2009.05.11 07:00 - Stronger

yum, KalCal

hello there ...

Fael Illyar: Hi Kallie :)
Kallie Kira: hi there :)
Fael Illyar: Hi Pema :)
Pema Pera: Hi Kallie and Fael!
Kallie Kira: hello there Pema :) nice surprise ... up late?
Pema Pera: Kallie is such a cool name!
Pema Pera: yeah, up late
Pema Pera: won't stay long
Kallie Kira: ty :)
Pema Pera: 11 pm
Kallie Kira: yay, I did the conversion correctly!
Fael Illyar smiles.
Pema Pera: just came back from a mixed event: good Italian food, good beer, and good conversations about N-body algorithms . . .
Kallie Kira: ahh, with Arturo?
Pema Pera: Kallie must be a spy . . . .
Kallie Kira: a spy who read n-body sims notices, makes good guesses :)
Fael Illyar smiles 'Sounds like a spy, yes.'
Kallie Kira: *reads
Pema Pera: :)
Pema Pera: should be a fun demo, Thursday
Kallie Kira: yes, looking forward to it

eat when you're hungry ...

Fael Illyar started eating dinner, noticed the time and felt like logging in :)
Pema Pera: we started with 1,000 particles but decided that 8 was much more interesting, when following the individual trajectories
Kallie Kira: yeah, 1K a little hard to track
Pema Pera: ah, early dinner for you?
Kallie Kira: dinner is lunch is some parts :)
Fael Illyar: 5pm ... is that early? :)
Kallie Kira: *in
Pema Pera: in most parts of the world, yes
Kallie Kira: for me that would be early
Fael Illyar: well, dinner is the closest to this time :)
Fael Illyar eats when she feels like cooking.
Kallie Kira: shuttle launch in 4 hours :)
Pema Pera: in most countries it ranges from 6 till midnight
Kallie Kira: yes, we average at about 8pm
Fael Illyar: oh... I'd call that time nightsnack already :)
Fael Illyar: Well, let's just say I'm having a meal :)
Kallie Kira: lol, ok
Kallie Kira: have you been paying your taxes? pab I mean :)
Pema Pera: it's funny, there is the expression brunch, for between breakfast and lunch, but not for something between lunch and dinner, like 5 pm . . . .
Kallie Kira: it's called tea time ... for Brits :)
Kallie Kira: about 4pm
Pema Pera: yeah, well
Fael Illyar: perhaps less lately on the bells but ... I do spend a lot of time "doing nothing" :)
Pema Pera: if I would have to eat British food, I'd have a big snack a couple hours before too :-)
Kallie Kira: LOL ... if you like the weather, you'll love the cooking
Kallie Kira: that was our joke when we lived there
Fael Illyar is used to eating when hungry :)
Kallie Kira: also ... 2 queues, no waiting

doing nothing ...

Pema Pera: doing nothing is interesting -- there are so many ways to do that, I find, I'm discovering more and more at least :)
Fael Illyar: yes, every time is different :)
Kallie Kira: doing nothing is very important imo
Pema Pera: like in wu-wei, not-doing, which has many many levels/ways/varieties/subtleties
Pema Pera: consciously trying to not-do allows you to see how much you are doing habitually already . . . . in so many ways
Kallie Kira: yes, many ways to do nothing :) a mastery of art
Kallie Kira: ah, viewing habits
Kallie Kira: (picturing nuns)
Kallie Kira: (doing nothing)
Fael Illyar: It's somehow semi-automatic for me now ... I sometimes just lay down on the sofa or bed and ... well, be with whatever I see floating around in my mind.
Kallie Kira: hi mana :)
Pema Pera: Hi Manantiala
manantiala Ella: hi,kallie
Fael Illyar: Hello manantiala :)
manantiala Ella: hello all
Kallie Kira: maybe new av :)
Kallie Kira: habits can be useful, good habits
Fael Illyar: sometimes I notice an urge to get up and do something else but still don't find myself getting up, even though I'm not aware of resisting the urge.
Kallie Kira: it takes 21 days to make or break a habit I was told
Pema Pera: well, inspired by this conversation, I now really feel like doing nothing, to the point of going to sleep.
Kallie Kira: lol, that is something
Pema Pera: good seeing you both!
Fael Illyar: Good night Pema :)
Kallie Kira: good night :)
Fael Illyar: That really was quite a short visit :)
Kallie Kira: yes, a pop-in

back to nothing ...

Kallie Kira: noticing your urge and choosing to act, is that new for you?
Fael Illyar: not really new but ... something I've been noticing lately.
Fael Illyar: I sometimes feel like getting up and doing something but then end up not lifting a finger. All the while not noticing myself resisting the urge at all.
Fael Illyar: Hi Eliza :)
Eliza Madrigal: Hi there. :) Who drove up today??
Kallie Kira: hi Eliza :)
Eliza Madrigal: Magnificent wings, Fael :)
Kallie Kira: looks like rotten auster owns it
Fael Illyar smiles 'Thank you.'
Eliza Madrigal: Hm
Kallie Kira: I can drop by later and remove it
Kallie Kira: yes your wings look really nice Fael
Eliza Madrigal: No worries...just curious. Sometimes things just appear here. :)
Fael Illyar: there also seems to be a for sale hoverdisk there.
Kallie Kira: yes - this av has no superpowers ... so will have to clean later
Fael Illyar has been seeing a few of those lately. Vehicles just left around and for sale.
Fael Illyar: there's a military helicopter set to bombarding the ground left on a plot that's next to my land in one sim.
Fael Illyar: makes quite a noise and is for sale at 1000L
Kallie Kira: ack
Eliza Madrigal has no use at all for a military helicopter. :P
Fael Illyar: Well, luckily my friend told me how to prevent neighbor's sounds from being heard on my plot.
Kallie Kira: have you any pab news today Eliza?
Eliza Madrigal: that's useful Fael.

the shift to pab ...

Eliza Madrigal: PaB news?
Kallie Kira: anything to report, any insights of late? :)
Fael Illyar has only the text she emailed to the google group.
Eliza Madrigal: Ah, not here. I did read the page you forwarded, Fael .
Eliza Madrigal: (looked like I was going to say more, didn't it>! hehe)
Eliza Madrigal: I've been working on resumes this morning... trying to walk my learning out...
Eliza Madrigal: not be 'affected' by the stress... breathe :)
Fael Illyar smiles.
Eliza Madrigal: Enlightenment might help!
Eliza Madrigal: haha
Fael Illyar: The site the text is on has some interesting texts. Also for dealing with stress I think.
Eliza Madrigal: yes it seems to be a nice site
Kallie Kira: I will look it over
Fael Illyar: I found the audio pieces most useful somehow.
Fael Illyar: the "Free Audio" link on the top of the page.
Kallie Kira: good, ! I will use it

paying attention ...

Eliza Madrigal: My life is changing in dramatic ways, and it is helpful to keep Trust in mind... that in paying attention to being mindful, the next things have always opened up. Why should they stop now ? :)
Fael Illyar: Yep :)
Fael Illyar: always something new around the corner :)
Fael Illyar: (once you notice there is no corner)
Eliza Madrigal: :)
Kallie Kira: you mean life events in motion like job family etc or personal awareness events, or both?
Eliza Madrigal: All of the above!
Kallie Kira: wow, busy girl :)
Eliza Madrigal: My 'pattern' seems to be an "all at once" kind of pattern....
Eliza Madrigal: sometimes that is exciting... and sometimes I would like it not to be quite so much so :)
Fael Illyar: it's easy to overload yourself.
Eliza Madrigal: Fael, I also think it ties into what you've mentioned a few times... procrastination... but not exactly. I've put things off... or rather expected them to unwind more s'moothly'
Eliza Madrigal: I feel that practice is enabling me to be 'stronger'
Kallie Kira: stronger means more able to deal?
Eliza Madrigal: yes
Eliza Madrigal: to face whatever is around that non-corner. hahah
Fael Illyar notes with interest that she's equating that "stronger" with seeing things more as they are.
Eliza Madrigal: yes, certainly that is it in my case :)
Kallie Kira: that's a good thing :)
Eliza Madrigal: It can be a little hard to see how much you haven't dealt with over time...
Eliza Madrigal: but that shouldn't matter, ultimately. Change can be instantaneous
Fael Illyar: Yes, it can, however instantaneous change seems less likely to stick.
Kallie Kira: yes, when you get it, that is an instance, an instant
Fael Illyar: but it does give you an idea of what is possible :)
Eliza Madrigal: What I've done to now, I've done with my whole heart...
Eliza Madrigal: and that has to count for something.. even in an unexpected way...
Eliza Madrigal: Or at least that is what I would tell someone else if they asked . :D
Kallie Kira: acting in 100% mode is a true thing
Fael Illyar: of course it counts for something :) Just difficult to tell in advance what.
Eliza Madrigal nods
Kallie Kira: and I think as regards whether things that happen in an instant stick, it depends on the instance, what occured
Fael Illyar: yes, a change that has been brewing for months but happens in an instant can very well stick.
Kallie Kira: I have had the experience that those moments, unexpected usually, have stayed with me and have profoundly altered my perspective
Eliza Madrigal: yes Kallie?
Fael Illyar: yes, me too.

what you know ...

Eliza Madrigal: What seems funny, is that I *know* everything is fine... moving along... flowing in the way it supposed to. My life has been nothing but 'miraculous' to now. Yet! Sometimes I forget completely!
Fael Illyar: yes, it's very easy to focus on one single thing and judge your whole life based on that.
Kallie Kira: yes we all forget, some more or less than others ... we can remember when we see being, when we stop for a moment
Eliza Madrigal: Yes :)
Eliza Madrigal: I need to stop with the paperwork... let Being deal with it ;-)
Kallie Kira: maybe remember is not the right word, we can renew our experience of that
Fael Illyar: Heh, if you le Being deal with it through you, it might even work :)
Kallie Kira: lol, yes, stop with the paperwork already, I like that :)
Eliza Madrigal: hahahha
Fael Illyar: but pauses are necessary with some things :)
Kallie Kira: now you've moved Fael it looks like your wings are enveloping us :)
Fael Illyar smiles.
Eliza Madrigal feels sheltered
Kallie Kira: :)
Eliza Madrigal: When I think of remembering, I think of things like PaB... It feels as though all the things I've been interested in and pursuing rather naturally... and yet feeling a gap with communicating... came together in a very natural way that made sense of it all very quickly
Kallie Kira: nice :)
Fael Illyar smiles.
Eliza Madrigal: I can see that as a hopeful example that there is a sort of hidden flow beneath the surface
Fael Illyar: Yes, what we can understand with reasoning only scratches the surface of what is.
Eliza Madrigal: yes, I prob. shouldnt say 'sense of it IT ALL"... but I think you know what i mean. heh
Eliza Madrigal: Fael, exactly
Kallie Kira: that's an interesting idea "below the surface" ... the surface or veil or partition being all the things we see and the stories we make which are not real in a sense
Eliza Madrigal: Yes Kallie. that's what I'm relying on... living in a way that pays attention to/trusts the understructure
Eliza Madrigal: walking in the light as it comes, so to speak
Kallie Kira: paying attention or noticing that flow ... I think how that translates to the larger, the largest scale of humanity and what that would look like in terms of what might happen, how that would manifest .... that could kick some butt :)
Eliza Madrigal: haha!! yes!!!
Kallie Kira: if 50%+ people noticed that flow at some time, or multiple times per day, what would that result be?
Eliza Madrigal: Certainly multiplied peace
Kallie Kira: can I get a "oh yeah"? :)
Eliza Madrigal: Amen
Kallie Kira: lol

when to trust ...

Fael Illyar: The most difficult part people have with trusting the flow is when they, themselves prevent the flow from helping them and take that for proof of the flow not being trustworthy.
Kallie Kira: yes, I see the that logic and, reject it .... we can say that the "flow" has no utility, no knowledge of trust,
Kallie Kira: or not :)
Eliza Madrigal nods... that is quite a thought Fael. We try to 'help it along' too much sometimes... get impatient.
Fael Illyar: I have been there myself too :)
Eliza Madrigal: And yet what else have we experienced?
Kallie Kira: and we will again most likely :)
Fael Illyar: luckily not for long periods recently.
Eliza Madrigal: If we cannot trust that what can we trust? Ourselves?? haha
Fael Illyar: in a way, I'd say that trust is an illusion.
Eliza Madrigal: yes?
Fael Illyar: but ... hmmh... how to explain what I mean :)
Fael Illyar: or perhaps better to say that conditional trust is an illusion.
Eliza Madrigal: Ah, yes. That makes sense.
Kallie Kira: trust is a tool :)
Eliza Madrigal: Thank you both for letting me bring this up here. Yesterday in one session we talked about not answering truthfully to "how are you" or "what's up" sometimes...
Eliza Madrigal: I felt a little as though I keep things in the abstract too often and don't 'share'
Eliza Madrigal: :)
Fael Illyar: nothing there to force yourself to share :)
Fael Illyar: that too is a choice :)
Kallie Kira: some people live at that level
Kallie Kira: some don't
Eliza Madrigal: No...but when I felt so odd dealing with the paperwork and such... thought it is a very
Eliza Madrigal: good 'practical' example
Eliza Madrigal: of the sorts of things we deal with.... living in another Way beyond 'ordinary levels'...
Eliza Madrigal: Factoring in that Timeless/Trust/Being/Flow element
Eliza Madrigal: (Plus, the support is just very nice and I deeply appreciate it)
Kallie Kira: lol, that stuff happens anyway, all the time
Eliza Madrigal nods
Kallie Kira: :)
Kallie Kira: gotta giddy up now :)
Eliza Madrigal: Bye Kallie :)