2010.02.10 19:00 - Talking Stick

The Guardian for this meeting was stevenaia Michinaga. The comments are by stevenaia Michinaga.

stevenaia Michinaga: /hide

--BELL--

stevenaia Michinaga: hey there

Sylectra Darwin: hey :)

Sylectra Darwin: So you guys wear a host tag now?

stevenaia Michinaga: want to play...quaker

stevenaia Michinaga: nods

Sylectra Darwin: that's different.

Sylectra Darwin: sure

stevenaia Michinaga: it;s been a while

Sylectra Darwin: indeed

Sylectra Darwin: I can't believe I am still awake! hehe

stevenaia Michinaga: did you shovel today?

Sylectra Darwin: yes, we dug out the car twice.

stevenaia Michinaga: we only got 14" of snow

Sylectra Darwin: only?

Sylectra Darwin: God must hate you.

stevenaia Michinaga: other places got more

Sylectra Darwin: LOL

stevenaia Michinaga: I love snow

Sylectra Darwin: did you shovel?

stevenaia Michinaga: all the manly men with their snowblowers with lights, me with my shovel

Sylectra Darwin: I bet you showed em up!

stevenaia Michinaga: good excerise

stevenaia Michinaga: in short bursts

Sylectra Darwin: yes I think so. Jim did most of the shoveling but he did let me help toward the end. Then he tricked me and said it was all done, and when I put the shovel down he started again

stevenaia Michinaga: smart man

Sylectra Darwin: tricky.

stevenaia Michinaga: we made turkey sup today

Sylectra Darwin: No more fountain?

Sylectra Darwin: Yum

stevenaia Michinaga: figured few would be here so I turned it off

stevenaia Michinaga: put away the outer cushions

Sylectra Darwin: Is that pretty easy to do?

stevenaia Michinaga: nods

Sylectra Darwin: Wow, cool

stevenaia Michinaga: hehe

Sylectra Darwin: I like the flower thingy.

stevenaia Michinaga: I have one in my hair too, Fael made them

Sylectra Darwin: cams in for a look

Sylectra Darwin: aw, aren't you pretty?

Sylectra Darwin: A little pink flower on your head.

stevenaia Michinaga: well the big one would look silly on me

Sylectra Darwin: Might...

Sylectra Darwin: Might also weigh you down.

Sylectra Darwin: brb

stevenaia Michinaga: nods, ok

--BELL--

Sylectra Darwin: OK I am back

Sylectra Darwin: So what's new?

stevenaia Michinaga: I was doing a quick Chi Gung :)

stevenaia Michinaga: warming me up after coming in from shoveling before PaB

Sylectra Darwin: I was just reading about that...it's like tai chi right?

stevenaia Michinaga: my cat can sleep through anything, except when I go Tai Chi , then he needs to throw me off balance at my feet

Sylectra Darwin: does he also do that when you do Chi Gung?

stevenaia Michinaga: nods

Sylectra Darwin: aha

stevenaia Michinaga: I wnat to make a video of it

stevenaia Michinaga: just keeps wondering around my feet

Sylectra Darwin: your kitty is being decidely un-zen

Sylectra Darwin: So have you ever done group meditation (apart from PaB)?

stevenaia Michinaga: with yin there needs to be yang

stevenaia Michinaga: no

stevenaia Michinaga: is that what you do now on sundays with your group?

Sylectra Darwin: Yes, we sit in silence for an hour and listen for guidance, or messages, or that still small voice, or whatever you want to call it.

Sylectra Darwin: Sometimes someone feels led to speak out of the silence, and they are welcome to do so in the group.

stevenaia Michinaga: what does it bring out?

Sylectra Darwin: There is no leader and all are considered to have wisdom worth sharing.

Sylectra Darwin: Some pretty profound stuff.

stevenaia Michinaga: a respectful place to begin

stevenaia Michinaga: how many people participate?

Sylectra Darwin: Messages about the value of peace, the brighter side of bad circumstances, the challenge of staying serene.

Sylectra Darwin: Most speak with humility and don't assume the others will agree with them.

Sylectra Darwin: Usually about 30-40, sitting in a circle with an empty center.

stevenaia Michinaga: how much is words, how much is silence

Sylectra Darwin: It's a beautiful, simple room - round with vertical windows spaced evenly all around. You can see the woods and deer out there.

stevenaia Michinaga: hello Cal

Sylectra Darwin: We might only hear a few people say something in an hour - like maybe 3-4 sentences total in a whole hour.

Calvino Rabeni: Hi, Stevenaia and Sylectra

Sylectra Darwin: Hi Cal!

stevenaia Michinaga: wow

Sylectra Darwin: Whatcha got there, Cal?

Sylectra Darwin: Looks native american.

Calvino Rabeni: That's a "talking stick" for use when people do council in a big circle

stevenaia Michinaga: Have you met Sylectra, Cal?

Calvino Rabeni: Not formally :)

Sylectra Darwin: :) hello!

Calvino Rabeni: Hi Sylectra !

Sylectra Darwin: How are you doing?

stevenaia Michinaga: she was an early Guardian

stevenaia Michinaga: :)

Calvino Rabeni: Well as can be :)

Sylectra Darwin: yup, had a session per week for about a year.

stevenaia Michinaga: I;ve heard of talking sticks

Calvino Rabeni: I remember the name, maybe from the old logs

stevenaia Michinaga: probably seen them on TV

Sylectra Darwin: We passed a feather in the give-away circle that Mom and Dave hosted after their vision quests.

Sylectra Darwin: I love the ritual and how it affects conversation.

stevenaia Michinaga: your mother was native american, Sylectra?

Sylectra Darwin: she was a friend to many native americans, especially the Pima tribe in Southern Arizona.

--BELL--

Calvino Rabeni: I love the talking stick in groups too

Sylectra Darwin: She and Dave lent their abilities to help many end their drug or alcohol dependencies.

Sylectra Darwin: They asked the medicine man for help in putting together the vision quests so they could be respectful of their ways.

Sylectra Darwin: Pima, Navaho and Lakota Sioux medicine people visited their gatherings to supervise and help. They were always free to anyone who needed to attend. Many people used the events to begin the road back to health after quitting drugs or alcohol.

stevenaia Michinaga: :)

Sylectra Darwin: Steven's heard the story. :)

stevenaia Michinaga: I ahve?

stevenaia Michinaga: have

Sylectra Darwin: you don't remember?

stevenaia Michinaga: no

Calvino Rabeni: A good story I feel sure

Sylectra Darwin: smiles

Sylectra Darwin: still living it.

Sylectra Darwin: So are you native american, Cal?

Calvino Rabeni: I am not :)

Calvino Rabeni: But I do my best to understand respect

stevenaia Michinaga: can you tell me a bit about the talking stick's use, Cal?

Sylectra Darwin: It sounds as though you succeed.

Calvino Rabeni: Yes it is used in groups I go to , that are communities who know each other, and sometimes they meet and sit in circle for a certain type of discussion

Calvino Rabeni: The talking stick is a ritual object that empowers the person holding it to have the attention of the group, and the responsibility to use it well to speak the truth

Calvino Rabeni: there is no cross-talk and the quality of attention is good, for both the listeners and the speaker

Calvino Rabeni: when a speaker is done with their statement they can offer it to another or place it into the center of the circle

Calvino Rabeni: it might sit there for a while by itself

stevenaia Michinaga: so it is not a conversation

stevenaia Michinaga: but a moment for one to spak

Sylectra Darwin: wonderful

Calvino Rabeni: no, not like an informal conversation circle

Calvino Rabeni: Yes

Calvino Rabeni: it brings some focus and some sincerity to the speaking and makes it to be an offering, sometimes with a feeling of invoking other spirits for aid

Calvino Rabeni: the background of it I think you would say has some non-chiristian non-scientific basis

Calvino Rabeni: you were speaking of the vision quest earlier ?

Calvino Rabeni: the talking stick focuses the mind of the group into a unity

Calvino Rabeni: creating a kind of "we" space, but in the witness of higher powers

Calvino Rabeni: you have to be there and get used to it, for this to make sense, I suppose

Sylectra Darwin: yes I was

stevenaia Michinaga: yes, it sounds like a very interesting experience, athoratative on one hand but only momentarily

stevenaia Michinaga: hello Aaliyah

Aaliyah Zeritonga: hi there

--BELL--

stevenaia Michinaga: have you been here before?

Aaliyah Zeritonga: never

stevenaia Michinaga: please join us

Aaliyah Zeritonga: what exactly goes on here

Sylectra Darwin: brb

Aaliyah Zeritonga: i'm actually looking for a place on hinduism

stevenaia Michinaga: bye sylectra

stevenaia Michinaga: we are non-religious but welcome all views

stevenaia Michinaga: ops

stevenaia Michinaga: wb sylectra

Aaliyah Zeritonga: alright, actually i'm just curious if anyone knows about hinduism as i do not and i was jsut curious

Sylectra Darwin: ty

stevenaia Michinaga: oh, we record our chats and post them to the goup's wiki, it is ok if we include you?

Aaliyah Zeritonga: sure

stevenaia Michinaga: we have been doing this for almost 2 years

Sylectra Darwin: long time now!

stevenaia Michinaga: you can find more information here

stevenaia Michinaga: http://playasbeing.wik.is/

Calvino Rabeni: :)

stevenaia Michinaga: in fact one of our group Joined us from her travels in India the other night

Sylectra Darwin loves india

stevenaia Michinaga: there are a number of buddist in the group, but I don;t know much about that either, learned more about it here than anywhere else

stevenaia Michinaga: bye Aaliyah

Sylectra Darwin: I've met some buddhists in quaker meetings

Calvino Rabeni: Do you live in an area with a quaker community then?

Sylectra Darwin: There are quaker communities everywhere, it seems :)

Sylectra Darwin: I live in NJ, and yes, there are many such meetings up here.

Sylectra Darwin: Pennsylvania appears to have many. This is all new to me as I have only started hanging out with the Quakers a couple months.

Sylectra Darwin: I was once Methodist but have sort of visited any church that interests me since then.

stevenaia Michinaga: yes, there are many quaker schools and "meeting houses" here

Calvino Rabeni: I've known them a long time, but am not one of them

Sylectra Darwin: My stepmom was one for 15 years or so and she quietly recommended that I check them out, when I complained of the shallowness and huge budgets of many churches.

Sylectra Darwin: of course I ignored her for another 10 years.

Sylectra Darwin: LOL

stevenaia Michinaga: I think my most interesting experiendce was watching my son at jewish day school play against the quakers, it just seems unusually noncompetitive

--BELL--

stevenaia Michinaga: hello Lucinda

stevenaia Michinaga: have you been here before

Calvino Rabeni: Lucinda is my guest :)

stevenaia Michinaga: welcome

Lucinda Lavender: thank you for letting me visit.

stevenaia Michinaga: is she aware we record our conversatiosn, CAl

Sylectra Darwin: Hi Lucinda :)

Lucinda Lavender: Hi

Calvino Rabeni: I think - you know the chat is recorded, lucinda?

stevenaia Michinaga: is it ok to include you in our logs?

Lucinda Lavender: yes

stevenaia Michinaga: thank you

Lucinda Lavender: you are welcom

Calvino Rabeni: We were talking about quakers, talking stick, groups that meet in circles

Lucinda Lavender: oh! this is a famiar topic for me I am happy to listen.

stevenaia Michinaga: our conversations move from topic to topic as anyone chooses, Sylectra was saying it reminded her of her recent experiences with Quaker meetings

Sylectra Darwin: The circle is such a nice theme, isn't it?

stevenaia Michinaga: the "talking stick" is another approach to groups

stevenaia Michinaga: I love the approach of talking only when you have something to say

Calvino Rabeni: It is one of those things that very slowly grows "on" one, not through the analytic mind

Lucinda Lavender: I am in a dream circle where we use a stone.We listen to dreams.

Sylectra Darwin: Very nice!

Calvino Rabeni: these things have a life of their own

Sylectra Darwin: Are there rules about how to respond when someone shares a dream?

Calvino Rabeni: I heard a little of it - quite intriguing

Lucinda Lavender: yes, wenever talk across the circle and try not to talk to each other...we try to listen as deeply as we can to the wisdom of the dream

Calvino Rabeni: wonderful

stevenaia Michinaga: one in our group hosts a Dream Workshop on a regular basis

Lucinda Lavender: Nice..

Lucinda Lavender: Is the focus psychlogical?

Calvino Rabeni: The dream itself is like a Being to be regarded as intelligent

stevenaia Michinaga: the leader is a physician and a psychoanalyst

stevenaia Michinaga: here is a link about it http://www.kira.org/index.php?option...106&Itemid=136

Calvino Rabeni: Oh, I meant, your type of group, Lucinda

Calvino Rabeni: The workshop here is a mix of different things, I think you'd say

Lucinda Lavender: Ah. right Calvino...it is connected to the universe through some form of intellience I think

--BELL--

Calvino Rabeni: Yes. Creating a kind of altered space is important for this

Sylectra Darwin: I am really digging the group dynamic when everyone follows an agreed-upon format for a more positive outcome.

Calvino Rabeni: :)

stevenaia Michinaga: a framework is a nice guide, I was thinking of what a rose arbor does for the rose

Sylectra Darwin: Steven's working up a sweat over there, typing.

stevenaia Michinaga: :)

Sylectra Darwin: lovely

Sylectra Darwin: Do we have some kind of translator running?

stevenaia Michinaga: no, why?

Sylectra Darwin: I am occasionally seeing stuff added to the chat lines.

Sylectra Darwin: Like your smiley - an empty parens got added to it.

stevenaia Michinaga: perhaps you forgot how badly I type?

Sylectra Darwin: I would think that except Cal also had that on his smiley.

Calvino Rabeni: one colon one paren :)

stevenaia Michinaga: I need to leave, nice meeting you Lucinda, please come again

stevenaia Michinaga: good to see you here agoin Sylectra

stevenaia Michinaga: and always nice to see you Calvino

Calvino Rabeni: Likewise steve, take care :)

Lucinda Lavender: nice to meet you all...I love how this works...

stevenaia Michinaga: feel free to enjoy yourselves

Calvino Rabeni: He flies out through the roof in a stylish way

Lucinda Lavender: gee, is it very challenging?