That morning I was able to get into SL, and to walk up to the tea house, but I could not stay long. In any case, Fael reminded me that she was the guardian that morning and later she sent me the complete chat log, together with her comments.
I had set my AV waiting at the teahouse 10 minutes earlier and had been AFK. I came back just in time to find Pema greeting me.
Pema Pera: Hi Fael!
Pema Pera: Greetings from Nagoya
Pema Pera: I’m in the bullet train, 新幹線、and I’m on my way to Kyoto
Fael Illyar: Hi Pema
Pema Pera: Wow, Adams!
Fael Illyar: Hi Adams
Pema Pera: Sister Adams?
Adams Rubble: Hi Fael
Fael Illyar: Ah, nun today?
Pema Pera: Looks nice!
Adams Rubble: Toning down the Buddhism today :)
Fael Illyar: I’ve been lazy about changing clothes lately :)
First we shuffle around with who is the guardian for the day
Adams Rubble: let me check that the log is recording
Faenik is a hairy black ball with eyes and ears.
Fael Illyar: It’s my turn as a guardian today
Pema Pera: Right now?
Fael Illyar: yes, I traded with Cal, remember?
Pema Pera: Ah! I forgot
Pema Pera: sorry about that
Pema Pera: it is so confusing with Japan being 3/4 day ahead of California
Pema Pera: with the date line . . . .
Pema Pera: okay, Adams, so you don’t have to worry then
Adams Rubble: OK
Pema Pera: Fael will capture the log!
Adams Rubble: The chat log disappeared from my lap top for some reason so I like to keep checking
Adams Rubble: I lost Sunday night’s log when you told me important things
Adams Rubble: and I was too tired to rememer them
Adams Rubble: so I am waiting to see it posted
Pema Pera: Sunday, let’s see, that was the 15th, that is up now!
Fael Illyar: was that IM or here?
Fael Illyar: … oh wait, I’m not thinking :)
Pema Pera: http://playasbeing.wordpress.com/2008/06/15/an-incredible-seven-days/
Adams Rubble: That was chat…but the whole folder for second life disappeared
Adams Rubble: Oh thanks Pema
Fael Illyar: whole folder? … ok, that’s strange
Pema Pera: the title was taken from your remark :=)
Adams Rubble: :)
Pema Pera: your first week :-)
Pema Pera: well, the train is picking up speed now
Pema Pera: and tunnels are looming up
Pema is about to lose internet connection and bids us goodbye for now.
Fael Illyar: might be a good idea to take backups of the logfiles every morning or night :)
Pema Pera: so I’ll have to say good bye for now
Pema Pera: yes indeed
Fael Illyar: Ok, see you Pema :)
Adams Rubble: OK good to see you Pema
Pema Pera: bfn!
Adams Rubble: bye
Fael Illyar: I haven’t had problems with logs disappearing though
Adams Rubble: Your using the cool version :)
Adams Rubble: and Linux
Fael Illyar: shouldn’t make that much of a difference but you never know.
Adams Rubble: I was thinking my laptop mught have cleared temp files to make room
Fael Illyar: I do have to remember to check the log settings every time I upgrade to new version though. Those get turned off for some reason
Adams Rubble: It was gone on MOnday
Fael Illyar: you should be able to tell SL where to put the logs
Adams Rubble: I did now
Fael Illyar: ah, good :)
Finally done discussing technical issues.
Adams Rubble: Last night this little girl showed up at the meeing
Adams Rubble: I forget her name it was something like Sufail or something like that
Adams Rubble: she lives in the community here
Adams Rubble: she was very funny
Adams Rubble: she did all kinds of little kid stuff
Adams Rubble: and then started spouting these profound statements
Fael Illyar: interesting :)
Adams Rubble: at one point she said Fred reminded her of her college professor who had taught Paul Tillich :)
Adams Rubble: I almost fell over :)
Fael Illyar: :)
Faenik is a hairy black ball with eyes and ears.
Adams Rubble: Hi Faemik
Adams Rubble: Do you see a big blue ball on my lap?
Fael Illyar: nope
Adams Rubble: i DO. LET ME RESET
Faenik: Hello Adams.
Adams Rubble: Ah that’s better
Fael Illyar: :)
Fael Illyar: :)
Adams Rubble: Very peaceful here this morning
Fael Illyar: uuh, I just noticed I was close to running low on disc space. meaning, I only have log from before that in my backlog.
Then I noticed my hard drive was full so the log wasn’t getting written anymore. Good thing I checked so I could cut&paste from the visible backlog.
Adams Rubble: so you’re not recording now?
Fael Illyar: no, I am again
Adams Rubble: Did you get the beginning?
Fael Illyar: I can still cut&paste it
Adams Rubble: OK, otherwise I will have it :)
Adams Rubble: Pema’s suggestion probably is a good one
Fael Illyar: ok, saved
Fael Illyar: which one?
Adams Rubble: to save after each session
Adams Rubble: that would keep the big one cleaned out of garbage
Fael Illyar: :)
Sky arrives and I suddenly remember that I had noticed something the very same morning. (this meeting is 5pm in Finland)
Fael Illyar: I prefer logging everything
Fael Illyar: Hi Sky
Adams Rubble: Hi Sky
Sky Szimmer: hi there
Fael Illyar: I noticed something interesting today about meditating.
Sky Szimmer: yes?
Adams Rubble: yes?
Fael Illyar: this is going to sound a bit confusing and conflicting but … If I don’t feel like meditating, but force myself anyway, it doesn’t seem to succeed properly, I end up being distracted. However, if I want to but feel reluctant to but do it anyway, it works perfectly.
Adams Rubble: That makes sense
Adams Rubble: I am having a slightly different experience
Faenik is a hairy black ball with eyes and ears.
Adams Rubble: I am finding I can do breath meditation any time I want
Adams Rubble: But when I do it in the 9 seconds I just get relaxed and sort of brain dead except for the awareness of my physcial presence
Adams Rubble: So today I am goijg back and forth between my old routine and the new one
Adams Rubble: One of the tapes on the dharmatalks.org site was very helpful
Sky Szimmer: i don’t quite understand what you mean about the feeling reluctant but do anyway part Fael
Fael Illyar: It’s hard to explain …
Sky Szimmer: pls try
Adams Rubble: Do you feel like is something you SHOULD do?
Fael Illyar: that’s in the first case, the reason why I forced it
Fael Illyar: doesn’t work
Sky Szimmer: yes. forced meditation doesn’t work but sometimes, resistance is normal and maybe we have to force the issue a bit at first
Sky Szimmer: to break through the resistance
Faenik: なるほど^^
Fael Illyar: I did that this morning, then 2 and half hours later, having felt a bit unhappy not managing it properly, I ended up wanting to do it and tryed again and managed it very well
Fael Illyar: I was reluctant to do it, but still wanted to
Fael Illyar: conflicting wants I guess
Sky Szimmer: that could easily happen, i think
Sky Szimmer: our mind gamees
Adams Rubble: I would think that probably natural and you are learning about yourself and meditation
Adams Rubble: Sky, I am not sure I met you before today
Sky Szimmer: i have met you before Adams
Adams Rubble: Would you tell us about yhow you meditate?
Sky Szimmer: but we haven’t chatted in depth
Sky Szimmer: i don’t do much sitting meditation anymore.
Sky Szimmer: but if i sit, i meditate
Adams Rubble: I am so mixed up with people right now, please excuse me…all the names are running together yet
With as many people as do regularly attend these meetings, it is quite confusing at first to tell everyone apart.
Sky Szimmer: not at all. Adams. I keep changing shape and form right now as I experiment
Sky Szimmer: besides there are so many of us
Adams Rubble: I am a bit different today. hehe
Sky Szimmer: i have found that it just takes a lot of practice with meditation and not to judge how our meditation is
Fael Illyar: took me some time to remember people too … well, still does :)
Sky Szimmer: that seems to make meditation worst
Sky Szimmer: if i get distracted, i usually just accept that i am distracted
Sky Szimmer: try to sit a bit longer and see if i can bring my mind back to the breath. if not,
Sky Szimmer: i stand up and do some meditation
Adams Rubble: ahh, the moving meditation?
Sky Szimmer: if that doesn’t work, i just sit and get distracted, but with always the intention of bringing my mind back to the breath
Sky Szimmer: then the sitting is just mixed with some distraction, some mindfulness
Sky Szimmer: but that is ok
Sky Szimmer: yes. I studied with Stim for some time now
Faenik is a hairy black ball with eyes and ears.
Sky Szimmer: I use to go every week, but now I hang out with him monthly, but recently not even that
Sky Szimmer: he hosts a weeked meditation session every month
Sky Szimmer: so we have some sessions of sitting, then a short session of standing, then sitting
Sky Szimmer: the energy is different with each
Adams Rubble: Thank you, that is very helpful
Sky Szimmer: oh. i am gald
Sky Szimmer: g;ad
Sky Szimmer: glad
Adams Rubble: :)
Standing meditation sounds interesting so that gets some more attention.
Fael Illyar: standing meditation… I guess I should try that too :)
Adams Rubble: I did that inadvertantly
Sky Szimmer: yes. you just stand there
Adams Rubble: I was at Dakini’s meditation group here
Sky Szimmer: sometimes people like to extend their arms out in front of them
Adams Rubble: and the dehumidifier fileld up and started beeping
Adams Rubble: filled
Adams Rubble: I tried to concentrate through it but it was too distracting
Adams Rubble: so I got up and emptied it
Adams Rubble: trying to maintain my concentration while doing so
Adams Rubble: not completely successful
Adams Rubble: but better than the alternative
Adams Rubble: hehe
Sky Szimmer: what dod you mean by maintain your concentration while doing so?
Sky Szimmer: and not being successful?
Adams Rubble: :)
Sky Szimmer: what did you have in mind?
Adams Rubble: I wasn;t completely focused
Sky Szimmer: on emptying the dehumidifier
Adams Rubble: I had to go through the motions of the task
Faenik loves wells!
Sky Szimmer: or on your breath
Adams Rubble: I wasn’t doing breath meditation yet then
Sky Szimmer: oh.
Sky Szimmer: sorry
Adams Rubble: I don;t completely remember what I was focused on
Sky Szimmer: ah.
Adams Rubble: wouldn’t recommend it :)
Adams Rubble: but for me it was necessity
Fael Illyar: The first meditation I did today, I found myself getting distracted by almost anything at all.
Sky Szimmer: well, i don’t do formal sitting meditation but I meditat
Stargate arrives.
Sky Szimmer: meditate
Fael Illyar: Usually, when I meditate, if I get an itch somewhere, I manage to ignore it until it goes away.
Sky Szimmer: hi Star
Adams Rubble: Hello Star
Stargate Tone: Hello all
Adams Rubble: That’s good Fael
Adams Rubble: Star, we are talking about meditation today
Fael Illyar: This morning I was scratching if I got an itch before I noticed it.
Adams Rubble: :)
Sky Szimmer: about how distraction comes into the meditation
Fael Illyar: Oh, Hi Star :)
Adams Rubble: I imagine itches could become part of ones consciousness
Adams Rubble: and become something that started happening
Sky Szimmer: yes. i can see how itching can be meditative
Sky Szimmer: my baby son finds it so
Sky Szimmer: : )
Adams Rubble: :)
Fael Illyar: :)
Stargate Tone: …rolling back the lines
Sky Szimmer: ? Star?
Adams Rubble: Since I am new to meditation it is very helpful to hear other people’s experiences
Stargate Tone: done
Stargate Tone: yes ?
Faenik loves wells!
Sky Szimmer: how long have you been meditating?
Adams Rubble: me? probably about a week
Fael Illyar: 2 weeks, maybe
Sky Szimmer: you seem to have a good grasp : )
Adams Rubble: but when I discovered breath meditation
Adams Rubble: I realized I have been doing it
Adams Rubble: fopr years and years
Sky Szimmer: ah. a natural
Adams Rubble: whithout knowing what it was
Fael Illyar: I think I’ve been doing something similar to meditation for years too.
Adams Rubble: so it has made me very comfortable
Adams Rubble: I could go for a long time doing that
Fael Illyar: Although, not knowing it was close and not really able to do it on a whim.
Sky Szimmer: well, then, you are not so “new”
Adams mentions a site with spoken material to help with meditation.
Adams Rubble: Last night I listened to this tape on the dharmatalk.org site
Fael Illyar: or at will
Adams Rubble: in which the person coached through a long process
Sky Szimmer: what do you mean Fael by close?
Adams Rubble: focusing first on the nose, chest and stomach
Fael Illyar: close to meditation
Adams Rubble: and then started slowly moving around the body
Adams Rubble: I described it on my log this morning
Adams Rubble: I think it would take about an hour to do the whole process
Sky Szimmer: i have found that it is good to learn different methods of meditation
Sky Szimmer: it becomes tools that we can lean on
Adams Rubble: yes I want o know about the others
Adams Rubble: sorry I interrupted Fael
Fael Illyar: It’s hard to interrupt in a text based chat.
Adams Rubble: I manage to do it :)
Fael Illyar: the only way you will succeed is if what you say is more interesting
Adams Rubble: :)
Stargate Tone: **
Another topic I’d recalled earlier today popped into my mind again and since it seemed conversation was about to die out, I decided to try if that would get new one started.
Fael Illyar: To return the subject to negative (?) feelings again. I’ve been easily annoyed by small children making a show in shops trying to get their way in the past.
Faenik: could be
Stargate Tone: well; based on what this phenomena has been even growing, cuz parents are teached to take them children to be god…
Fael Illyar: When I was buying groceries about a week ago, there were 3 small children all making noise non stop. Initially I was annoyed with it but eventually it started changing to being amused with myself.
Stargate Tone: no wonder half of our nation also is eating drugs for the depression
Faenik: could be
Sky Szimmer: yes. i see my child as a rinpoche, a recarnated being here to teach me things
Sky Szimmer: yes. Fael. what changed
Stargate Tone: so You could take Youself up to it…but…well:::How You think that them parents can do that
Sky Szimmer: were you amused with yourself being annoyed or were you amused by the children
Fael Illyar: amused with myself being annoyed.
Stargate Tone: and most of the people are living just the normal interacitvity with this pehnomena soo
Sky Szimmer: oh. that seems to be a good thing
Adams Rubble: mindfulness!!!
Fael Illyar: with no intention of letting that annoyance show
Stargate Tone: yea
Stargate Tone: to laugh to onesefl :)***
Sky Szimmer: what do you mean by not having intention of letting that annoyance show?
Fael Illyar: Well, I wasn’t about to go silence the children :P
Sky Szimmer: you mean, you didn’t want to seeem annoyed? or you didn’t what that annoyance to be
Stargate Tone: cuz SOME ppl the most likely has noticed also Faels responding :=
Stargate Tone: :)*
Stargate Tone: …dont have much imagination, but can almost see the ’show’ there’s been
Sky Szimmer: you can always ask them to quiet down some
Stargate Tone: well…in Finland…oh no
Stargate Tone: You can get police to Your neck for such
Stargate Tone: we have had must even chnage our naturall language for new ‘orders’
Then we get some criticism of how things are in Finland.
Sky Szimmer: well. I got to go. much to do. nice chatting with you all
Stargate Tone: how to behaved in publick :)***
Stargate Tone: oh …sad…
Fael Illyar: Yes, try to tell random mother that their child is being too noisy and they’ll be mightily annoyed.
Adams Rubble: Good to see you Sky. Bye :)
Stargate Tone: Have Good Time where ever Your going :)
Fael Illyar: Ok, See you Sky :)
Sky Szimmer: thanks : )
Adams Rubble: Well the situation can be a difficult one Fael
Faenik: why not?
Adams Rubble: Sky was making an interesting disctinction
Stargate Tone: dont indeed mean to say, that there wouldn’t be something to do….but if in the publick situation; donno about ttat
Fael Illyar: Well, I ended up not paying any attention after a while of being amused at myself.
Stargate Tone: yea
Adams Rubble: It is good there was a positive outcome :)
I forgot to emphasize that I told this story because I wanted to add another thing to the list of positive changes PaB (and meditation) has achieved.
Fael Illyar: interesting distinction?
Adams Rubble: Yes
Stargate Tone: well…wanna hear what I’ve been doing for such famiies in which the children or a child as taken as god ?
Adams Rubble: let me look back….
Fael Illyar: Sure, lets hear it :)
Adams Rubble: yes, she was leading you to your motive
Stargate Tone: depended of the persons; to some mother’s I’ve said; pls dont be a slave
Adams Rubble: whetehr you were concerned about looking annoyed…
Adams Rubble: or being annoyed
Adams Rubble: the answer can be helpful to you
Adams Rubble: for the next time
Adams Rubble: or similar situation
Adams Rubble: mindfulness!!!
Fael Illyar: Yes, mindfulness does come into pretty much every situation :)
Adams Rubble: :)
Stargate Tone: yes; and that’s more than good to get up from such onself; that’s one way to create some ‘cut’ to the ‘cirele’ of these phenomena normally created negative circrles
Stargate Tone: yet…as there’s so much such more, than people like you Fael
Stargate Tone: I’ve decided already long time ago to ‘interrupt’ the source…
Stargate Tone: that parents would remember the needed limits to children too
Adams Rubble: I wonder if it would be helpful if Stargate said that in Finish. I won’t mind
Fael Illyar: Well, one of the reasons I didn’t want to do anything was that the children were making that much noise pretty much because they weren’t getting what they wanted.
Stargate Tone: I also have noticed, that each time there’s a possibility to tell to the child who beats, that such kind of behavier is foolish
Stargate Tone: and thtat’s also alwasy been succesfull…as no child either want to ‘confess’ to be a fool :)***
Adams Rubble: I think the crux of the situation is
Fael Illyar: :)
Adams Rubble: that the children’s behavior is the parent’s responsibilty
Adams Rubble: for the most part
Adams Rubble: and that the example is more
Adams Rubble: that it is one in which we do not have complete control
Stargate Tone: and indeed; in case You would’ve done something there , you the most likely would’ve been ’stoned’ by other peple
Adams Rubble: except for our own reaction
Adams Rubble: and so we focus on our response
Stargate Tone: yea
Stargate Tone: often thought, that our kind of ppl are even sended to ‘meet’ for example this kind of negative shows
Stargate Tone: to be that ’somebody’ who at least makes that ‘cut’ on the spiritual level
Fael Illyar: Yes, I’ve been thinking along the lines of “You can’t change the world, but you can change yourself” for a few years now.
Adams Rubble: which is why I am ere :)
Faenik loves wells!
Adams Rubble: here
Pema comes back …
Fael Illyar: Welcome back Pema :)
Adams Rubble: Hi Pema :)
Stargate Tone: well; nobody can change the world; but all do have possibility to help people to make the change together
Stargate Tone: Hello Pema
Adams Rubble: We have been talking about meditation for the first part
Pema Pera: Hi Adams, Fael, Stargate!
Stargate Tone: meaning by that change, that people could learn to be mroe and more naturall/truthfull
Adams Rubble: then we began talking about our reaction to a situation like disruptive children
Stargate Tone: and create less and less ‘things’ based on fears
Stargate Tone: like for examplte thinging these situations
Stargate Tone: as they are created only based on fears
Stargate Tone: cuz the parents are nowadays so afraid of ‘millions’ of things to happen bad
Fael Illyar: yes, the culture of fear
Stargate Tone: in case they dont let there children to BE the ‘god’
Pema Pera: would love to hear more about that but . . . while I’ve just returned home now, from the train station in Kyoto, in one minute I have to attend an astronomy meeting
Pema Pera: hard to weave SL and RL in my life . . . . .
Pema Pera: so sorry to say:
Adams Rubble: yes :)
Pema Pera: hello and goodbye for now !
Adams Rubble: bye again pema :)
Fael Illyar: Bye Pema :)
Stargate Tone: bye
Pema Pera: next time I hope to have more leisure!
Pema Pera: see you all soon!
Stargate Tone: we’ll meet again :)***
… and leaves right away for another meeting.
Adams Rubble: poof!
Stargate Tone: **
Adams Rubble: I think I have to get back to RL too
Stargate Tone: well; thankfully the spirit can be in many places at the same ‘time’
Adams Rubble: The hour has passed quickly
Fael Illyar: Yes, it has. See you later Adams :)
Adams Rubble: You too Fael
Adams Rubble: bye Star
Stargate Tone: was nice to see You too again; I also was late…
Stargate Tone: You’de like to stay still ?
Fael Illyar: If there’s still something to talk about. :)
Stargate Tone: I have few moments left in case You wanna chat a while more
Stargate Tone: well
Stargate Tone: not so huge curious; just willing to know :)****
Stargate Tone: but…take that You said Ur from Finland too ?
Stargate Tone: ok
The conversation didn’t actually end here but the rest is in Finnish.
