2008.12.02 01:00 - Saying brb to Being

That night I, Pema, was the guardian on call. This was the fourth of the four weekly guardian meetings that we now hold around each weekend, at Saturday 7 pm, Sunday 1 pm, Monday 7 am and Tuesday 1 am.

With a remarkable stroke of luck, I had been able to attend the third meeting, just before boarding my plane in New York for a 14 hour flight to Tokyo, and I was also in time now to attend the fourth meeting, just after arriving in my hotel in Tokyo.

Sonic Moonites: hello Becka
You: Hi Sonic
Sonic Moonites: how are you?
You: I'm ok thank you
Becka Finesmith: Haven't had time to fully rez in my real life yet ;)
Sonic Moonites: hi pema
Pema Pera: Hi Becka and Sonic!
Becka Finesmith: HI Pema - You arrived quickly :)
Sonic Moonites: right on the bell ;)
Pema Pera: yes, I was lucky
Pema Pera: no delay in my flight
Wester Kiranov: hi
Becka Finesmith: Brilliant. Settled in?
Becka Finesmith: HI Wester
Pema Pera: pretty amazing timing too! I boarded my plane ten minutes after the last guardian meeting, and I literally arrived in my hotel ten minutes ago!
Pema Pera: Hi Wester!
Becka Finesmith: lol
Pema Pera: Now I know why those guardan meetings are timed with intervals of 18 hours . . . .
Sonic Moonites: ;)
Becka Finesmith: Glad option 2 was chosen :)

Becka refered to a discussion we recently had about how to organize our weekly guardian meetings. Another option had been to have all four of these meetings on the same day, which would have left only 6 hours in between the start of successive meetings, rather than the current 18 hours.

Pema Pera: yes, six hours would have required me to take a rocket flight . . . .
Wester Kiranov: :)
Pema Pera: How are you, Wester, getting used to Play as Being?
Wester Kiranov: i am, actually
Pema Pera: I'm glad to see you coming back :)
Wester Kiranov: i like it here :)
You: I had a bit of a crisis this morning :(
Wester Kiranov: becka - want to tell us about it?
Becka Finesmith: It started to think about what it would be like to lose all 5 of my senses
Becka Finesmith: which one could I not live without
Sonic Moonites: hm yeah, scary becka
Becka Finesmith: It came down to touch. But then I thought about perhaps that is what is holding me back from being
Becka Finesmith: *Being
Becka Finesmith: A sense of void. With no experience
Becka Finesmith: I felt like I was hanging on to this reality by a thread
Becka Finesmith: My feet dangling over a big sense of nothing
Becka Finesmith: if I let go, could I come back to a place where actually I feel quite comfortable
Sonic Moonites: hmm yes its strange perhaps senses provide a kind of crutch for us, without them it would be difficult to understand this world

An interesting discussion started about different forms of appreciation.

Becka Finesmith: but how to we appreciate Being without them.
Wester Kiranov: Why not experience Being using them to the full?
Wester Kiranov: then sometime you can try, carefully, to let go of them, bit by bit
Becka Finesmith: yes. But there comes a point where to fully appreciate, you have to let go completely. Which seems like a dichotomy. To fully appreciate, I have to release my ego
Becka Finesmith: But my Ego allows me to fully appreciate
Sonic Moonites: perhaps we think of appreciation in the wrong way
Becka Finesmith: Perhaps through this life, I have been far to wrapped up in my Ego?
Wester Kiranov: if you feel it's your Ego that allows you to appreciate, maybe you should not let go yet
Becka Finesmith: feeding it like a monstor
Wester Kiranov: letting go of Ego is a gradual process
Wester Kiranov: stop feeding it then
Sonic Moonites: i think its important to feel that you have been doing nothing "wrong" becka, in terms of being you cannot be doing it incorrectly
Becka Finesmith: It has grown around me to a point I can't break out of it?
Wester Kiranov: or put it on a diet ;)
Becka Finesmith: lol@Wester
Becka Finesmith: That would be a good step
Wester Kiranov: i think so
Wester Kiranov: if you try to do too much at once, it can get scary
Becka Finesmith: If Being is about knowing ones self (I phrase it like that deliberatly), then it is really opening my eyes
Wester Kiranov: i was just thinking, if you keep on doing something like the 9 second practice, you punch tiny holes in Ego, until it starts falling apart automatically
Becka Finesmith: That hasn't happened for me so far. The 9 seconds has so far made me more aware of it. It looms large like I didn't know it was there
Wester Kiranov: very important first step
Becka Finesmith nods

What does it mean to be wrapped up?

Wester Kiranov: first notice how much you are wrapped up in what you think is real
Becka Finesmith: COuldn't be more wrapped up unfortunately.
Becka Finesmith: at what point do we stop unwrapping
Wester Kiranov: You could be more wrapped up, otherwise you wouldn't be here
Becka Finesmith: :)
Wester Kiranov: You stop unwrapping when you get to the Present ;-P
Becka Finesmith: :)
Wester Kiranov: actually, you don't stop unwrapping at all
Becka Finesmith: It's like a russian doll
Becka Finesmith: I guess I'm on the outer layer at the moment
Becka Finesmith: I have no concept of what's in the centre although I can give it a name - Being
Becka Finesmith: There is one phrase that keeps me going
Becka Finesmith: "You are not who you think you are"
Pema Pera: yes, that is the key
Becka Finesmith: It's my sense of discovery and wonderment at that which makes me go forward
Pema Pera: and you can use that key in two ways
Pema Pera: a relatively more modest way and an extremely radical way
Sonic Moonites: *nods
Pema Pera: the modest way is to find out, step by step, how much more you are than you thought
Pema Pera: amazing discoveries, one after the other
Pema Pera: new landscapes, whole new realms
Pema Pera: each of which can feel like "waking up" and for good reason
Pema Pera: -- but then there is a very radical way
Pema Pera: in which you switch from you to Being
Pema Pera: totally different
Pema Pera: instead of identifying with the you you thought you were, you let Being Be
Pema Pera: that is by far the fastest and simplest way . . . . .
Becka Finesmith: each way leads to the radical?
Pema Pera: not "leads to"
Pema Pera: but "is allowed by"
Pema Pera: if you really like to continue to struggle unnecessarily :-)
Pema Pera: (saying all this totally seriously, not trying to be flippant)
Becka Finesmith: I don't want to struggle, but I'm not ready to let go of all I know yet
Becka Finesmith: So I must take the scenic route
Pema Pera: you will never be ready
Pema Pera: Being has always already been ready

Sonic pointed out that we cannot become Being.

Sonic Moonites: it feels strange to me that today we are thinking of becoming "being" as a struggle and a path....rather than a state we are itermittently in
Pema Pera: yes, you can certainly take the scenic route, and that is healthy and wholesome in many ways . . . .
Pema Pera: . . . . but at the _same_ time you can also try to take that route in a very light way
Pema Pera: ready to see through the joke . . . .
Pema Pera: we can never become Being
Wester Kiranov: sonic: all words are totally inadequate when you talk about Being
Pema Pera: we are IT already, Sonic
Sonic Moonites: agreed wester
Pema Pera: but words can point and help and guide
Sonic Moonites: yes, i agree, but dont we talk as if we have more to attain
Pema Pera: some words more than other -- so we all try to do our best here, as a group, which is really moving
Wester Kiranov: that's why we keep on talking to each other
Pema Pera: that talk we have to drop, Soni
Pema Pera: Sonic
Pema Pera: that is a misunderstanding
Pema Pera: there is nothing to attain
Pema Pera: that is the deep meaning of "stopping"
Pema Pera: we stop every 15 minutes for 9 sec -- first to relax, than to see more, but the real meaning is what you pointed to!
Sonic Moonites: *nods
Pema Pera: so truly unbelievable . . . yet true
Sonic Moonites: strange i cant help but wonder about the role of "silence" in all this
Pema Pera: :)
Sonic Moonites: perhaps if we view language as being limited, it can also be viewed as misleading, so perhaps silence is the best way towards truth
Pema Pera: there is no "best" . . . from Being's point of view -- all is part of Being
Pema Pera: and the beauty of PaB is that it allows and encourages so many approaches!
Pema Pera: though some may certainly work better than others, that I agree with

We talked about the limits of language.

Wester Kiranov: if you try to use language to point at Being, at least you see how it's inadequate
Pema Pera: but different ones for different people at different times . . . .
Sonic Moonites: yes
Wester Kiranov: but isn't silence a way of stopping?
Pema Pera: it can be
Pema Pera: talking can be too
Wester Kiranov: yes
Pema Pera: there is no formula for waking up, for seeing
Pema Pera: sharing that richness here helps us seeing beyond guide lines, rules, dogma, expectations . . .
Pema Pera: Becka, may I try to present an alternative to the scenic route -- and probably you will be best of trying both, the scenic route and my alternative
Pema Pera: just a metaphor, my favorite one, of a movie
Pema Pera: when terrible things happen in the movie, there are two things you can do:
Pema Pera: in order to liberate the beings in the movie
Pema Pera: one is to take scissors and walk up to the screen and try to cut out the beings from the screen to set them free . . . . . the other one is to realize that it is all a play of light; the first one is slow and may look scenic, the second one is the only one that ultimately will work
Pema Pera: (not to discourage "scenic" -- it can play its role for a while -- but don't hang on to it too long, you'll HAVE to give it up sooner or later)
Pema Pera: does that make some sense, that metaphor?
Becka Finesmith: I understand.
Becka Finesmith: It does make sense
Becka Finesmith: It sounds easy though - But why do we find Being so hard?
Pema Pera: we haven't talked about it enough yet
Becka Finesmith: perhaps I shouldn't even use the word Hard and Easy
Pema Pera: give us half a year and it will become clear I think
Becka Finesmith: ok
Pema Pera: yes!
Becka Finesmith: It is clearer now then ot was 4 weeks ago
Pema Pera: it is easier than easy and harder than hard
Pema Pera: but balance is very important
Pema Pera: don't drop "scenic" until it becomes a lot more clear
Becka Finesmith nods
Pema Pera: but already the knowledge that there *might* be a much more radical way will lighten the burden of the "scenic" by a large degree
Pema Pera: it will drop off by its own accord, like a ripe fruit

A cheerful remark about patience.

Becka Finesmith: I'm impatient - I want to know ;)
Pema Pera: hahaha
Pema Pera: yes, we all do
Pema Pera: that is EXACTLY what holds us back
Pema Pera: if we stop grasping, we realize that we are already there
Becka Finesmith: Does it need a purpose?
Pema Pera: Being knocks of the front door, and we say -- brb, have to run out of the back embarking on a long search!
Becka Finesmith: lol
Pema Pera: purpose is the wrong idea -- that also holds you back; NO PURPOSE
Pema Pera: no causality
Pema Pera: no time
Pema Pera: no beings
Pema Pera: no you
Pema Pera: no me
Pema Pera: but we can't live by denial only
Becka Finesmith: No work to do ----- D'oh
Pema Pera: we have to learn to see Being as a resource
Sonic Moonites: *nods
Pema Pera: if you can truly truly drop all work, all expectations, all programs, all hope and fear
Pema Pera: then you will see you are there already
Pema Pera: Being is the mother, waiting for the child to stop being engrossed by its toys
Pema Pera: very scenic toys . . . .
Becka Finesmith: :) I like the mother analogy

One by one, we began to say goodbye.

Wester Kiranov: have to go now, getting RL visitors now
Wester Kiranov: bye
Pema Pera: bye Wester, wonderful seeing you here again!
Becka Finesmith: YEs - I have to leave to. See you all later :)
Wester Kiranov: namaste
Pema Pera: and guess what, I also have to leave :-)
Sonic Moonites: good to see you becka
Becka Finesmith: namaste
Becka Finesmith: Nice to see you too Sonic. Bye Pema. :)
Pema Pera: I am really glad and grateful that we can have this kind of conversation
Pema Pera: we're really going to the core here
Becka Finesmith: It is helpful to me :)
Pema Pera: the chat log of this session could be used to practice for a life time . . . .
Becka Finesmith: :)
Pema Pera: for me too, Becka and Sonic
Pema Pera: seeing glimpses is not enough -- one has to then integrate
Becka Finesmith nods
Pema Pera: and each time we talk about this, it helps integration for all of us
Pema Pera: no one excluded
Pema Pera: btw, on a very mundane level :-)
Pema Pera: my computer frooze up
Sonic Moonites: :)
Pema Pera: and I missed a few lines at the beginning
Becka Finesmith: Do you want the chat log?
Pema Pera: yes, if you can email that
Pema Pera: that would be great
Becka Finesmith: sure :)
Pema Pera: or note card
Becka Finesmith: I'll do it now
Pema Pera: whatever is easiest
Pema Pera: then I can fill in the blankcs
Pema Pera: @#$%^&* Mac - SL interaction, sigh -- this "know problem" of LL
Becka Finesmith: heehe. No such issue on the pC :0
Pema Pera: Sonic, next time I'd love to hear more about contentment
Pema Pera: and how this fits in with what we were talking about
Sonic Moonites: ok Pema sure
Pema Pera: the positive side of Being
Pema Pera: no rush :)
Sonic Moonites: :)
Sonic Moonites: (im sinking :0)
Becka Finesmith gave you New Note.
Pema Pera: okay, see you both soon again!
Pema Pera: thanks, Becka!
Sonic Moonites: thanks pema, and thanks for the recent invite
Becka Finesmith: YW - See you both soon.