2008.09.14 07:00 - Watching Actions

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    Adams Rubble: Adams Rubble was the guardian and the notes are hers

    Adams Rubble: I arrived early at the pavilion because I could not log in from home. I sat for a while before Steffle arrived. Since it was her first time and she was the only person there, the introduction took some time

    Adams Rubble: Hello Steffle
    Steffie Denimore: hi
    Steffie Denimore: what is this place?
    Adams Rubble: This is a pavilion where meetings of the Play-as-Being group are held
    Steffie Denimore: oh
    Steffie Denimore: thank you
    Adams Rubble: We are a group that explores reality through 9 seoncd meditations every 15 minutes
    Steffie Denimore: I see
    Steffie Denimore: is there one going to start
    Steffie Denimore: or or you sitting here alone?
    Adams Rubble: Yes, there is one now but no else has arrived yet :)
    Adams Rubble: let me give you a notecard
    Steffie Denimore: haha you're kidding
    Steffie Denimore: ok
    Steffie Denimore: ty
    Adams Rubble: There is a website there with much more information about the group
    Steffie Denimore: ok I will look sometime
    Adams Rubble: I had a bit of trouble getting on SL this morning and it is possible others are having trouble too
    Steffie Denimore: it seems slow
    Adams Rubble: One thing, we keep a log of our meetings on the website. Do you have any objection to appearing there?
    Steffie Denimore: I guess not
    Adams Rubble: Thank you
    Steffie Denimore: not like we've said much
    Steffie Denimore: lol
    Adams Rubble: :)
    Adams Rubble: One certainly wants to be aware before they do say much :)
    Steffie Denimore: true
    Adams Rubble: We meet four times a day, very 6 hours, at 1, 7, 1 and 7
    Adams Rubble: that is SL time
    Adams Rubble: You are very new to SL
    Steffie Denimore: ok great
    Steffie Denimore: what all is there to do in sl?
    Steffie Denimore: I met a guy who buys me everything I want
    Steffie Denimore: lol
    Adams Rubble: :)
    Steffie Denimore: but am always bored
    Adams Rubble: I came in to SL looking for the art sites and then I found this group and I spend most of my time here
    Adams Rubble: One can find pretty much what they want
    Steffie Denimore: is there any other cool places?
    Adams Rubble: Do you know how to search places?
    Steffie Denimore: yes but I want more than shopping
    Steffie Denimore: it is fun
    Steffie Denimore: but sometimes you want to interact more
    Adams Rubble: I spent my first two weeks doing just shoppong :)
    Steffie Denimore: lol
    Steffie Denimore: well i lucked out
    Steffie Denimore: I met a guy who wanted to take me shopping
    Adams Rubble: You can use the search window to search for other things that interest you
    Steffie Denimore: he likes to watch me shop he says
    Steffie Denimore: lol
    Adams Rubble: :)
    Steffie Denimore: I can't argue that
    Steffie Denimore: I like to watch him watch me shop
    Steffie Denimore: lol
    Adams Rubble: What are your other interests?
    Steffie Denimore: I meditate some
    Steffie Denimore: thats why i came here
    Adams Rubble: Ah. There are a number of meditation places
    Steffie Denimore: yeah but I'm not sure about virtual meditation
    Adams Rubble: The Zen Retreat next door has one at 6 pm SLT
    Steffie Denimore: lol
    Steffie Denimore: maybe more discussion places
    Steffie Denimore: I don't know
    Steffie Denimore: I don't know what i want to do
    Steffie Denimore: that is the problem
    Adams Rubble: There is a new one with teaching. hold on. Let me see what landmarks I have
    Steffie Denimore: ok
    Gaya joined us here
    Steffie Denimore accepted your inventory offer.
    Steffie Denimore: thank you
    Steffie Denimore: looks like someone joined us
    Adams Rubble: You should have received four
    Adams Rubble: Hello Gaya, meet Steffle :)
    Gaya Ethaniel: _/!\_
    Steffie Denimore: 4 what?
    Steffie Denimore: I got one landmark
    Gaya Ethaniel: Lovely to meet you Steffie
    Steffie Denimore: hi gaya
    Adams Rubble: which one did you get?
    Steffie Denimore: you too
    Steffie Denimore: hikari
    Adams Rubble: OK
    Adams Rubble: Hmm. The others don't seem to be going. Maybe SL problem
    Faenik: なるほど^^
    Adams Rubble: There is a new place called the "Buddha Center" that is just opening which had teaching and a meditation center
    Adams Rubble: Then the Zen Retreat is another. You can search for these

    Steffle Crashed and lag put our following statements in the wrong order

    Gaya Ethaniel: Hm... yes it seems
    Adams Rubble: She left?
    Adams Rubble: How do you like that? Maybe she crashed
    Gaya Ethaniel: Seemed tped out
    Adams Rubble: Hmmmph
    Gaya Ethaniel: Ah well
    Adams Rubble: You look very nice today
    Gaya Ethaniel smiles. Thank you
    Gaya Ethaniel: Adams looks different with that hair/outfit
    Adams Rubble: Yes. But Couldn't change today. had trouble getting into SL
    Gaya Ethaniel: It's been real laggy yes
    Adams Rubble: I like this outfit though...and the hair :)
    Gaya Ethaniel smiles. Yes nice change.

    Gaya and I had talked away from PaB and I brought her up to date with my newest insight about myself

    Adams Rubble: I had a bit of settling down in the past 10 or so hours
    Adams Rubble: Last night at 7pm PaB session Adelene was talking about cause and effect. That is watching how nehavior follows thoughts
    Adams Rubble: behavior
    Gaya Ethaniel listens
    Adams Rubble: I had watched thoughts but never actions
    Adams Rubble: so I thought about the past two weeks and had a couple of insights
    Gaya Ethaniel listens
    Adams Rubble: One is that I saw the limitations of my "self" in dealing with RL groups. Just lack of experience and technique
    Adams Rubble: I realized that RL groups have a social function which is less than here in SL
    Adams Rubble: Here we can get right to ideas fairly quickly
    Gaya Ethaniel nods

    Kicking the dirt away

    Adams Rubble: The other part of my dream is that I realized that PaB has been strong under the dirt all along
    Faenik loves wells!
    Adams Rubble: I just have to kick the dirt a little and there it is right below the surface :)
    Gaya Ethaniel smiles
    Adams Rubble: So although I seemed to have lost sight of it
    Adams Rubble: It was strong as ever
    Adams Rubble: :)
    Gaya Ethaniel: That's how it goes most of time
    Gaya Ethaniel: One step forwards two steps back
    Adams Rubble: or vice versa :)
    Gaya Ethaniel nods
    Adams Rubble: although the three step kicks up the dirt more :)
    Gaya Ethaniel: Less stepping backwards as we continue the journey or yes, kick up moreo dirt <smile>
    Gaya Ethaniel: Have you watched behavours leading thoughts as well?
    Adams Rubble: No, this is new to me
    Gaya Ethaniel: It's rather refreshing doing the other around also.
    Adams Rubble: But I think that watching one's actions will be very helpful in accepting one's limitations
    Gaya Ethaniel nods

    Sorting selfs

    Adams Rubble: I separated *** from me in my dream
    Adams Rubble: That is *** is "self"
    Gaya Ethaniel listen
    Adams Rubble: I more or less said that *** just goes with the flow
    Faenik: why not?
    Adams Rubble: Faenik still is spouting wisdom
    Gaya Ethaniel smiles
    Gaya Ethaniel: How did *** take your suggestion?
    Adams Rubble: I don;t know if *** knows yet. hehe
    Gaya Ethaniel smiles. Sure *** does
    Adams Rubble: When I say "I", I think it is my inner self
    Adams Rubble: Adams not involved in this one
    Gaya Ethaniel: Inner self = Being?
    Adams Rubble: Hmmm. I haven't made that connection yet but very likely
    Adams Rubble: The person who was there at birth and will be there at death
    Adams Rubble: And yes *** is probably explaining this and thus knows
    Gaya Ethaniel: So Adams R and *** are being connected to this 'inner self'?
    Faenik is a hairy black ball with eyes and ears.
    Adams Rubble: We all are part of the *** corporation :)
    Adams Rubble: hehe
    Gaya Ethaniel: *** is a part of 'inner self' then?
    Adams Rubble: In this case *** is denoting the RL "self" not the inner self
    Adams Rubble: *** is a name given by parents

    Finding the inner self

    Gaya Ethaniel: If the inner self is Being... Adams R and *** are part of the inner self
    Faenik: why not?
    Adams Rubble: Well, may be, but for my understanding my thoughts, I see them separately
    Gaya Ethaniel listens
    Adams Rubble: My inner self does the witnessing
    Adams Rubble: Nisagargadatta says all memory comes from "self"
    Adams Rubble: The inner mind does the processing
    Gaya Ethaniel ponders on 'inner self/mind'
    Adams Rubble: The inner person is the real person, and in that sense Being
    Gaya Ethaniel listens
    Adams Rubble: When I watch my toughts, I can see them trying to cloud over what my senses are experiencing
    Adams Rubble: These thoughts come from memory
    Adams Rubble: and some of them go back to memory
    Gaya Ethaniel nods. I see thoughts as a mist...
    Adams Rubble: Yes
    Gaya Ethaniel should go get some canvas and paints
    Adams Rubble: :)

    Seeing thoughts

    Gaya Ethaniel: Please tell me more about the thoughts and your experiences. How they relate to each other.
    Adams Rubble: My blog is more detailed here but let me sum up a little
    Adams Rubble: I can see this happening best when I am walking in nature
    Adams Rubble: I walk along with trees, clouds, flowers, birds, water (rives, canals or ponds)
    Adams Rubble: Beautiful, lovely things
    Adams Rubble: But if I am bothered by something
    Adams Rubble: All I see are thoughts
    Adams Rubble: unless I inetervene and force them away
    Gaya Ethaniel wonders how Adams 'forces' thoughts away
    Adams Rubble: This happened on the walk right before my operation and only near the end did I realize it and start to use Storm's walking meditation to clear the air
    Adams Rubble: Yesterday I had my first walk in the woods since the operation
    Adams Rubble: (still do)
    Adams Rubble: and I had negative thoughts about the last two weeks
    Gaya Ethaniel listens
    Adams Rubble: so I remembered the previous walk
    Adams Rubble: and yesterday I was able to deal with it more effectively
    Adams Rubble: They kept coming the whole walk but I kept remembering and willed them away
    Faenik: why not?
    Adams Rubble: Other times, when I have been doing the seeing exercises which require me to look for the thoughts
    Adams Rubble: I can see them arising and going even more clearly
    Faenik: indeed?
    Gaya Ethaniel: What makes them to go away Adams?
    Adams Rubble: Some go away on their own. When I am doing a seeing exercise, I can will them away by concentrating on what I am seeing
    Adams Rubble: I think this is a meditation technique isn't it
    Adams Rubble doesn't know that much about meditation
    Gaya Ethaniel nods. Yes seeing/acknowledging/accepting them make them go away

    and seeing actions

    Adams Rubble: The new thing is getting detached from actions, from behavior and then being able to see where it is coming from, and where the limitations are
    Gaya Ethaniel nods. Yes what I am a second ago is different from what I am now
    Adams Rubble: I am excited about that
    Gaya Ethaniel: So accepting actions/thoughts (all in the past effectively) could become easier
    Adams Rubble: yes!
    Adams Rubble: I am not beating myself up because I am not effective in a RL group
    Adams Rubble: I have a choice to become better at it or avoid the groups, not fear them
    Adams Rubble: Not sure which I plan to do. hehe
    Gaya Ethaniel nods
    Gaya Ethaniel: Fine either waay you decide for sure
    Adams Rubble: yes gaya
    Gaya Ethaniel smiles

    Steffle Returns and we return to PaB introductions

    Adams Rubble: Hello Steffle
    Adams Rubble: :)
    Steffie Denimore: hey :-)
    Gaya Ethaniel: _/!\_
    Steffie Denimore: I crashed before
    Gaya Ethaniel: wb
    Adams Rubble: A shortcoming of SL, unfortunately
    Steffie Denimore: thanks
    Faenik: could be
    Adams Rubble: We all get used to surprises in SL; one never knows what might happen next :)
    Steffie Denimore: still rezzing
    Steffie Denimore: ok lol
    Gaya Ethaniel smiles
    Adams Rubble: An elephant or giraffe might pop in and start telling us about Budhism :)
    Gaya Ethaniel smiles
    Steffie Denimore: lol, what?
    Adams Rubble: You'll see in time :)
    Gaya Ethaniel nods
    Steffie Denimore: is this Buddhist?
    Adams Rubble: No, there are many Buddhists in our group but thi includes all religions or no religions. It is based on scientific pronciples
    Steffie Denimore: k
    Adams Rubble: I came looking for Buddhism and ended up using Christian metaphors to understand myself better
    Steffie Denimore: I'm not real religious
    Adams Rubble: Most of us aren't but want to understand ourselves better
    Steffie Denimore: seems that is always the question isn't it?

    What is a visit among friends without a misunderstanding. Steffle gets right to the heart of the matter and I miss it

    Steffie Denimore: who are we?
    Adams Rubble: The stopping many times during the day allows us to beserve what we are doing and sometimes break habits
    Adams Rubble: We are the Play-as_being group
    Adams Rubble: There is much more information on the website
    Gaya Ethaniel ponders on Steffie's question...
    Steffie Denimore: oh I meant it rhetorically
    Steffie Denimore: as in that is a classic question
    Adams Rubble: ah, sorry
    Steffie Denimore: who am I?
    Steffie Denimore: :-)
    Gaya Ethaniel nods. An important question indeed
    Adams Rubble: We also are good at misunderstanding each other
    Adams Rubble: and then fixing it :)
    Steffie Denimore grins
    Gaya Ethaniel smiles
    Adams Rubble: That is the basic question Steffle
    Steffie Denimore: yes it is really
    Faenik is a hairy black ball with eyes and ears.
    Steffie Denimore: its not something you can just answer
    Steffie Denimore: like, "I'm a girl"
    Steffie Denimore: lol
    Adams Rubble: :)
    Steffie Denimore: or "I'm nice"
    Gaya Ethaniel smiles
    Adams Rubble: This method cuts through much to get to that basic question
    Adams Rubble: Hello Pia
    Gaya Ethaniel: _/!\_
    Steffie Denimore: hmmm
    Steffie Denimore: I don't see anyone
    Adams Rubble: One of our group just came online here because we have another meeting starting at 8
    Adams Rubble: Gaya and I need to go to that one
    Steffie Denimore: oh it isn't here?
    Faenik: why not?
    Steffie Denimore: ok, I'll shop then
    Steffie Denimore: lol
    Adams Rubble: :)
    Gaya Ethaniel: Hope to see you again Steffie. We meet here 4 times a day. Please refer to the website for the time table
    Adams Rubble: Please come again to another meeting
    Gaya Ethaniel: _/!\_
    Adams Rubble: It was nice meeting you :)
    Steffie Denimore: ok I will
    Steffie Denimore: I have the lm
    Adams Rubble: bye :)
    Steffie Denimore: thanks again, it was nice meeting you both
    Gaya Ethaniel: Have fun Steffie

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