2008.06.05 13:00 - Too Indoctrinated?

That afternoon, Storm was the main guardian. He sent me the following log complete with comments. The title of this entry, too, is Storm’s.

There was already a large group outside the tea house when I arrived on time for the 1pm meeting. Lot of greetings and a general consensus that it was too nice a day to be cooped up in the tea house so we all sat outside.

Delani Gabardini: Hi storm
Delani Gabardini: long time no see
Storm Nordwind: Hi
Moon Fargis: hi storm
Fael Illyar: Hi
Storm Nordwind: Yes indeed
Sigmund Schwarz: Hello, Storm and Adams.
Moon Fargis: ah hi adams
Adams Rubble: Hello everyone :)
Delani Gabardini: Hi adams
Delani Gabardini: come sit
Delani Gabardini: hi day
Storm Nordwind: Everyone want to stay out here? Or shall we go in the tea house?
Moon Fargis: lets stay out here:)
Moon Fargis: imo
Daydreamertje Littlething: nice to meet you all
Daydreamertje Littlething: hello
Delani Gabardini: i like it outside
Daydreamertje Littlething: please call me dreamer
Storm Nordwind: Then I promise not to turn the rain on!
Moon Fargis: hi dreamer :)
Delani Gabardini: sorry
Daydreamertje Littlething: oh LOL
Daydreamertje Littlething: sorry dont mean to be unpolite siting with my back to you
Storm Nordwind: A full house, and nice and early for PaB
Delani Gabardini: what time is PAB
Storm Nordwind: Right now

As often happens there were newcomers. So I attempted to put Play as Being in a nutshell. Except that, after a very long day (UK time), bits of the nut kept falling through the cracks!

Sigmund Schwarz: What is PaB?
Delani Gabardini: np dreamer
Storm Nordwind: PaB is Play as Being
Storm Nordwind: It is a project many of us are trying
Sigmund Schwarz: thank you.
Adams Rubble: thanks
Sigmund Schwarz: tell me more.
Storm Nordwind: And we meet 4 times a day to discuss things about it
Daydreamertje Littlething: and what do you do then
Storm Nordwind: or just chat
Storm Nordwind: Play as Being is an interesting idea that you may have done stuff similar before. or not!
Storm Nordwind: It involves trying to dissociate yourself with small notions of what you are
Storm Nordwind: And instead see what is behind it all
Storm Nordwind: what is presenting those appearances to you that you think are real
Delani Gabardini: kind of zen-like
Storm Nordwind: and then aiming to become that for a short time - playing with being Being
Sigmund Schwarz: I see.
Storm Nordwind: More like tantra in some ways
Storm Nordwind: What we do is a “time tax”
Storm Nordwind: we tax ourselves just 1%
Storm Nordwind: Every 15 minutes we stop for just 9 seconds
Storm Nordwind: a 9 second meditation if you like
Storm Nordwind: take a deep breath
Storm Nordwind: and play
Storm Nordwind: play as being Being

Delani was immediately engaged. She tried to relate it to her existing experiences with Zen.

Delani Gabardini: 9 secs of just being?
Storm Nordwind: more than that
Delani Gabardini: being our true selves
Delani Gabardini: is that it
Storm Nordwind: being the larger Self, the one self that is behind all self
Storm Nordwind: complicated words for a simple idea
Sigmund Schwarz: nodding
Delani Gabardini: so we zennies would say your true nature
Delani Gabardini: or Buddha nature
Storm Nordwind: yes they would
Delani Gabardini: ah
Delani Gabardini: i like that
Delani Gabardini: 9 secs is not a lot to do
Delani Gabardini: so it should be an easy one
Storm Nordwind: The regularity of every 15 minutes instead has its own power
Delani Gabardini: i see
Moon Fargis: to remember it every 15 min is the hard part
Delani Gabardini: yes - u need a timer
Storm Nordwind: Please may I refer you to a website about this

Dear old Isen, always an inspiring presence, had been dozing and awoke with a start. He took a look around him and exclaimed:

Isen Enzo: Holy smokes! look at all these avs!!!
Sigmund Schwarz: sure
Storm Nordwind: http://playasbeing.wordpress.com/
Isen Enzo: I nodded off…

Meanwhile I was making sure that everyone got the right steer to this very website.

Sigmund Schwarz: thank you.
Storm Nordwind: especially the “HINTS” page
Storm Nordwind: I’d go to that first
Delani Gabardini: i will check that out also
Storm Nordwind: The rest is very much a blog
Delani Gabardini: is that where pema’s blogs are
Storm Nordwind: It is a set of transcripts from these meetings
Storm Nordwind: yes
Delani Gabardini: yes - I read some of them
Delani Gabardini: good stuff
Storm Nordwind: And there are others (like mine) linked from there

With so many people, some of them new, I wanted to check for confidentiality concerns before carrying on.

Storm Nordwind: Before we continue may I ask a question of people who have not been here before?
Delani Gabardini: yes
Sigmund Schwarz: sure.
Storm Nordwind: Does anyone object to their name being mentioned as being here (in the blog)
Storm Nordwind: Or even what they said?
Sigmund Schwarz: Not me.
Delani Gabardini: i already gave pema permission to use mine
Adams Rubble: no
Storm Nordwind: Then that is fine. Everyone relax!
Isen Enzo: whew..

I wanted to take up Moon on his his earlier comment.

Storm Nordwind: Moon, you said the hardest part was the regularity. Would you like to say more?
Delani Gabardini: i have something to say since Moon is not answering
Storm Nordwind: Please do Delani

But Moon was elsewhere too!

Moon Fargis: ah sorry phone

So instead Delani had a pertinent question that I failed to address very well!

Delani Gabardini: how does one manage this in the rl - say in a meeting or even worse - as in my case in a lecture
Delani Gabardini: do we actually stop and reflect for 9 secs on being
Storm Nordwind: Well there are two answers there
Storm Nordwind: First we are doing more than reflecting on being. We are playing at being Being. Which some find has a different flavour.
Storm Nordwind: Second, the frequency - yes that can be hard. It can be unwise to aim for kensho (as I believe you Zennies say it) whilst driving for example!
Delani Gabardini: umm
Storm Nordwind: But with the frequency comes an awareness that you start to carry with you
Isen Enzo: kensho…
Storm Nordwind: It seems to be bubbling there behind things
Storm Nordwind: and that awareness can come to the fore with practice
Storm Nordwind: even in the midst of doing normal stuff
Delani Gabardini: i am having a little difficulty with this - let’s go back to my example
Storm Nordwind: Sure - probably my fault
Delani Gabardini: I am lecturing for an hour or more if i am participating in this what do I do every 15 mins
Storm Nordwind: For one thing, Pema suggested that people set aside just a couple of hours a day to start with when they tried this
Storm Nordwind: and not every waking moment
Delani Gabardini: ah - so eventually it becomes a natural state
Storm Nordwind: You can gradually extend it outwards as you feel
Moon Fargis: delani..lets say the exeptions aproves the rule
Storm Nordwind: He has a saying that the 9 seconds is bait on a hook

But at least we got there in the end, despite me! And as happens time and time again, one of us took a phrase and we all free-associated. Playing!

Delani Gabardini: ok - now is the time for me to do this as i am out of classes
Storm Nordwind smiles
Storm Nordwind: yes very likely!
Isen Enzo: school’s out?
Storm Nordwind: for summer?
Delani Gabardini: oh yes
Isen Enzo: woo hoo
Storm Nordwind: Moon - we need an Alice Cooper audio clip!
Isen Enzo: no more pencils,
Delani Gabardini: that is why I am on so much during the day - LOL
Moon Fargis: haha
Isen Enzo: no more books..
Delani Gabardini: yeah
Delani Gabardini: no more students
Isen Enzo: no more teacher’s dirty looks…
Storm Nordwind remembers playing this in a rock band
Delani Gabardini: storm - u were in a rock band!!!!
Storm Nordwind: er - yes, hummm
Isen Enzo: Tamborinist, myself…
Isen Enzo: former tamborinist..
Delani Gabardini: wow - we can form a little group - I can sign
Delani Gabardini: sing and sign - actually signing is better if u hear me sing
Moon Fargis lookes a bit confused… and listens to the birds
Delani Gabardini: sorry
Delani Gabardini: let’s get back on track says the teacher in me
Storm Nordwind: There is still a picture of me in a band on the web if you know where to look
Storm Nordwind: But you don’t!
Delani Gabardini: i am going to check this out
Moon Fargis: haha
Isen Enzo: we do!!
Moon Fargis: google makes it possible
Storm Nordwind: It is not linked.
Storm Nordwind: google cannot find the invisible
Isen Enzo: no form..

No one really wants to see or hear me play rock guitar and keyboard, surely? So we took a deep breath and got back to the serious stuff.

Delani Gabardini: so storm for us newbies at PAB do u recommend us reading the website first
Storm Nordwind: Yes I do
Storm Nordwind: I recommend the following page
Storm Nordwind: http://playasbeing.wordpress.com/hints-for-playing-as-being/
Storm Nordwind: that is the best one to start
Delani Gabardini: ok
Isen Enzo: going to look now…
Storm Nordwind: and shows a little of the method
Storm Nordwind: But the main thing is this…
Storm Nordwind: This is not a religion, it is an experiment in awareness
Storm Nordwind: You don’t have to be religious, especially you do not have to be Buddhist
Storm Nordwind: It is a way of knowing and being and developing awareness of what might be real as opposed to otherwise
Delani Gabardini: well actually u dont have to be buddhist to do zen
Delani Gabardini: we have christians who do zen at my temple
Delani Gabardini: they call it contemplative prayer or something like that
Storm Nordwind: quite so. But they are still Christian. And there are even Buddhists who call themselves atheists
Delani Gabardini: or agnostics
Storm Nordwind: The idea of this is it is beyond any belief system
Storm Nordwind: it is about playing
Storm Nordwind: and we all love to play

Amazing the assumptions we all make. Delani asked a great question and it was good for me to be brought back to considering the basics.

Delani Gabardini: describe playing for me
Delani Gabardini: please
Delani Gabardini: like in play-acting?
Storm Nordwind: No - not unless that is your idea of playing
Delani Gabardini: no
Storm Nordwind: It is losing oneself in an activity
Storm Nordwind: where one has less sense of self than normal
Storm Nordwind: and one is having too much fun to take oneself too seriously anyway

We were getting to the heart of the matter. And we got there with Isen providing little snippets of lyrics on the way! Delani came to an important realisation.

Delani Gabardini: but to me that goes back to my practice where we do work duties and do just that
Delani Gabardini: work becomes fun in a sense
Delani Gabardini: maybe I am too Buddhist for this - what do u think Isen?
Storm Nordwind: Perhaps this goes the other way for me. It starts with a sense of play that is applied to work rather than the other way round
Delani Gabardini: i don’t like to think of myself as closed but I am wondering
Delani Gabardini: but I still want to try it
Storm Nordwind: please share your wondering!
Isen Enzo: I wonder, wonder, wonder….
Delani Gabardini: I may be too indoctrinated in zen to entertain other concepts
Isen Enzo: WHO?
Adams Rubble: :)
Isen Enzo: Who wrote the book of love?….
Delani Gabardini: i don’t like to think that but maybe I am
Delani Gabardini: isen ha ha ha ha ha ha
Storm Nordwind: Then that is a wonderful realisation
Delani Gabardini: this may be the vehicle to find out, no?
Delani Gabardini: and perhaps open up a little
Delani Gabardini: to other possibilities
Storm Nordwind: It may be. This is about saying “What if” and “Why not” and doing it briefly every 15 minutes.

Dakini arrived and sat down on one of the benches.

Storm Nordwind: Hi Dakini
Isen Enzo: I passed out a note yesterday, I think about the concept of bringing awareness to whatever we do….
Delani Gabardini: i aplogogize I am dominating the conversation - Hi Dakini
Dakini Rhode: hi - so many people :-)
Sigmund Schwarz: Hello, Dakini.
Adams Rubble: Hi Dakini
Delani Gabardini: and one big mouth and it is not storm or isen

Did we really have that reputation? I looked at Isen in mock shock! Delani excused herself but I for one had found it fascinating and would welcome it again.

Fael Illyar: Hello Dakini :)
Dakini Rhode: haha
Dakini Rhode: our feet are sinking
Delani Gabardini: some others should have the opportunity to talk
Delani Gabardini: ty isen my dear one
Sigmund Schwarz: thanks, isen.
Isen Enzo: sure..
Adams Rubble: thanks
Isen Enzo: (I got a LOT of them)
Adams Rubble: :)
Storm Nordwind: Yes please. There are other people here with experience of PaB - not just me. What do they think about what Delani has said?
Storm Nordwind: Or who would like to describe their own PaB experiences?
Dakini Rhode: in a nutshell what did you say, Delani?
Delani Gabardini: i said I was concerned that i may be too zenacized to do the PaB exercise and that I just became a ware of that and I am not too comfortable with that
Delani Gabardini: I would like to think I am more open
Delani Gabardini: Dakini excuse but u are grey
Dakini Rhode: that is a good observation
Moon Fargis: well then take pab as micro zazens
Delani Gabardini: well I was not aware until we started talking and then it became too apparent
Dakini Rhode: it’s interesting to observe our thoughts and see where we might be stuck, or attached to a certain point of view
Delani Gabardini: yes
Delani Gabardini: thanks for that Moon
Dakini Rhode: not sure i can say more because i don’t know what it is to be zenacized

Somehow Dakini made it sound to me like a medical procedure! I shuddered.

Delani Gabardini: now u are colorizing
Fael Illyar: Delani, I think that’s actually how I do PaB myself.
Delani Gabardini: ah
Delani Gabardini: that is good to hear
Delani Gabardini: i would like the others have the opportunity to speak

It wasn’t going to be Isen. He had either drifted off again or had been distracted by people in his shop.

Moon Fargis: isen
Moon Fargis: isen!
Moon Fargis: ISEN!
Storm Nordwind: One thing you’ll find at these meetings is that the tone flips quite easily from the sublime to the ridiculous. And that’s part of the beauty of it
Delani Gabardini: he fell asleep
Moon Fargis: ~`~*Rooaarr*~`~
Dakini Rhode: somebody tickle isen
Storm Nordwind: He’s serving lattes to someone
Delani Gabardini: playing
Delani Gabardini: smile
Dakini Rhode: my connection here goes in and out
Dakini Rhode: signal too weak
Delani Gabardini: u still in a hotel?
Dakini Rhode: yes
Delani Gabardini: aj
Delani Gabardini: ah
Delani Gabardini: that is

Adams wanted to clear up the point about being stuck.

Adams Rubble: So we play what if we weren;t stuck?
Moon Fargis: stuck where?
Daydreamertje Littlething: i am stuck LOL
Adams Rubble: someone said something about being stuck….
Adams Rubble: or trapped in..
Adams Rubble: I am assuming we are stuck in behavior
Storm Nordwind: Ways of habitual thinking perhaps
Daydreamertje Littlething: i’m completly not understanding whereyou are talking about
Adams Rubble: yes
Delani Gabardini: excuse - brb
Daydreamertje Littlething: but its ok
Daydreamertje Littlething: its the language i think

Something I’d forgotten to mention having got carried away with the great conversation earlier. Records and blogs. And Moon made a fabulous detour into what could have been an in-joke and may have escaped some there (but was very funny nonetheless)!

Storm Nordwind: The thing is that this is not belief based. It’s a practice. You can do it without being stuck or with being stuck and it doesn’t matter
Storm Nordwind: You can just try it and see
Storm Nordwind: And keep on doing it
Storm Nordwind: And - here’s the thing i haven’t mentioned yet - you RECORD what your impressions are
Daydreamertje Littlething: well i will just sit and join
Daydreamertje Littlething: and see what happen
Storm Nordwind: So Pema recommends that people jot down what their impressions are after each 9 second meditation
Storm Nordwind: Just a word or a sentence
Storm Nordwind: People carry little notebooks to help that
Storm Nordwind: or they type it into a PC like I do
Storm Nordwind: Some people have started writing blogs of their impressions
Storm Nordwind: The recording seems to be useful in itself
Moon Fargis: hm i always got empty pages. ah darn zennie thing!
Dakini Rhode: lol
Storm Nordwind: And i thought you were a FULL Moon!
Delani Gabardini: u r at the top of your form Moon
Delani Gabardini: even if form is emptiness
Moon Fargis: storm: full and empty :)
Storm Nordwind: yes indeed!
Moon Fargis: thx delani :)
Storm Nordwind: But now we are cracking in-jokes
Dakini Rhode: empty full neither or both …
Delani Gabardini: yw
Storm Nordwind: The bell, by the way, marks 15 minutes
Storm Nordwind: And Moon’s wheel rotates in 9 seconds!
Moon Fargis feels alot of eyes on his body
Storm Nordwind: So I know Dakini and I have been recording some of our blog thoughts. I don’t know if Moon has. perhaps an empty web page that says 404?
Dakini Rhode: haha
Moon Fargis: haha i dont have a blog sorry
Moon Fargis: but that empty page is a good idea:)
Delani Gabardini: where do u blog
Storm Nordwind: You can blog wherever you like

Dakini reiterated Delani’s important realisation.

Dakini Rhode: and Delani has observed she is too zenacised to do PaB but she is uncomfortable with that because she would like to be more open
Dakini Rhode: that seems like a great observation to blog
Storm Nordwind: Anyone who wants to share their stuff, we put a link on the PaB page to it
Delani Gabardini: I would
Delani Gabardini: is this session recorded
Storm Nordwind: yes it is.
Delani Gabardini: then that will take care of it
Storm Nordwind: And since everyone said OK it will appear in a day or two at the address earlier
Delani Gabardini: great
Delani Gabardini: and we can read the other journals as well
Storm Nordwind: Sure. Some of us have been doing this for over 2 months so there’s a lot of stuff!
Dakini Rhode: mine goes periodically empty

Delani brought in Sig who had kept quiet for a while. We were glad she did.

Delani Gabardini: Sig what do u think of this concept?
Delani Gabardini: hmm
Sigmund Schwarz: Seems as if it’s practicing seeing everything as part of all that is.
Delani Gabardini: i think that is insightful
Storm Nordwind nods
Storm Nordwind: Pema has been very careful not to foist his opinions what what that might be on anyone
Sigmund Schwarz: From that viewpoint, it’s easier to generate compassion, patience and tolerance for others and for the stuff of our own that we don’t like.
Storm Nordwind: He just encourages everyone to experiment
Delani Gabardini: a true teacher
Storm Nordwind: And that is why recording and sharing at these meetings is so important
Dakini Rhode: may i speak on Pema’s behalf and say that Pema is not a teacher
Delani Gabardini: in rl i meant
Dakini Rhode: I think he might appreciate that :-)
Storm Nordwind: Yes I would agree with his feeling on that

dreamer woke up to something we mentioned earlier.

Daydreamertje Littlething: you are recording this?????
Dakini Rhode: we are all fellow travellers here
Daydreamertje Littlething: sorry i was afk for a short moment
Delani Gabardini: dreamer - yes it is being recorded
Daydreamertje Littlething: didnt knew that
Delani Gabardini: storm asked your permission before we started
Dakini Rhode: is that ok with you Daydreamer?
Storm Nordwind: I can delete all reference to you if you want Dreamer
Daydreamertje Littlething: must have missed that one
Daydreamertje Littlething: no its ok
Dakini Rhode: anything you don’t want in there we can take out

We had another late visitor. But there was nowhere else to sit, so I threw a cushion on the ground for him. The meeting was starting to become a kind of festive social.

Delani Gabardini: hi spock
Storm Nordwind: Hi again Spock
Spock Yuitza: hi all
Daydreamertje Littlething: i was just surprised
Dakini Rhode: well the chat is logged and then posted on the website
Dakini Rhode: those who were not here can read later
Isen Enzo: Hi Spock.
Daydreamertje Littlething: nice idea
Moon Fargis: hi spock
Delani Gabardini: how long does the PaB meeting go to
Moon Fargis: ormally 30 minutes:)
Dakini Rhode: 4:30
Storm Nordwind: 30 minute but some go for 60!
Dakini Rhode: oops 1:30
Delani Gabardini: I am sorry but when did we start today
Storm Nordwind: Depends on how much fun we’re having!
Dakini Rhode: i have time zone confusion
Daydreamertje Littlething: hahaha dakini you want a long meeting
Isen Enzo: We need a timeclock…
Storm Nordwind: We started when I arrived. Exactly on the hour
Dakini Rhode: :-)
Delani Gabardini: 1?
Storm Nordwind: yes
Isen Enzo: punch in..
Isen Enzo: punch out..
Delani Gabardini: wow - we have been at this for almost an hour
Storm Nordwind:
Isen Enzo: wax on..
Isen Enzo: wax off..
Storm Nordwind: Isen you want me to invoke the rain and soak people?
Daydreamertje Littlething: NOOOOO dont let it rain
Moon Fargis: guess what.. i am so long o sl but i didnt realized that the avatars are breathing
Isen Enzo: I’m impervious…..
Isen Enzo: ahahahahaha
Isen Enzo: I LAUGH at rain..
Moon Fargis: MUHAHAHA

Fools! Never taunt a storm bringer…

Storm Nordwind: we’ll see about that

…I uttered the magic words and down came a thundery deluge!

Delani Gabardini: i just realized the brething thing the other day
Moon Fargis: MUHAHAHA
Delani Gabardini: breathing
Isen Enzo: YOW!!
Moon Fargis: see rain gone
Delani Gabardini: umbrellas anyone
Moon Fargis: ah

dreamer had escaped and Dakini had unfurled an umbrella. Moon created a makeshift canopy and several people sheltered under it. I just sat and happily got soaked.

Daydreamertje Littlething: hahaha i am dry inside
Delani Gabardini: got another dakini
Isen Enzo: I could use an umbrella….
Delani Gabardini: i love rain
Moon Fargis: ~ *UMBRELLA* ~
Dakini Rhode: o dear, no copy
Delani Gabardini: what is that creature over by the small temple
Sigmund Schwarz: no problem
Isen Enzo: This case, though would call for a “parapluie”
Storm Nordwind: That’s Isen
Isen Enzo: not a “parasol”
Isen Enzo: the creature by the temple…
Sigmund Schwarz: someone dancing
Delani Gabardini: dreamer u can share dakini’s umbrells
Delani Gabardini: umbrella
Delani Gabardini: cool Moon
Daydreamertje Littlething: no thx
Delani Gabardini: can u move that over
Delani Gabardini: wow u read my mind
Daydreamertje Littlething: hmmm i’m little bit to much in mind
Delani Gabardini: guess we know each other too long
Isen Enzo: Gosh- the rain sounds remind me of RL- my home…
Delani Gabardini: well Moon and I are dry - oh and dakini too
Isen Enzo: But no thunder..
Daydreamertje Littlething: i will try to find a nice spot to meditate
Daydreamertje Littlething: thanks people for the talk
Isen Enzo: There is a zendo behind us….
Moon Fargis: try there day
Storm Nordwind: Thank you Dreamer
Daydreamertje Littlething: please please say dreamer
Isen Enzo: If anyone would like to sit…
Sigmund Schwarz: I’ll see you fine folks, later. Thanks for the uplifting time.
Daydreamertje Littlething: ah i will go and visit that next time
Delani Gabardini: nice to meet u sig
Moon Fargis: bye sig
Storm Nordwind: Yes please come again if you wish
Adams Rubble: bye Sig
Delani Gabardini: come again
Delani Gabardini: and to dakini’s sitting
Daydreamertje Littlething: i will try to find a spot back storm showed me once :) now
Daydreamertje Littlething: bye bye

The last question about time and venue went to Adams.

Adams Rubble: Do you meet here every day?
Fael Illyar: Ah, sorry I’ve been mostly afk this time.
Storm Nordwind: Four times a day
Adams Rubble: Oh, what times?
Storm Nordwind: 1/7/1/7 SLT
Adams Rubble: Thank you
Delani Gabardini: storm do we meet here or inside?
Storm Nordwind: Normally inside the tea house
Storm Nordwind: This is an exception
Storm Nordwind: Everyone wanted to stay outside!

And we started to break up and go to meditation, or to Skype, or to other pressing matters.