2011.01.01 13:00 - Resolutions, Compassion and Bling

The Guardian for this meeting was Aphrodite Macbain. The comments are by Aphrodite Macbain.

Aphrodite Macbain: Happy New Year Bruce
Bruce Mowbray: Happy New Year!
Bruce Mowbray: Is this your regular session?
Aphrodite Macbain: yes
Aphrodite Macbain: Did you celebrate?
Bruce Mowbray: I "celebrated" in a very mild way, yes. But nothing special.
Aphrodite Macbain: Hello Korel
Bruce Mowbray: How about you?
Bruce Mowbray: Hey, Korel. Welcome.
Korel Laloix: heya
Aphrodite Macbain: had dinner with friends, was home by 11:30. Watched the Band's Last Waltz on TV!
Aphrodite Macbain: Lorel, have you been here before?
Korel Laloix: YEs... normally Freud Jungsten...
Aphrodite Macbain: ah- welcome Freud!
Korel Laloix: Just in the process of making a new AV.
Bruce Mowbray: Well, I went to a "party" -- and at 9:30 there were only three of us remaining -- and at 10 p.m. the hostess said she wanted to go to sleep. . .
Bruce Mowbray: so i came home and celebrated with my dog.
Aphrodite Macbain: Bet he enjoyed himself
Bruce Mowbray: Oh hey, Freud!
Korel Laloix: I was in bed by 9 with a lot of Nyquil in my systerm
Aphrodite Macbain: :-)
Bruce Mowbray: I hope you don't have the creeping crud that's going around, Korwl.
Korel Laloix: Was not a good night.
Aphrodite Macbain: It was hard to stay asleep at midnight. The whole community goes outside and bangs their pots and pans!
Korel Laloix: Stil feeling a bit poopy.
Bruce Mowbray: Well, that's the main reason that our "party" broke up -- a couple of folks were sick, and the rest didn't want to catch what they had.
Aphrodite Macbain: any resolutions?
Aphrodite Macbain: not about the crud, about 2011
Korel Laloix: lol
Bruce Mowbray: It took me six weeks and two anti-biotics to get over it.
Korel Laloix: I typicaly can't sleep.. but with nyquil I could sleep through a tornado.
Bruce Mowbray: I have some very vague resolutions. . .
Korel Laloix: I want to get to and hold 90 lbs.
Aphrodite Macbain: I want to do something I've never done before
Korel Laloix: But that was a goal before though.
Aphrodite Macbain: what can you hold?
Korel Laloix: My weight.
Bruce Mowbray: "Hold"? -- as in weight lifting?
Bruce Mowbray: Oh -- your weight -- sorry.
Aphrodite Macbain: are you short and weigh 90lbs??
Korel Laloix: Sorry... not good at saying things in English.
Aphrodite Macbain: alors, en francais
Korel Laloix: Well 87 at the moment.
Aphrodite Macbain: you are tres petite
Korel Laloix: I noticed.
Bruce Mowbray: Oui!
Korel Laloix: So what thing do you want to do?

Bruce Mowbray: Me? - - - Well,,,, I will try to explain it. . .
Korel Laloix: Please do.
Korel Laloix: You need a new hobby?
Bruce Mowbray: I want to become more awake with my generosity. . .
Aphrodite Macbain: wish I knew but it has to do with learning how to do something new
Aphrodite Macbain: me? more than a hobby, a new passion
Aphrodite Macbain: can you explain what you mean by that Bruce.
Bruce Mowbray: Well, I want to be very clear about WHY I give when I give.
Korel Laloix: Why do you want to be clear?
Bruce Mowbray: I want it to be about compassion -- not about some "obligation" or "ego inflation" or something like that.
Korel Laloix: I really dont' think muchwhen I give at least .
Aphrodite Macbain: Bruce you are by nature very generous. are you questioning your motives?
Bruce Mowbray: Mostly because I am about to welcome a homeless man into my home - to stay here until he can find a place to live and employent...
Aphrodite Macbain: I suspect it comes naturally, not because you feel you MUST
Bruce Mowbray: and I want to be really clear about what I am doing and why.
Korel Laloix: That is a big commitment.
Tallin Dezno: hello aph, bruce and korel
Aphrodite Macbain: Hello Tallin
Korel Laloix: Heya
Bruce Mowbray: Hey, Tallin! Happy New Year!
Aphrodite Macbain: Why do you think you are inviting him Bruce?
Tallin Dezno: ty and same same bruce and all :-)
Bruce Mowbray: We've been discussing our new year resolutions, Tal.
Aphrodite Macbain: You've been here before, haven't you Tallin
Bruce Mowbray: And I've just explained that I want to become more awake with my generosity.
Tallin Dezno: yes i have, i´m bertram. i mean his alt. sry aph ... ;-)
Korel Laloix: Tis the alt seasons I guess... smiles
Tallin Dezno: ;-9
Tallin Dezno: and ty bruce
Aphrodite Macbain: are you worried that you are being generous for the wrong reasons?
Bruce Mowbray: Not really 'worried,' but concerned. .

.
--BELL--
Tallin Dezno: ah bah - the ugly nine again ! ;-)
Tallin Dezno: oops
Aphrodite Macbain: Or are you worried that being too generous will bring about new difficulties, unanticipated consequences?
Korel Laloix: I think the only positive thing I got from my mother was a desired to make a difference... volunteering and giving...
Aphrodite Macbain: That's a pretty big gift Korel
Korel Laloix: For that I am thankful.. yes.
Bruce Mowbray listens for more from Korel.
Korel Laloix: NOt sure why I do it... just seems natural
Korel Laloix: I would not welcome a homeless guy into the house though....
Aphrodite Macbain: yes, we can be generous and try and give what we feel we can
Aphrodite Macbain: but not more
Aphrodite Macbain: Bruce- do you feel you need to develop rules /boundaries about your generosity?
Bruce Mowbray: Well, two weeks ago at the in-world retreat, this was my main question. . . and I came out of the retreat with clarity about it.
Aphrodite Macbain: and what became clear Bruce?
Aphrodite Macbain: Hi arabella, happy new year!
arabella Ella: Hiya everyone!
arabella Ella: Happy New Year to you too!
Bruce Mowbray: Hello, ara! Happy New Year!
Korel Laloix: Clarity=?
Aphrodite Macbain: comprehension Korel
Korel Laloix: Ok.
Bruce Mowbray: What became clear was that we ALL have a yearning to survive and be unharmed . . . and I recognize the anguish of others as OURS - not only as THEIRS.
Tallin Dezno: hi ara - happy new year :-)
Aphrodite Macbain: you own their anguish?
Aphrodite Macbain: honour it?
arabella Ella: hey tallin same to u only just rezzed
Aphrodite Macbain: but how do you act upon it?
Bruce Mowbray: Yes, "honor it" as ours - -
Bruce Mowbray: As I said before, I want it to be about compassion -- not about some "obligation" or "ego inflation" or something like that.
arabella Ella: respect it, recognise it, etc
Korel Laloix: But is there something wrong with doing good out of requirements?
Bruce Mowbray: No - nothing wrong with that -- except that's a different deal, for me.
Korel Laloix: It has been said that is it easier to act your way into a new way of thinking than thinking your way into a new way of acting.
Aphrodite Macbain: I've often thought about inviting homeless people to my place - to eat, clean up, rest. But have never done it for fear of something going wrong
Tallin Dezno: i appreciate your words very much bruce but would like to put an emphasis on being aware when we act like that
Bruce Mowbray: Absolutely, Tal, and that was my very first statement -- become more awake with my generosity.
Aphrodite Macbain: Fear of the consequences
Tallin Dezno: yes. i read it. only wanted to put the emphasis on it again from my side. sry
Bruce Mowbray: Aph asked us about our new years resolutions, and my response was: I want to become more awake with my generosity. . .
Korel Laloix: You have to balance giving and helping.
Aphrodite Macbain: with what?
Bruce Mowbray: np. But in my life, there are patterns of "helping" than ended up being psycho-nightmares for ME. . .
Korel Laloix: Doing the right thing.. vs what seems right.
Tallin Dezno: because : sometimes such a way of helping is best, sometimes letting go can be better. needs lots of wisdom to see that clearly in all situations as far i can see that
Bruce Mowbray: and I feel that this is another opportunity to learn more about myself. . .
Korel Laloix: Like sending cow milk based baby formula to AFrica.... very bad news... good intentions, bad results.
Aphrodite Macbain: there are many ways of helping
Bruce Mowbray: Yes, compassion without wisdom is potentially harmful for all involved.
Aphrodite Macbain: some compassionate acts are wiser or more useful than others
Bruce Mowbray: But sometimes is different: Like you run into a burning house to rescue someone, and when you get out and have time to think about what you've done,,,
Tallin Dezno: i look very much forward to what will happen on your path bruce and hope you will be able to tell us something from it and that it goes very well, for sure ...
Korel Laloix: But I think Bruice is mainly talking about intent?
Bruce Mowbray: you say, "WOW -- That was really stupid of me!"
Bruce Mowbray: and yet, there was an inner "imperative" to do it.
Bruce Mowbray: and that's what I am feeling right now.
Tallin Dezno: :-)
arabella Ella: ehrm ... why do you say 'it was stupid' after the event if nothing drastic went wrong?
Aphrodite Macbain: still, it takes bravery to perform an act of kindness that gives discomfort- it's like your gut and your brain are at odds
Korel Laloix: It could have gone wrong>
arabella Ella: why reflect on the past hypothetical?
Aphrodite Macbain: perhaps to learn from it ara
arabella Ella: posibly
Bruce Mowbray: No one runs into a burning house -- if he thinks seriously about it first. . . But if one is operating on an inner imperative, then it's a whole other ball game.
Tallin Dezno: i wanted to do once the same thing bruce (!) - and when i told it a friend who works as a social worker he said : don´t do such ! but it was solved so to say "automatically" - the homeless guy didn´t appear to our date ...
--BELL--
Bruce Mowbray: Yes, Aph -- "like your brain and your gut are at odds. . . " except in the case of the homeless man, they are together.
Aphrodite Macbain: Have you invited him into your home bruce: and if so, i there a problem?
Bruce Mowbray: anyway, the whole point of my new years resolution is NOT about homeless persons, it is about working on my own clarity.
Aphrodite Macbain: yes, thinking about what motivates us - important work
Tallin Dezno: and another thing : i helped in a similar way somebody - who steal then money from my flat and disappeared, after a few days - so i know now : when i would do such again - i simply would be more careful.
Bruce Mowbray: He contacted our Quaker group -- and the word went out -- and no one else would take him...
Bruce Mowbray: He's working in Kentucky now and will be working there until mid-January --
arabella Ella: have you met him yet Bruce?
Bruce Mowbray: I told him that if by then he had not found another place, he could stay here temporarily "as a last resort" --
Bruce Mowbray: because the only place I have for him is the living room couch.
Bruce Mowbray: I have no spare bedroom etc.
arabella Ella: yes
Bruce Mowbray: I've also told him that I am a hermit.
Bruce Mowbray: So, we've had two LONG phone conversations, and I really like the guy,. . .
arabella Ella: you are a hermit but not on SL are you?
Aphrodite Macbain: you will no longer be a hermit - how will that effct you?
Bruce Mowbray: but as I've said a couple of times, it is not really about HIM. It is about me -- my clarity, my compassion, my inflated ego, my own NEED to help, etc.
Bruce Mowbray: and that's my new year's resolution; to get more clarity about those things.
arabella Ella: but you dont have an inflated ego at all Bruce
arabella Ella: and there is nothing wrong with feeling a need to help others
Aphrodite Macbain: yes but this is not just theoretical, you are acting out your beiefs and values
Bruce Mowbray: Folks. . . . when you ask me a question - and I am trying to type and answer. . .
arabella Ella: exactly
Bruce Mowbray: and then in the middle of my answer. . .you type a few more questions. . .
arabella Ella smiles
arabella Ella: apologies
Bruce Mowbray: I am not aware of what you want me to answer. . .
Aphrodite Macbain: apologizes too
Bruce Mowbray sits on hands for a few minutes to let everything get caught up.
Tallin Dezno loves it
Aphrodite Macbain: what do others have as new year's resolutions?
Tallin Dezno: me : nothing
Bruce Mowbray loves it too!
arabella Ella: i dont generally have any
arabella Ella: but this year mine are quite mundane
arabella Ella: and include time management issues
Aphrodite Macbain: no goals? things to do? projects?
Tallin Dezno: no. all done here
Aphrodite Macbain: all done???
Tallin Dezno: yes
Tallin Dezno: all clear
Bruce Mowbray: ;-)
Aphrodite Macbain: nothing more to do except to be?
Tallin Dezno: likewise, yes
arabella Ella: i try to look at goals and projects more in the short term when possible
arabella Ella: i dont enjoy having goals which are over ambitious or impossible to achieve
Aphrodite Macbain: why do you have ??? after your name bruce?
arabella Ella: i dont see any ???
'Bruce Mowbray: It's the viewer -- takes a while to catch up with us -- You guys also have "????'s" for your names.
Tallin Dezno: that has to do with the new name features i guess
Bruce Mowbray: The viewer has this thing about "Staying in the Open Question."
Tallin Dezno: and - hello mick ! happy 2011 ! :-)
arabella Ella: Hiya Mick Happy New Year!
Aphrodite Macbain: oh. interesting. - funny that only bruce has them
Bruce Mowbray: Happy New Year, Mick!
Mickorod Renard: Hiyaaa,,happy New Yearrr
Aphrodite Macbain: Happy New Year Mick
Mickorod Renard: yeaaaaaa
Tallin Dezno: hello arch
Mickorod Renard: thankyou,,all the best to you
Aphrodite Macbain: any plans for 2011 Mick?
Mickorod Renard: just to take a dream and make it real
Tallin Dezno: a special dream mick ?
Tallin Dezno: happy new year to you
Aphrodite Macbain: Hi Arch!
arabella Ella: Hiya Arch
Aphrodite Macbain: what's new apart from the year?
Mickorod Renard: Hiya Archy, Happy new year
Bruce Mowbray: Hey, Arch. Happy New Year!
Archmage Atlantis: *Rubs eyes, looks around, and wonders where he is and who these entities are....
Aphrodite Macbain: Dream??
Archmage Atlantis: *Begans to wake up, and remembers....
Archmage Atlantis: *That e's afternoon nap of the elderly, probably lead to a dream of a younger time.
Archmage Atlantis: Grecians, meine Freunde :)
Aphrodite Macbain: NICE
Archmage Atlantis: glückliches neues Jahr!
Tallin Dezno: hehe. ty arch :-)
Aphrodite Macbain: dankear

Arch disappears
Tallin Dezno: THAT was a short visit ! ;-)
Aphrodite Macbain: he's gone back to sleep
arabella Ella: may be sleepwalking perhaps?
Aphrodite Macbain: :-)
Tallin Dezno: we don´t know ... :-)
Aphrodite Macbain: Maybe we are dreaming
Mickorod Renard: he he h
Mickorod Renard: I will be back in a moment

Tallin Dezno: little bruce drinking sparkling wine tz tz (?) ... ;-)
arabella Ella: what about yourself Aph?
arabella Ella: any resolutions?
Aphrodite Macbain: I want to do something COMPLETELY different this year
arabella Ella: yes?
arabella Ella: can u say more pls?
Aphrodite Macbain: something new- something I've never done before
arabella Ella: bungie jumping? (I hope not!)
Tallin Dezno: whaow - i thought the same ara - for me ... ;-)
--BELL--
arabella Ella: :)
Aphrodite Macbain: nope- but something that will shake me out of my torpor
Mickorod Renard: for me too Aphro, I need to make things happen this year
Aphrodite Macbain: something will allow me to see the world differently. Like a child.
arabella Ella: do u need any suggestions Aph or do you have ideas?
Aphrodite Macbain: well ideas have included travel, (of course), reading new things, going on a retreat, learning to play a musical instrument
Aphrodite Macbain: learning a new language
Aphrodite Macbain: organizing a project I care about
arabella Ella: spending a vacation helping people in a developing country?
Aphrodite Macbain: where I learn new things and awarenesses as I go
Bruce Mowbray ponders shipping the homeless man off to Aph -- so she can have a new experience.
Tallin Dezno: lol bruce
Aphrodite Macbain giggles
Mickorod Renard: maybe thats what i will try, learning to play the piano,,that would be like a dream
Aphrodite Macbain: yes- that sounds good.

Bruce Mowbray: Learning to play the piano is a great idea.
Aphrodite Macbain: I'd just need to buy a piano! and find a place to put it
Aphrodite Macbain: Perhaps a penny whistle
Mickorod Renard: I have one parked in my lounge, but I dont know how to play it
Aphrodite Macbain: I am seriously thinking about joining a choir; I just can't read music
Bruce Mowbray: They make "keyboards" that imitate real pianos incredibly well -- even have the key action of a real piano.
Bruce Mowbray: (but take up much less space).
Aphrodite Macbain: that's true
Mickorod Renard: good point bruce
Bruce Mowbray: Radio Shack actually sells one that is remarkably good.
Aphrodite Macbain: yes? can you play?
Bruce Mowbray: and it is on sale this month.
arabella Ella: do you play any instruments Bruce and all here?
Bruce Mowbray: I started playing the piano when I was 5 and rebelled against it when i was 16 -- so, yes, I can play -- but don't do it often anymore.
Tallin Dezno: guitar and a bit piano. as amateur
Aphrodite Macbain: I once played a melophone- a cheap version of a french horn. I was a disaster
arabella Ella smiles
Bruce Mowbray: not so mellow, then?
Mickorod Renard: I played a piece of large grass between my fingers as a kid,,then progressed to a piece of toilet paper over a hair comb
arabella Ella: and i can play the radio
Aphrodite Macbain grins
Aphrodite Macbain: I used to play the spoons
Aphrodite Macbain: and when I lived in Newfoundland, I played the penny whistle
Tallin Dezno: hi brain - happy new year ! :-)
Brian Roop: hello everyone
Mickorod Renard: I belched a good tune once
Aphrodite Macbain: Hi Brian
Mickorod Renard: Hi Brain
Bruce Mowbray: Hey, Brian! Happy New Year!
Aphrodite Macbain: Bruce- why have you just got very small?
Brian Roop: happy new year to all
Bruce Mowbray: The chanpagne, I guess.
Aphrodite Macbain: HNY Brian
Korel Laloix: I have no musical tallents or aspirations.... but lots of folks I know want to play an instrament... but don't do it.... why is that?

Mickorod Renard: HNY Brain
arabella Ella: Hiya Brian
Brian Roop: yes, a good 2011 to us all
Bruce Mowbray: perhaps you are already satisfied with the music of the spheres, Korel.
arabella Ella: good question Korel, I too have no musical talent!
Mickorod Renard: do we need to ask Brain if he's been before?
Tallin Dezno: no
Mickorod Renard: :)
Tallin Dezno: :-)
Brian Roop: been here before
Bruce Mowbray: no, you do not need to ask.
Aphrodite Macbain: Drinking champagne stunts your growth Bruce
Mickorod Renard: ohh of course,I remember now
Mickorod Renard: sorry Brian
Brian Roop: np, lots of people come and go here
Brian Roop: and i was away from it for a while
Aphrodite Macbain: Good to see you back Brian
Bruce Mowbray: a naked woman drove Brian away --- ooops, shouldn't have said that...
Bruce Mowbray: blame it on the champagne.
Brian Roop: ah bruce, i see you're indulging your inner child again
Bruce Mowbray: ;-)
Brian Roop: but your inner child should leave that stuff alone
Bruce Mowbray: Yeppers, he's taking over, too.
Brian Roop: likeyour hat btw
Bruce Mowbray: My inner child is a party animal.
Brian Roop: one inner child deserves another
Particle beams emit from many avis turning the pavilion into a magical faery lights

Aphrodite Macbain: That's an Inner glow on steroids
Brian Roop: for sure
--BELL--
Bruce Mowbray: Did you get those bad storms in Oklahoma, Korel?
Korel Laloix: Not on top of me.
Bruce Mowbray: sry.
Korel Laloix: For what?
Korel Laloix: Its Oklahoma... you sort of grow up with tornadoes here.
Mickorod Renard: were those the flood storms?
Aphrodite Macbain: You and Bruce seem to get those storms
Tallin Dezno: oops - sry and ty bruce lol
Aphrodite Macbain: Brilliant!
arabella Ella: ty bruce
Bruce Mowbray: yw!
Bruce Mowbray: Happy New Year!
arabella Ella: Happy New Year!!!!
Aphrodite Macbain: better than Christmas trees
arabella Ella: LOL
Mickorod Renard: ty bruce
arabella Ella: may i have one for RL too pls bruce?
Mickorod Renard: he he
Brian Roop: my turn
Tallin Dezno: hello thor
Thor Lumet: _/!\_ Namaste
Tallin Dezno: happy new year
arabella Ella: Hiya Thor!
Bruce Mowbray: Thanks, Brian!
Mickorod Renard: Hi Thor
Tallin Dezno: take a seat with us if you like plz
Bruce Mowbray: Hey, Thor. Happy New Year!
Brian Roop: happy new year thor
Aphrodite Macbain: Hi Thor
Thor Lumet: hi all
Thor Lumet: happy ny
Aphrodite Macbain: wondrous beings filled with energy
Brian Roop: or something
Aphrodite Macbain: amazing that champagne
Aphrodite Macbain: great effects
Bruce Mowbray: Wondrous inner children filled with champagne.
Mickorod Renard: yea, i keep seeing colours in front of my eyes
Thor Lumet: do I just wear it
Bruce Mowbray thinks Brian's inner child is really cool.
Brian Roop: not much being said here but the nonverbals are great
Aphrodite Macbain: yes
Mickorod Renard: we had a dance in the pool here 24 hours ago
Brian Roop: the champagne anim keeps standing me up
Brian Roop: something about being a minor i guess
Mickorod Renard: well,,22 hours ago
Brian Roop: oh bruce has gone batty agaun
Aphrodite Macbain: sorry I missed the dance. Hope it was fun
Tallin Dezno: i must retire a bit ...
Mickorod Renard: it was fun,,just a random thing,,nothing arranged
Mickorod Renard: bye Tallin
Aphrodite Macbain: The best kind
Tallin Dezno: bye and thanks ! :-)
Aphrodite Macbain: Bye
Aphrodite Macbain: Bye! ???
Bruce Mowbray: Happy New Year, Tal!
Mickorod Renard: Bruce, thats a great bat
Aphrodite Macbain: Looking for mosquitoes?
Aphrodite Macbain: ah back to "normal"
Aphrodite Macbain: Gotta go now. By all you batty beings
Mickorod Renard: bye aphro
Mickorod Renard: HNY
Aphrodite Macbain: se you tomorrow
Aphrodite Macbain: HNY!!
Brian Roop: Bye aphrodite
Bruce Mowbray: Happy New Year, Aph!
Zon Kwan: wow someone is enlighened
Brian Roop: hey zon
Zon Kwan: heya all
Mickorod Renard: yeaa,,Zon
Brian Roop: there's been an epidemic
Bruce Mowbray: Hey, Zon. Happy New Year!
Thor Lumet: Hi ZOn
Zon Kwan: shelters his eyes
arabella Ella: Hiya Zon Happy New Year
Zon Kwan: wow me tooo
Zon Kwan: finally
arabella Ella shelter my eyes now he he
--BELL--
Zon Kwan: after all these years
Brian Roop: he musta got nirvanaed
Thor Lumet: lol
arabella Ella: maybe he crashed like i did a few mins ago
Bruce Mowbray: Folks, I have promises to keep before I sleep -
arabella Ella: Yayyyyy Bruce seems to be back to his usual self
Bruce Mowbray: May you all have Happy New Year!
Bruce Mowbray: Bye for now.
Brian Roop: does bruce have a usual self?
Mickorod Renard: and u too Brucie
arabella Ella: May you too have a peaceful and happy New Year Bruce
Korel Laloix: ciao
arabella Ella: appearance wise Brian
arabella Ella: but without blub who i missed tonigt
Brian Roop: oh yea, what became of blub?
arabella Ella: Blub comes and goes
arabella Ella: and sometimes Bruce gets him to be more friendly to some of us
Brian Roop: well i need to go
Brian Roop: happy new year all
arabella Ella: bye Brian Happy New Year!
Thor Lumet: Happy new year Brian
Mickorod Renard: bye Brain
Mickorod Renard: Brian
arabella Ella: gtg bye Mick, Korel
arabella Ella: wish you both a peaceful new year!
Mickorod Renard: bye ara
Mickorod Renard: take care
Mickorod Renard: I must admit, i need to get some bed now
Mickorod Renard: take care Korel HNY