2008.10.02 07:00 - Comparing Notes

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    Enjoy - CH


    Hi and messing with the autorecord ...

    Caledonia Heron: jkj'
    Fael Illyar: Hi Cal :)
    Caledonia Heron: hey there :)
    Fael Illyar: jkj?
    Caledonia Heron: testing to see the time stamp is off :)
    Fael Illyar: Oh, ok
    PaB Listener Master: I've been touched by a PaB guardian.
    PaB Listener Master: Recording has started!
    PaB Listener Master: I've been touched by a PaB guardian.
    PaB Listener Master: Recording has stopped, the session is ended.
    PaB Listener Master: Recording has started!
    Fael Illyar ponders ... it's not working
    Caledonia Heron: ah, the little recorder is running :)
    PaB Listener Master: I've been touched by a PaB guardian.
    PaB Listener Master: Recording has stopped, the session is ended.
    PaB Listener Master: I've been touched by a PaB guardian.
    PaB Listener Master: Recording has started!
    Caledonia Heron: oh, ok saw the system message
    Fael Illyar: if it worked, we'd have small blue balls above our heads
    Caledonia Heron: oh really
    Caledonia Heron: still working out the kinks?
    Fael Illyar: apparently, yes :)
    Caledonia Heron: :)
    PaB Listener Master: I've been touched by a PaB guardian.
    PaB Listener Master: Recording has stopped, the session is ended.
    PaB Listener Master: Recording has started!
    Fael Illyar: nope, didn't help wearing my tag either.
    Caledonia Heron: it seems to recognize guardians tag or no?
    Fael Illyar: it's got a list of names too.
    Caledonia Heron: so it knows who to expect
    Caledonia Heron: hey Umbriel :)
    Fael Illyar: Hi Umb :)
    Umbriel Levenque: Peace and Love


      We start out thinking we're on a plateau but maybe there's a little more than that going on ...

    Fael Illyar doesn't have too many topics to bring up lately somehow ...
    Caledonia Heron: I know what you mean Fael ...
    Umbriel Levenque: How is your 'practice' going both of you? I'm on a plateau of some sort atm
    Caledonia Heron: lol, maybe that is the topic
    Umbriel Levenque: :-)
    Fael Illyar: kind of feels like a plateau at the moment but ... somehow also feels like it isn't :)
    Faenik: why not?
    Umbriel Levenque has been taking in the view around on the plateau
    Caledonia Heron: agree with you both ....
    Caledonia Heron: I don't know if this is true for either of you - the pab is flavouring my worldview and the way I conduct myself, how I be, interact with others .... suppose this is a natural outgrowth after having it be so near to constant thought
    Fael Illyar: flavouring in what way?
    Umbriel Levenque: 'constant thought'?
    Fael Illyar: to me, it's not so much PaB anymore. It's more of learning things about myself.
    Fael Illyar: and helping other to learn things about themselves when I can.
    Caledonia Heron: flavouring = more delicious word for influencing :)
    Caledonia Heron: constant thought = it's on my mind multiple times a day
    Fael Illyar: in this case 'it' would mean?
    Umbriel Levenque: of course, PaB has had a large impact Cal as with my other practices
    Fael Illyar: PaB as doesn't really work as 'it' in my mind :)
    Caledonia Heron: gosh, feel like I'm being interrogated :)
    Fael Illyar: just trying to understand :)
    Caledonia Heron: I know, I was kidding
    Faenik loves wells!
    Umbriel Levenque: :-)
    Fael Illyar: but it's an interesting question. What's this 'it' that's in your mind several times a day?
    Umbriel Levenque: would be interested to know how PaB has changed your worldview...
    Umbriel Levenque: actual exercises/bells = 'it'?
    Caledonia Heron: I could characterize "it" as an activity or process that incorporates the 9sec or variations thereof into my daily activities
    Fael Illyar: Ah, so just doing the pauses? Perhaps also how you do them?
    Caledonia Heron: yes, and how that influences my interactions, worldview, activities
    Caledonia Heron: it informs those things in what I consider a beneficial way
    Umbriel Levenque: ah... care to give us some details?
    Fael Illyar: less of a tunnel vision?
    Umbriel Levenque: <-- worry less these days
    Caledonia Heron: for me not so much about tunnel vision but can see that viewpoint
    Fael Illyar: <-- less afraid these days
    Fael Illyar didn't even know about being afraid before though.
    Caledonia Heron: that seems a positive response Fael
    Umbriel Levenque: yes
    Faenik is a hairy black ball with eyes and ears.
    Caledonia Heron: I thought your comment about helping others interesting Umbriel
    Umbriel Levenque: um... that was Fael's IIRC...
    Caledonia Heron: oh no, that was Fael wasn't it
    Caledonia Heron: sorry
    Fael Illyar: It's always easier for others to see certain things about you that are very much on the surface but somehow still under your own radar.
    Caledonia Heron: I can see that - kind of tricky territory there
    Caledonia Heron: to be truly helpful, perhaps by being yourself and not righteous or manipulative
    Fael Illyar: certainly :)


      Adams arrives ...

    Fael Illyar: Hi Adams :)
    Umbriel Levenque: being yourself... that takes some work imo
    Umbriel Levenque: Peace and Love
    Fael Illyar: yes, it's difficult sometimes :)
    Umbriel Levenque: not to be afraid to be open
    Umbriel Levenque: unafraid to 'be judged' by others
    Adams Dubrovna: hello Fael, Umriel and Cal :)
    Adams Dubrovna: Umbriel
    Caledonia Heron: hey Adams :)
    Umbriel Levenque: :-)
    Adams Dubrovna: Just an aside to Cal. I crashed yesterday and couldn't get back in time
    Caledonia Heron: lol, ok thanks :) it was a hasty retreat :)
    Caledonia Heron: sometimes it feels like forever to relog
    Faenik: why not?
    Adams Dubrovna: Yup. Didn't want you to think I was being rude :)
    Umbriel Levenque: don't think 'being yourself' and 'being righteous or manipulative' are related... some are just that and pretend to be otherwise... that is not being themselves imo
    Caledonia Heron: oh gosh, I was so peeved ... like, was it something I said? the nerve!! .... ha! it was fine, and I thank you for the explanation, I did wonder :)
    Faenik: indeed?
    Adams Dubrovna: Yes Umbriel
    Caledonia Heron: well if you are being those things Umbriel (righteous or manipulative) that is kind of a form of yourself as you are you by definition, but it is not likely your genuine or authentic self
    Faenik is a hairy black ball with eyes and ears.
    Adams Dubrovna: ty Umbriel
    Umbriel Levenque: np


      Are we all saying the same thing over and over in different ways? ...

    Umbriel Levenque: for most of us, being 'genuine or authentic self' doesn't come naturally Cal. Hence my comments that it takes some efforts/work
    Umbriel Levenque: the journey to discover 'genuine or authentic self' may never end for some of us
    Caledonia Heron: that's interesting Umbriel
    Umbriel Levenque: so asking ppl to be 'true to themselves' is not always possible if you referring being 'true to themselves' to being 'genuine or authentic self'. Also such self always evolves... what do you mean by genuine or authentic self Cal? Do you mean being in touch with Being?
    Adams Dubrovna thinks wow
    Faenik is a hairy black ball with eyes and ears.
    Caledonia Heron: that question could elicit a fairly complex response and it will boil down in texting to a reader's digest kind of thing but I will try to answer it
    Umbriel Levenque: :-) ty
    Caledonia Heron: so...
    Faenik: ah :)
    Caledonia Heron: yes, agreed self always evolves
    Caledonia Heron: and yes, whether you acknowledge it or not, whether you "see" or "glimpse" it or not, we are in touch with being
    Caledonia Heron: when I speak of being genuine or authentic I can ask a question to help define it
    Caledonia Heron: do you know that self you are when you have nothing going on but your essence, that you're not angry or angling for something or reacting?
    Caledonia Heron: that place you come from when you being openly honest in your dealings with other people, not just business or cordial, but being honest about reflecting who you are
    Adams Dubrovna: The I Am or Z-self :)
    Caledonia Heron: that is a form of authenticity, of being genuine
    Caledonia Heron: and that, in and of itself allows other people to show up
    Umbriel Levenque: so true to be oneself... if one is open and authentic at each moment, how one is, whether one is being 'righteous' or 'humble', whatever positive or negative characteristics there may be... is that what you mean by being true to oneself Cal?
    Caledonia Heron: and to me, that's how you help people, not by giving instructions or little "lessons", by showing up yourself
    Faenik is a hairy black ball with eyes and ears.
    Adams Dubrovna finds it interesting that we can think so much alike and use such different ways of saying it
    Umbriel Levenque: yes
    Adams Dubrovna: use
    Caledonia Heron: yes Adams, I think we are dancing in the same venue here :)
    Umbriel Levenque: :-)
    Caledonia Heron: different points of view, different ways to say it


      Is it a journey or do you know all you need to right now? ...

    Umbriel Levenque: I suppose that's why 'finding yourself' is important for you Fael
    Caledonia Heron: I think being true to oneself is a little bit different
    Fael Illyar: Of course, finding myself allows me to be myself better :)
    Adams Dubrovna: We have to keep watching our self
    Umbriel Levenque: and not being afraid also
    Umbriel Levenque: not being afraid to see yourself for what it is*
    Adams Dubrovna: yes Umbriel
    Caledonia Heron: I don't really get the quest/journey thing of "finding yourself"
    Faenik: why not?
    Umbriel Levenque: it's a hard work I tell you Adams!
    Adams Dubrovna: It doesn't have to be a journey. We just keep doing it :)
    Umbriel Levenque: many selves/characteristics to discover and many old habits to look into and all these changing at the same time... Cal
    Umbriel Levenque: yes Adams
    Caledonia Heron: I suppose Umbriel
    Adams Dubrovna: subtracting layers
    Fael Illyar: it's all there, all you need to do is look ... although, that's not necessarily easy :)
    Caledonia Heron: your history is just that .... history
    Caledonia Heron: you are not your history
    Caledonia Heron: you are who you are right now
    Caledonia Heron: imo, of course :)
    Umbriel Levenque: I find it baffling... to think about what I am... 'I' is a collection of 'stuff'
    Umbriel Levenque: 'I' mostly concerns me when I interact with others
    Caledonia Heron: it's pretty straightforward I think, you be ... and then there's all the day to day "doing"
    Adams Dubrovna: Some people might say throw all the stuff and that is what you are:)
    Umbriel Levenque: :-)
    Umbriel Levenque: what 'you' are... yes Adams
    Fael Illyar: throw? as in lose it?
    Caledonia Heron: even my blankee? :)
    Adams Dubrovna: :)
    Umbriel Levenque: :-)
    Adams Dubrovna: I think you can keep the blankee :)
    Caledonia Heron: [relearning baby talk with visiting baby :)]
    Caledonia Heron: ah, thank goodness :)
    Adams Dubrovna: :)
    Faenik: indeed?


      Those unbounded times ...

    Adams Dubrovna: I had an interesting few seconds last night and I am dying to tell you but haven't wanted to interrupt the flow
    Umbriel Levenque: please do Adams
    Caledonia Heron: let's hear it :)
    Adams Dubrovna: Last night I spent the first half of the night with my mind in great activity (I was running around doing all kinds of stuff)
    Adams Dubrovna: The second half my mind was completely at rest
    Adams Dubrovna: Inthe space in between...
    Adams Dubrovna: I suddenly felt that the space opened up and it was beautiful
    Adams Dubrovna: it just lasted a few seconds but I realized that I feel space as compartmentalized
    Adams Dubrovna: It is like living in a big box. there are boundaries
    Umbriel Levenque mutters... wow
    Umbriel Levenque: sounds like you were aware of those seconds at the time... how did it feel afterwards when you looked back?
    Caledonia Heron: interesting .... I like that "place"
    Adams Dubrovna: Umbriel, now I wonder what I do about the compartments I am living in :)
    Umbriel Levenque: :-) live I suggest
    Adams Dubrovna: Now that I have experienced this I want to experience it again. I think I felt free
    Umbriel Levenque: um... ok
    Umbriel Levenque is somewhat reminded of Rubble's attachment of experience of Being
    Faenik: indeed?
    Umbriel Levenque: be in the present Adams if you can, even if it's in the 'compartments'
    Caledonia Heron: yes, the "place" I am inferring from your comment "it was beautiful" is, for me not "free" but obliviously nothing which is incredibly liberating
    Fael Illyar: that want itself is a compartment.
    Fael Illyar: that will prevent you from getting there.
    Umbriel Levenque: must be such gaps everywhere Adams. in the compartments as well if one can just see them
    Adams Dubrovna: Yes,, thank you Fael, I noticed the "want" :)
    Adams Dubrovna: Yes, the compartments can be all kinds of things
    Umbriel Levenque: yes... indeed Adams
    Caledonia Heron: I think you guys are more synched up in your view s on this ... I still have not encountered anyone who gets what I'm talking about on this "nothingness"
    Adams Dubrovna: They might even be attachments but I think there is something more :)
    Adams Dubrovna: I have been through periods where I feel nothing when I meditate Cal but it has been just that, nothing
    Umbriel Levenque: yes Cal... only a few ppl in RL I know understand 'nothingness' in my experience
    Caledonia Heron: I don't think that is the same nothing, if you can believe it
    Adams Dubrovna: yes, I believe :)
    Umbriel Levenque: yes... it's not nothing no
    Caledonia Heron: lol, yes Umbriel, the nothing is a something I think
    Umbriel Levenque: :D
    Fael Illyar: the 'nothingness' in which everything is?
    Caledonia Heron: yes Fael, nothing on a cosmic scale
    Umbriel Levenque: a friend described this as everything dissolved... no boundaries... hard to put into words
    Adams Dubrovna: Like my space?
    Caledonia Heron: yeah, nouns fall short, adjectives do better
    Umbriel Levenque: possibly yes Adams
    Umbriel Levenque: (again hard to compare each of us' experience as words fail)
    Adams Dubrovna: What adjectives Cal ?
    Caledonia Heron: oh totally, are you on myspace? ha ha
    Umbriel Levenque: :-)
    Adams Dubrovna: Yes, I don't have the words
    Caledonia Heron: big, open, free, like that ....
    Faenik: なるほど^^
    Adams Dubrovna smiles broadly
    Umbriel Levenque: dense also somehow...
    Caledonia Heron: molecular and whole at the same time
    Adams Dubrovna thinks maybe he'll understand Cal's "nothingness" yet
    Umbriel Levenque: well put Cal... rings true somehow
    Caledonia Heron: lol, maybe ...... maybe I'll get your point of view too... I guess that's why we come, to compare notes
    Adams Dubrovna: :)
    Umbriel Levenque: :-)
    Adams Dubrovna: Unfortunately I am being called away. Bye for now :)
    Fael Illyar: See you later Adams :)
    Caledonia Heron: ok, see you soon :)
    Umbriel Levenque: Peace and Love
    Umbriel Levenque: Good day Adams. See you soon again
    Adams Dubrovna: namaste
    Caledonia Heron: I will move along also ... nice to see you all ... an interesting discussion :)
    Fael Illyar: See you later Cal :)
    Umbriel Levenque: Good day to you too Cal.
    Umbriel Levenque: Peace and Love
    Caledonia Heron: bye :)
    Caledonia Heron: lol, no tp :(
    Umbriel Levenque: :-(
    Fael Illyar: ah, SL acting up again.
    Faenik: indeed?
    Teleport completed

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