2011.07.14 13:00 - Shy and Quiet Holding Hands

The Guardian for this meeting was Eliza, filling in for Lia. The comments are by Eliza, joined by Arisia, FcSeeker, Mila, Cosmicflower, Arch, Wol, Dash, Korel, & Zon. Ari and I chatted for a bit, then everything went red, and we both had t re-log... 

Arisia Vita: wb
Eliza Madrigal: Take 2!
Arisia Vita: :)
Arisia Vita: strange
Arisia Vita: we are on grass now?
Eliza Madrigal: yes a new feature Storm gave us
Arisia Vita: ah, nice
Arisia Vita: not so....cold
Eliza Madrigal: I like it... makes me want to plant things
Arisia Vita: yes
Eliza Madrigal: :)) yes sometimes so many seats (though wonderful to allow for as many as wish to attend)
Eliza Madrigal: can feel hm...
Eliza Madrigal: maybe not cold but something :)
Eliza Madrigal: hehe.... wonder what Storm will think of the clothesline
Arisia Vita: he'll hang his undies on it to dry... :)
Eliza Madrigal: :)) so many strange things in my inventory

Eliza Madrigal: Hi FcSeeker! It has been a few days....
Eliza Madrigal: how is *everything* ?
FcSeeker Resident: Hello Eliza and Arisia
Arisia Vita: welcome Fc
Eliza Madrigal: Hi Cosmicflower!
Cosmicflower Ushimawa: Hi Dears ;)
Eliza Madrigal: It has been too long since I've seen you
Arisia Vita: welcome Cos!
Eliza Madrigal: How are you and baby?
Cosmicflower Ushimawa: smiling ;)
Cosmicflower Ushimawa: ah, Simo is running
Eliza Madrigal: wow, nice
Cosmicflower Ushimawa: and is becoming a little boy
Cosmicflower Ushimawa: ;)
Cosmicflower Ushimawa: and.. I am married
Eliza Madrigal smiles
FcSeeker Resident: <3<3<3
Cosmicflower Ushimawa: went married at 13th May
Eliza Madrigal: Congratulations!
Cosmicflower Ushimawa: Thanks Dear

--BELL--

Arisia Vita: welcome Arch
Eliza Madrigal: :) Thanks for sharing the pause
Eliza Madrigal: Hi Arch :)
Cosmicflower Ushimawa: Hi Arch ;)
Archmage Atlantis: Cos!!!! l;tns
FcSeeker Resident: Hello Archmage
Arisia Vita: welcome dash
Eliza Madrigal: Hi Dash :)
Archmage Atlantis: Elizs. FC. Dash//////Howdy
Dash Earthboy: hey y'all
FcSeeker Resident: Hello Dash
FcSeeker Resident: Hello Wol
Arisia Vita: welcome Wol
Dash Earthboy: hey Wol
Wol Euler: hello everyone, sorry I'm late
Archmage Atlantis: Namaste Wol
Eliza Madrigal: And Hi Wol! :)
Eliza Madrigal: Not at all Wol, we haven't settled on a topic yet
Wol Euler smiles.
Eliza Madrigal: Ideas? Considerations?
Archmage Atlantis: The Seti and the search?
Archmage Atlantis: Quantum Physics?
Eliza Madrigal: well I'm not a quantum physician but will try... heh
Archmage Atlantis: The problem I'm having withmy headphones
Archmage Atlantis: The lack of effectiveness of cortisone cream on this species of ant bite.....(we have multiple biting species here)
Archmage Atlantis: :) *g*
Eliza Madrigal: yes important to have those kinds of creams in Florida
Eliza Madrigal: mosquitos are ferocious
Dash Earthboy: apparently no lack of topics for us then :)
Eliza Madrigal: :)

Archmage Atlantis: The quilts on the line behind you Eliza......they remind me of driving through the Carolinas as a kid.......handsewn quilts hung out to sell to passing tourists
Eliza Madrigal: aw, that's nice Arch... I can see that
Dash Earthboy: *in my mind I'm goin to Carolina
Archmage Atlantis: :)
Eliza Madrigal: :)) hums

Eliza Madrigal: What about 'shyness' as a topic?
Dash Earthboy: *can't ya just feel the moonshine?
Archmage Atlantis: So much of the earth has been urbanized........yes, shyness is a good topic.......I was terribly shy once upon a time
Eliza Madrigal: were you Arch? in childhood or later?
Archmage Atlantis: Throught the early 30's (agewise) Eliza
Cosmicflower Ushimawa: I have noticed to be shy when its needed and very much loud when that is needed too
Eliza Madrigal: that's interesting Cosmic!
Eliza Madrigal: similar to what I've noticed... used to think I understood what shyness was, and that I was that :)
Archmage Atlantis: Cos, that is to be demure when it is useful, and loud when required by circumstance, imho
Cosmicflower Ushimawa: in a way I couldn`t hep it... if I just had feeling to be quiet and like looking things in silence, I think there is strong reason for it
milakel Resident: hi :)
Eliza Madrigal: Hi MIla :)
Archmage Atlantis: Hi, Mila
Cosmicflower Ushimawa: and sometimes there have come huge much out of me to say
Dash Earthboy: hey Mila
Eliza Madrigal: we're talking about shyness :)
Wol Euler: hello mila
milakel Resident: aha! more picnic stuff! :)
Eliza Madrigal: well quilts for picnics maybe ;-)
FcSeeker Resident: hello milakel
Archmage Atlantis: :)
Eliza Madrigal: So it surprises you when you aren't shy Cosmic?
Cosmicflower Ushimawa: No, I just think there is propably some reason for it, I feel not to talk

--BELL--

Cosmicflower Ushimawa: or be like just looking things
milakel Resident: *looks at the eliza cloud*
Cosmicflower Ushimawa: observing.
Dash Earthboy: hey Zon
Eliza Madrigal: :)
Zon Kwan: heyhey
Eliza Madrigal: Hi Zon :)
Eliza Madrigal: maybe a difference in shy and quiet then?
Archmage Atlantis: heyhey Zon
FcSeeker Resident: Hello Zon
Arisia Vita: shy and quiet are often found holding hands....
Archmage Atlantis: A Venn diagram, Eliza.......an overlap between two sets
Eliza Madrigal: :) Ari
Zon Kwan: whats the subject ?
Eliza Madrigal: Ah, yes Arch too
milakel Resident: shyness, zon
Zon Kwan: ah
Eliza Madrigal: Shyness, Zon :)
Archmage Atlantis: Ari is more poetic than I
Zon Kwan: quietness is not same
Wol Euler: hello zon, korel
Eliza Madrigal: Hi Korel :)
Korel Laloix: Heya
Eliza Madrigal: quiet doesn't seem to have 'fear'
FcSeeker Resident: Hello Korel
Dash Earthboy: hey Korel
Zon Kwan: hi
Korel Laloix: quiet takes a while to seep into you.
Zon Kwan: shy is not daring to do what one would like to do
Wol Euler nods.
Eliza Madrigal: mmmm
Cosmicflower Ushimawa: well
Cosmicflower Ushimawa: I am not sure about that
Archmage Atlantis: "Um pitu? Korel"...good
milakel Resident: zon, is it fear?
Zon Kwan: there is an inner pressure to do something
Zon Kwan: and a hindrance
Eliza Madrigal: but also a gift, if there are gifts to be had in 'observing'?
Zon Kwan: a conflict
milakel Resident: fear of the consequence

Cosmicflower Ushimawa: I do not think I have been not daring If I have felt to be silent and observing
Zon Kwan: observe is not same as shy
Cosmicflower Ushimawa: some might "think" I have been "shy"
Cosmicflower Ushimawa: easily
Eliza Madrigal: but the shy by default may become observers

milakel Resident: who can call him/her-self shy in here?

Cosmicflower Ushimawa: "Shy" can also be "sensing" environment and energies
Zon Kwan: to expereince oneself is not same as what others think
Cosmicflower Ushimawa: ond "others" thinks person to be shy
Archmage Atlantis: Indeed, Eliza
Eliza Madrigal: I still have shyness in some contexts but can't classify myself as shy anymore
milakel Resident: :)
milakel Resident: i think it's a nice mix, eliza :)
Wol Euler smiles.
Cosmicflower Ushimawa: hmmm
Dash Earthboy: *is hiding in a cloud being shy?
Eliza Madrigal nods
Cosmicflower Ushimawa: or making a shelter

Korel Laloix: I can;t rember anyone ever accusing me of being shy.... smiles

Cosmicflower Ushimawa: thinking opposite ways... person who is "shy"
milakel Resident: korel :) no one would dare! :)
Eliza Madrigal: yes, and some who come across as overbearing may actually be shy but overcompensating
Archmage Atlantis: Somehow, I believe that Korel
Cosmicflower Ushimawa: and person who is "not shy" and loud all the time
Dash Earthboy: :)
Cosmicflower Ushimawa: witch one might "listen" more
milakel Resident: i am shy though

Zon Kwan: In humans, shyness (also called diffidence) is a social psychology term used to describe the feeling of apprehension, lack of comfort, or awkwardness experienced when a person is in proximity to, approaching, or being approached by other people, especially in new situations or with unfamiliar people. Shyness may come from genetic traits, the environment in which a person is raised and personal experiences. There are many degrees of shyness. Stronger forms are usually referred to as social anxiety or social phobia. Shyness may merely be a personality trait or can occur at certain stages of development in children. Shyness has also a strong cultural dimension.
milakel Resident: oh, wiki :)

Eliza Madrigal: in RL or across the board do you think, Mila?
milakel Resident: less so in sl :)
Archmage Atlantis: Quite clinical Zon
Dash Earthboy: good info there Zon :)

milakel Resident: eliza, but then, at critical moments i can be bold :)

Eliza Madrigal: :)
Archmage Atlantis: Love is not a victory march.....shy or not shy?
Zon Kwan: well..just for reference
Zon Kwan: isnt shyness near hesitation too

FcSeeker Resident: I just got these words from one of my friend who is very shy;
FcSeeker Resident:

I am the diamond glints on snow. I am the sunlight on the ripened grain. I am the gentle Autumn's rain. When you awaken in the morning hush, I am the swift uplifting rush of quiet birds in circled flight. I am the soft stars that shine at night.

Wol Euler smiles.
Eliza Madrigal: beautiful :) FcS and Friend
Cosmicflower Ushimawa: _/!\_
Archmage Atlantis: That is beautiful FC.......and brave, not shy
FcSeeker Resident: so beautiful things can be created by shy mind :)

Eliza Madrigal: it can be extreme self-consciousness I suppose... an 'everyone is looking at me'... that's what I felt as a child
--BELL--
Eliza Madrigal: Indeed FcS
Archmage Atlantis: I am typing into the silent time, Eliza, but that which is beautiful is looked at by many....
Korel Laloix: I just see being shy as inefficient... that being said, being very un shy has very efficient gotten me into a lot of trouble from time to time.... grins
Dash Earthboy: in some, shyness, to a degree, may be overcome by courage
Eliza Madrigal smiles at the falling blossoms
Dash Earthboy: momentarily at least
Eliza Madrigal: mmmm

milakel Resident: "shyness has also a strong cultural dimension" - this is interesting. i assume an american in most countries would not be considered a shy person :)
Dash Earthboy: :)
Zon Kwan: no..lol
FcSeeker Resident: to my this friend the shyness is the shelter
Dash Earthboy: few visitors to foreign countries are identified by the locals as "shy"
milakel Resident: if you take japan, i think in many cases shyness is simply a part of culture
Eliza Madrigal: well, different sense of containment
Eliza Madrigal: :)
Zon Kwan: or is it being reserved
milakel Resident: or carries a different meaning
Archmage Atlantis: North, Central, or South American Mila?
milakel Resident: :)
milakel Resident: i'll skip that

Wol Euler: I think there are two separate things here: feeling shy, and others attributing shyness to you

Dash Earthboy: for Japan, Zon, I think "reserved" is better ID
Eliza Madrigal: there is also an elegance that is in some sense, quite bold
Zon Kwan: yes wol
Eliza Madrigal: yes Wol
Dash Earthboy: yes, actors and audiences :)
Eliza Madrigal: when a young teen, on my first babysitting job, I came into the house (kids were already asleep) and stayed in one spot the whole time, didn't change the channel on the tv even, hah
FcSeeker Resident: I have felt very often shyness, but tired to hide it to much speaking...
Eliza Madrigal: my sense of not intruding was so strong, overly so
milakel Resident: eliza, so cute :)
FcSeeker Resident: tried
Archmage Atlantis: To me, there is a shy that might be equated with fear
FcSeeker Resident: so I have not much called to be shy but by few people
milakel Resident: fc, interesting. did it work?
Dash Earthboy: some things may be more akin to timidity than shyness?

FcSeeker Resident: well; then I have forgottan my shyness...
Eliza Madrigal: :))
FcSeeker Resident: so might that have worked ...if you mean that

Eliza Madrigal: yes I think that's what happens now, I forget it... or it is in perspective of a wider range of dynamics
Archmage Atlantis: Then stop pushing that d....n button that make you disappear, FC
FcSeeker Resident: my father tought me that I am allowed to speak
Dash Earthboy: :) @ Arch
 

Timidity...

milakel Resident: dash, hmm... maybe shyness is fear of being inappropriate and timidity is lack of confidence?
FcSeeker Resident: ...?
Eliza Madrigal: interesting
Dash Earthboy: timidity is more fear of acting (lack of confidence)
Dash Earthboy: and maybe shyness is more fear of people (lack of confidence)?
Zon Kwan: isnt shy same as timid ?
Dash Earthboy: i 've heard them used synonymously

Archmage Atlantis: Hale Atraxia
FcSeeker Resident: Hello Atraxia
Ataraxia Azemus: Hi everyone :)
Dash Earthboy: hey Ataraxia
Zon Kwan: ata
Archmage Atlantis: Descinding from on high
Wol Euler: hello violet
Wol Euler: have you been here before?
Ataraxia Azemus: Yes :)
Wol Euler: ok, just checking
milakel Resident: violet :)
Eliza Madrigal: Hi Ataraxia :)
Ataraxia Azemus: :)
Archmage Atlantis: Really wol, have any of us been here b4?
milakel Resident: i love this tree - thank you, eliza :)
Wol Euler: yes, arch
Eliza Madrigal: I'm reminded that the Ways of Knowing workshop at Kira wil begin in just a few minutes
Eliza Madrigal: :) Welcome, Mila... enjoying it too
Zon Kwan: whats it about ?
milakel Resident: ah, thanks, wok indeed
Eliza Madrigal: does anybody really know what time it is....
Zon Kwan: i know
Archmage Atlantis: That is a good segway, eliaz
Wol Euler: 25 or 6 to 4
Eliza Madrigal: Oh, Zon...yes interesting topic "Shame"
milakel Resident: sounds like a trick question :)
Eliza Madrigal: hahah
Zon Kwan: but i have forgotten it
Eliza Madrigal: nah, would I do that... try to trick people?
milakel Resident: :P
Eliza Madrigal: :))
Zon Kwan: shame shame i must go to that
Cosmicflower Ushimawa: Dears I think I will go to see "Dream" pictures.
Eliza Madrigal: Before that the discussion was 'edge of practice'
Eliza Madrigal: Nice to see you Cosmic
Archmage Atlantis: No you would not, Eliza......but you would ..... like my mom.....challenge them
Eliza Madrigal: Be well and happy
Cosmicflower Ushimawa: Same words
Wol Euler: bye cosmic,take care
Zon Kwan: bye cosmic
Eliza Madrigal: :)
FcSeeker Resident: was gtsy Cos
Ataraxia Azemus: I'm going to head over, too....take care, everyone :)
Dash Earthboy: bye Cosmic
FcSeeker Resident: have good night :)
Archmage Atlantis: Blessings and Namaste

Cosmicflower Ushimawa: I enjoyed Huge MUCH of You all

Wol Euler: I'm going to skip WoK today, too tired
Cosmicflower Ushimawa: Namaste Dears
Ataraxia Azemus: Be well, Wol :)
Wol Euler: goodnight all, take care
Zon Kwan: i am going to shame
Eliza Madrigal: yes, you've been 'quiet' Wol :)
Wol Euler: sorry :)
Eliza Madrigal: Night and rest up, see you soon!
Wol Euler: yes! wow
milakel Resident: imagine how ashamed one has to be to commit a seppuku
Eliza Madrigal: :))
Wol Euler: breakfast on sunday
Dash Earthboy: Rest easy Wol
milakel Resident: shy woly :)
Arisia Vita: I too will head for WoK
Eliza Madrigal: Yes, see you bright and early Sunday
Wol Euler beams
Wol Euler: bb
Zon Kwan: seppuku ? harakiri ?
Arisia Vita: great being close to you all
milakel Resident: yes, zen
Eliza Madrigal: thanks Ari, nice for you to stay
Zon Kwan: yes not shy
Eliza Madrigal: how did we get to seppuku??

--BELL--

Zon Kwan: but ashamed
milakel Resident: eliza :)
Dash Earthboy: i'm just heading for the kitchen...good place to meet sometimes :)
milakel Resident: via zon's "shame"
Dash Earthboy: bye y'all
Korel Laloix: ciao
milakel Resident: fridge well, dash
Eliza Madrigal: Bye Dash!
FcSeeker Resident: namaste
Eliza Madrigal: Bye Zon!
Eliza Madrigal: Bye FcS!
Zon Kwan: going to workshop..see ya
milakel Resident: korel? you've been so quiet today, you little shy girl :)
Eliza Madrigal: haha... poof poof poof
Korel Laloix: In and out.
milakel Resident: hehe
Korel Laloix: Putting furnature together.
Eliza Madrigal: She's bold in a bikini
milakel Resident: ha!
Eliza Madrigal: :)
Zon Kwan: dont be shy..show us
Korel Laloix: Not onpurpose.... was so lagged I could not change.
Eliza Madrigal: its cute
milakel Resident: or maybe you wanted to seduce someone, huh? :)
Eliza Madrigal: might be fun to have sand around the fountain some day
Korel Laloix: I AM NOT CUTE>>> I AM BUTCH..... lol
Eliza Madrigal: beach chairs
Eliza Madrigal: hahah Korel :)
milakel Resident: cute butch girl :P
Eliza Madrigal: hahah
Korel Laloix: I soooo hate being called cute.. grrrrr
Korel Laloix: lol
milakel Resident: *giggles*
Eliza Madrigal: my younger daughter would get mad too... people would call her 'una muneca' which is little doll
milakel Resident: been called cute too often in school? :)
Eliza Madrigal: and she'd put her head in my stomach and growl
Eliza Madrigal: "i not cute!"
Korel Laloix: lol
milakel Resident: haha
Eliza Madrigal: but that was cute
milakel Resident: that *is* cute :)

Korel Laloix: Eviently.... I overcompensate for being short by being pushy, aggressive and generally iritating.
Eliza Madrigal: :))
Korel Laloix: Nto that I have noticed that.
milakel Resident: ah, fair enough :)
Eliza Madrigal: augmentative RL
Korel Laloix smiles
milakel Resident: i'm glad for your kids, eliza. such a wonderful mother they have :)
Korel Laloix: I am not realy liking this mint bikini.....
milakel Resident: korel, yes, not quite a butch color :)
Eliza Madrigal: that's nice of you to say Mila... jury is out on that one
Korel Laloix: I only wear one pieces RL but I can't find any good ones for free in SL.
milakel Resident: :)
Eliza Madrigal: that's true Korel!
Eliza Madrigal: very hard to find a normal looking full piece bathing suit
Korel Laloix: Being hot but not near a beach really makes me miss florida.
Eliza Madrigal: designers listen up I guess
Korel Laloix: Lets see if I can change now.
Eliza Madrigal: well I'm hot and in florida and not near the beach
Korel Laloix: Maybe a little better.
Korel Laloix: But i really don't wear pink.
milakel Resident: hmm, i have something in my inventory...
Eliza Madrigal: hehe.... and on my way to Canada
Eliza Madrigal: Oh, thats great too
Korel Laloix: Canada sounds way too cold.
Korel Laloix: Kansas sounds way to cold to me though...
Eliza Madrigal: kansas makes me think of tornados and hm... what are those things that roll across the road....
milakel Resident: i like rainy bergen :)
Eliza Madrigal: :))
Korel Laloix: I don't mind tornadoes... we hae a lot more of them in OK then KS.

Korel Laloix: Tubleweeds you are thinking of?
Eliza Madrigal: YES!
Eliza Madrigal: tumbleweeds
Korel Laloix: Almost got knocked off the road by one of those in New Mexico I think it was.
milakel Resident: eliza, you're still a cloud to me :/
Eliza Madrigal: love them... remember them driving on the way to colorado, but that was a long time ago
Eliza Madrigal: Aw Mila :(
Eliza Madrigal: I rebaked a few times
Eliza Madrigal: but I look the same as last time you saw me
Eliza Madrigal: I like your dress, btw... summery and light....
Eliza Madrigal: well...
Eliza Madrigal: haha
milakel Resident: *shows off her bikini* :)
Eliza Madrigal: yes you changed just as I said that
Korel Laloix: lol.... brb
milakel Resident: thank you, eliza
Eliza Madrigal: I could show off mine but since I'm a cloud it wouldn't matter
Eliza Madrigal: heheh
milakel Resident: :)
milakel Resident: sadly
Eliza Madrigal: I have to get going anyway, too... son has a friend coming to pick him up to play
milakel Resident: wait, aren't we going to wok?
milakel Resident: ah, alright :)
Eliza Madrigal: there's the door bell!
milakel Resident: tada!
Eliza Madrigal: Have fun!! (Bye Korel!)
milakel Resident: cu