this is also the problem
Lia Rikugun: you think you need things but actually you dont
Lia Rikugun: or you think you need to live you r life in a certain way
Europe Alchemi: agrees fully
Lia Rikugun: and you are afraif of living it differently
Lia Rikugun: which makes you unhappy
Lia Rikugun: ???
Europe Alchemi: change is frightning
Adams Rubble: wb Quen
Scathach Rhiadra: wb Quen
Europe Alchemi: Hello :)

dutch speaking....

quen Oh: hi all, back again, had neighbour over for coffee just after logging in
Pema Pera: Hoi Quen!
Fael Illyar: wb Quen :)
quen Oh: hoi Pema!
Pema Pera: Quen en Europe, jullie zijn landgenoten, kennen jullie elkaar al?
Susi Alcott: hi quen
quen Oh: hi Europe, leuk je te leren kennen!
Europe Alchemi: Hi Quen, leuk je te ontmoeten :)
Pema Pera: are the Dutch in the majority perhaps, today?
Scathach Rhiadra: almost:)
quen Oh: 3 on 9 iss the score now?
Pema Pera: or the leading fraction, I mean :)
Scathach Rhiadra: I used to live in Holland, and am amased I understood what you said, its is so long since I read Dutch:)

worldwise versus personally unhappy

Europe Alchemi: I can be unhappy in two different ways... personally and worldwise... as in how politics, science etc do not develep as how I would like them to be
Pema Pera: perhaps Lia understood too?
Pema Pera: In which case the five of us then *are* the majority :-)
Lia Rikugun: soory no :(
Fael Illyar: how is it different to be unhappy worldwise vs personally?
quen Oh: mmm are we going to discuss something typically Dutch Pema? Wooden shoes, windwmills, tulips, cheese, Rembrand, Spinoza?
Europe Alchemi: well personally touches me directly... worldwise only when I choose to be connected with it, I guess, by news etc
Adams Rubble: Calvinism?
Lia Rikugun: i understand
Europe Alchemi: :)
quen Oh smiles
Pema Pera: :)
quen Oh: interesting Europe, how did you feel when Obama was elected?
Europe Alchemi: I was happy... a friend in here is from Hawaii and told me about Obama long before he went for president so yes; Happy to the fullest
Susi Alcott: >one can be sad for sad things world wide but feel still happyness for good tihings

the Dalai Lama as example to be happy in unhappy circumstances

Pema Pera: An interesting challenge is to remain happy while working to improve terribly unhappy circumstances, like the Dalai Lama does . . . .
Fael Illyar: yes, being sad is not the same as being unhappy.
Europe Alchemi: Agree Pema
quen Oh: I was amazed to see how many people outside US were closely watching that I raised to hear the acceptance speech
Scathach Rhiadra nods
Pema Pera: there can be deeply underlying happiness, beyond personal or impersonal, yet acknowledgment of unhappiness that needs to be confronted
Pema Pera: on a more relative level

change the world

Adams Rubble: The world goes on whether we like it or not
quen Oh: well if we all don't like how it goes on, it is time for some change...
Lia Rikugun: and are you afraid of change ?
quen Oh: and chances it can change are higher
Europe Alchemi: I agree on the Time
Lia Rikugun: who has teh courage for change?
Europe Alchemi: I do
Lia Rikugun: :)
Europe Alchemi: its a challenge to ask myself for a change
quen Oh: :-) change needs support
Fael Illyar: what else is there but change?
Europe Alchemi: well the internet gives us the abbility to connect worldwide for a change :)
Adams Rubble: yes Fael :)

we forget to change ourselves before trying to change the world

Pema Pera: when we try to change the world, we often forget to change ourselves . . . . very easy to overlook, when you look *around* you
Pema Pera: we all make that mistake, I think, every day
Lia Rikugun: this is where it starts :)
Pema Pera: Hi ******
Fael Illyar: Hello ******
Lia Rikugun: hello ******
Lia Rikugun: please join us
Adams Rubble: Hello *****
Lia Rikugun: ou can just sit on a cussion
quen Oh: hi ******
Lia Rikugun: then you wont sink
******: hello
Europe Alchemi: Hello :)
Scathach Rhiadra: Hello ******
Lia Rikugun: have you been here before?
Lia Rikugun: maybe just try to sit on a seat
quen Oh: should be both... changing yourself and your direct environment, but also speaking up for change on a bigger scale, as we can (and some people in the wold cannot)
Scathach Rhiadra: I have to leave now, nice to meet you Europe, bye all:)
Lia Rikugun: bye scath
Pema Pera: bye Scathach!
quen Oh: bi Scath
Susi Alcott: hi ******
Adams Rubble: bye Scath :)
Europe Alchemi: Bye Scathach :)
Fael Illyar: See you later Scath :)
Pema Pera: yes, Quen
Lia Rikugun: ****** for all information you can visit our wiki http://playasbeing.wik.is/
Scathach Rhiadra: oh, tot ziens Nederlanders:)
Susi Alcott: C U scath
Pema Pera: haha, Scathach, wow!
Europe Alchemi: :))
Susi Alcott: _/!\_
quen Oh: tot ziens Scathach
Lia Rikugun: we are recordning your sessions, so is it ok if we include you too?
Lia Rikugun: <-******