Maxine was the guardian that afternoon. She sent me the following log, with her comments. The title of this session is hers too.
When I got to the teahouse, Riddle Sideways and Adams Rubble were already outside where I soon joined them.
Riddle Sideways: we are only ones here?
Maxine Walden: hi, Riddle, think so right now
Adams Rubble: So far. I am having wierd problems
Adams Rubble: Hi Maxine
Riddle Sideways: want to talk about it? :))
Maxine Walden: you outside?
Riddle Sideways: yes
Adams Rubble: Oh you inside?
Adams Rubble: I just got thrown across the creek
Maxine Walden: yes, I’m inside, but could easily come out
Riddle Sideways: we could come in
Maxine Walden: why don’t I do that, I will come out
Adams Rubble: I might not be able to get in :)
We all took a few moments to ask and to share about our experiences on this Father’s Day Sunday
Riddle Sideways: was there are guardian meeting this morning?
Adams Rubble: Yes….about the logo
Riddle Sideways: sorry I missed it
Neela Blaisdale: Nice to meet you
Adams Rubble: There is a copy on the group page
Riddle Sideways: yes, Neela
Maxine Walden: hi, Adams
Adams Rubble: Hi Neela
Adams Rubble: Hi Maxine
Maxine Walden: hi, Neelo
Neela Blaisdale: Hi Adams
Neela Blaisdale: Hi Maxine
Riddle Sideways: I have none of the opinoins others seem to
Riddle Sideways: and I needed sleep
Adams Rubble: No I didn;t either
Maxine Walden: what do you mean, Riddle and Adams, not the same opinions as others, if Maxine Walden feel free to mention?
Riddle Sideways: being fathers day, I was waiting for breakfast in bed
Riddle Sideways: that never came
Adams Rubble: :)
Maxine Walden: oh, how dissappointing!
Adams Rubble: I didn;t have as STRONG an opinion as the others
Maxine Walden: oh, sorry, did not get the inflection
Adams Rubble: I have lots of lag thought
Adams Rubble: Hoping it goes away
Adams Rubble: Happy Gather’s Day Riddle
Adams Rubble: Father’s
Riddle Sideways: TY
Maxine Walden: yes, happy Father’s Day
Riddle spoke of what turned out to be a lovely Father’s Day gift, a meaningful discussion with his son
Riddle Sideways: Actually had a very good talk with my 21yr old son
Riddle Sideways: yesterday
Riddle Sideways: on the way to the airport
Maxine Walden: oh?
Riddle Sideways: he is doing summer internship in DC
Riddle Sideways: and switching from engineering to Pol.Sci
Maxine Walden: ah, such a conversation can be a great gift…and quite a shift for him it seems
Adams Rubble: DC sounds like a good place for that
Adams Rubble: Yes it is good to talk with our sons and daughters
Maxine Walden: yes, DC should be a great place for those interests
Riddle Sideways: he wanted to know all about my politics
Adams Rubble: :)
Riddle Sideways: and why and how I got there
Riddle Sideways: it was a great conversation
Maxine Walden: oh, wow!
Adams Rubble: :)
Maxine Walden: it is gratifying when our children seem really interested in what we as their parents, what our journey has been
Riddle Sideways: sorry, don’t mean to monopolize chat
Adams Rubble: np
Maxine Walden: not a monopoly at all, especialy on this Father’s Day
Adams Rubble: :)
And Riddle then mentions a gift he may be giving to his son as well
Riddle Sideways: we went a long time on a trait I have that impresses and imbrasses him
Riddle Sideways: at the same time
Maxine Walden: oh?
Riddle Sideways: I talk to strangers
Riddle Sideways: everywhere
Riddle Sideways: I get bored in lines
Adams Rubble: :)
Riddle Sideways: so I start conversations with strangers
Riddle Sideways: I crack stupid jokes as ice breakers
Maxine Walden: which could be very interesting…
Adams Rubble: Some of us wish we could do that
Riddle Sideways: I meet the most amazing people
Adams Rubble: so it pays off
Riddle Sideways: they have been to places I only dream of
Maxine Walden: I can imagine that you do meet some interesting people
Riddle Sideways: yes, it has paid and paid off
Maxine Walden: wonderful
Riddle Sideways: but it embrasses a teenager with me
Adams Rubble: :)
Adams Rubble: He’ll remember that and reasure that
Adams Rubble: treasure
Adams Rubble: if he is going into politics he’ll need to learn it :)
Maxine Walden: a shy teen who might wish to hide a bit ?
Riddle Sideways: that’s what we talked about
Maxine Walden: sounds like a very fruitful conversation
Riddle Sideways: I was shy or at least not out-going at his age
Riddle Sideways: I started getting rewards from strangers around 19+
Maxine Walden: strangers helped a shy teen out…
Riddle Sideways: picking up hitchhikers was a great treasure
Riddle continues about the gift of openness which has enriched him as well as others
Riddle Sideways: it kept me awake and
Riddle Sideways: I met stories
Maxine Walden: ah…
Maxine Walden: many stories, likely
Riddle Sideways: yes
Riddle Sideways: there is a boredom of standing in a line at Disney
Riddle Sideways: that can be beaten
Riddle Sideways: by meeting the person behind you
Riddle Sideways: then you see them 2 hours later
Riddle Sideways: and have a friend
Riddle Sideways: once they open
Maxine Walden: yes
Maxine Walden: sorry, I may have interrupted your thought
Riddle Sideways: they will tell me things they wouldn’t tell their wife
Riddle Sideways: but it is mostly the stories
Adams Rubble: that’s a good trick
Maxine Walden: that is so interesting…sort of like passengers on the airplane
Riddle Sideways: exactly
Riddle Sideways: spent 5 hours with your fellow passenger
We wondered about the phenomenon of speaking more freely with ’strangers’ or ‘new friends’ than with intimates, shortly followed by parents’ bittersweet thoughts about their children as well as the pride in their growth.
Maxine Walden: perhaps new freinds without baggage so to speak, emotional baggage from one’s point of view
Riddle Sideways: embrass my teenager
Maxine Walden: he not so trusting of the openness?
Riddle Sideways: in between now
Maxine Walden: ah
Riddle Sideways: he sees the point now
Riddle Sideways: especially now
Riddle Sideways: he is going off to a place where he knows nobody
Riddle Sideways: and wants to make a good impression
Maxine Walden: really? rather brave, knows nobody in DC
Riddle Sideways: yet, not boast
Riddle Sideways: and not shy
Maxine Walden: and has your example to follow
Riddle Sideways: and bad examples too
Maxine Walden: hehe
Adams Rubble: Is this his first time away?
Riddle Sideways: he prolbably will not just start laughing at somebodies tie
Riddle Sideways: well, no he has been off many times
Riddle Sideways: at college for 2 years
Adams Rubble: It is bittersweet when they go off
Riddle Sideways: Israel for .5 year
And the comings and goings in terms of ties and emotions
Maxine Walden: imagine you will be thinking a lot about him this summer
Riddle Sideways: cel phones and IM make him close
Adams Rubble: Yes communications are much easier
Maxine Walden: oh, yes, ways to stay in close touch
Maxine Walden: and emotionally as well in close touch
Riddle Sideways: yes, but sure am glad he is not living in our house this summer
Adams Rubble: :)
Riddle Sideways: Love him, but can’t live around him
Riddle Sideways: my daughter is a different story
Maxine Walden: so yes, can better love with a little distance
Riddle Sideways: I don’t want her to leave all summer
Maxine Walden:You would like her to stay for the summer?
Riddle Sideways: I like being with her
Maxine Walden: interesting the differences…isn’t it?
Riddle Sideways: they are very different children
Riddle Sideways: from the same parents
Maxine Walden: oh, yes
Riddle Sideways: how does thatwork?
Adams Rubble: Yes, individuals each
The individuality of each child, the questions parents face, closenesses and distances…
Maxine Walden: interesting question, such different individuals from the same parents
Adams Rubble: Who knows how that happens
Adams Rubble: makes life interesting
Adams Rubble: feel bad for the shy ones
Riddle Sideways: do either of you have kids?
Adams Rubble: We have 2 sons and 3 daughters
Adams Rubble: 2 daughters
Adams Rubble: 4
Riddle Sideways: wow, full house
Adams Rubble: 2 away, 2 home
Riddle Sideways: far away?
Adams Rubble: One married in California, one in Milwaukee for summer
Adams Rubble: We’re on east coast
Riddle Sideways: we are in california and all of our family/relations are east
Riddle Sideways: I know the distance
Adams Rubble: yes, crazy country
And then, for some reason, feeling self-conscience in terms of ‘discussions re PaB’ I briefly alter the direction of the natural commentary
Maxine Walden: I find myself, as PaB greeter, wondering if we might also share our experiences, how things are going? Does that interrupt Father’s day thoughts?
Adams Rubble: np
Riddle Sideways: np
Maxine Walden: (Uh oh, stopped the conversation)
Adams Rubble: Of course I am laid out on my blog :)
Riddle Sideways: :)
Riddle Sideways: trying to think of proper wording
Adams Rubble: :)
And then Riddle appropriately links the conversation thus far with often internal meanderings of PaB
Riddle Sideways: I think all that I have been babbling on about fits
Maxine Walden: ah…
Riddle Sideways: a little to retrospective
Riddle Sideways: but playing as different beings
Riddle Sideways: imagining how we shape children
Adams Rubble: ouch
Adams Rubble: big question
Maxine Walden: oh, yes, that is interesting…how we shape, or not perhaps…ourselves as well as our children perhaps?
And we recall our generation as young adults with an enthusiasm now also mostly in reminscence
Riddle Sideways: I am part of that generation that was going to change the world
Maxine Walden: me too
Adams Rubble: Yes, we didnt do all that well on that
Maxine Walden: right!!
Adams Rubble: became katerialistic instead
Adams Rubble: materialistic
Maxine Walden: humbling
Adams Rubble: yes
Adams Rubble: but the next generation is very promising
Adams Rubble: engaged with politics
Adams Rubble: engaged with social issues
Maxine Walden: perhaps our hopes go into our children, but in many ways the next generation, as you say does seem so engaged
Riddle Sideways: ah, so were we
Adams Rubble: we sort of gave up after 1968
Adams Rubble: never recovered
Riddle Sideways: I kept trying
Adams Rubble: but as a generation
Riddle Sideways: we went downhill
Adams Rubble: big cars, big houses
Adams Rubble: we knew better
Riddle Sideways: yep
Maxine Walden: do you think we gave in to despair?
Adams Rubble: interesting question
Adams Rubble: became disengaged
Adams Rubble: unmindful of our social responsibilities
Adams Rubble: but put much effort into our children (as a generation)
Adams Rubble: it seems
Riddle Sideways: yes, very interesting
Maxine Walden: more self centered perhaps, and then gave our hopes/zeal to our kids
Riddle Sideways: I don’t think gave in nor despair
Adams Rubble: apathy maybe
Maxine Walden: ah, after 1968?
Adams Rubble: maybe our generation was less active than it seemed. maybe it was a small group who were
Riddle Sideways: tired maybe
Adams Rubble: tired yes
Adams Rubble: no leaders anymore
Adams Rubble: to inspire
Riddle Sideways: most started working locally, which never ttranslated to globally
Adams Rubble: yes
Adams Rubble: I agree
And then we possibly came around full circle, thinking about the earlier comments on gifts to and from our children including our hopes for their continued growth and prosperity
Maxine Walden: and yet you are being an inspiration to your son, perhaps
Riddle Sideways: yes, that is what we talked about
Maxine Walden: and who knows maybe he will go global
Riddle Sideways: how we moved to small village and act locally
Riddle Sideways: maybe gave up on global government, change and results
Maxine Walden: remaining more on the personal scale, local, perhaps?
Riddle Sideways: at this point he has been doing global things
Riddle Sideways: as I did at his age
Maxine Walden: (just need to say that I need to go in about 3 min and will take the chatlog with me)
Riddle Sideways: Thanks
Riddle Sideways: I need to go too
Maxine Walden: you must be very proud of his doing global things
Riddle Sideways: meant not to stay so long
Riddle Sideways: a long honey-do list today
Maxine Walden: these conversations do seem to lose track of time, at least that is often my experience
Adams Rubble: yes too short
And we end our conversation with the gift of a father’s deserved pride in his son and his interests and involvements
Riddle Sideways: btw he is studentsfordarfur.org and 400,000 faces on facebook
Riddle Sideways: very proud
Adams Rubble: yes you should be
Maxine Walden: ok, I will go, very nice to talk and to share this Father’s Day with you; oh, yes, much to be proud of Riddle in your son, thank yo u so for sharing about him
Maxine Walden: bye for now
Riddle Sideways: bye now
