2008.07.26 19:00 - Don't Worry Be Happy

    Table of contents
    No headers

    That evening, Stim was the guardian. He sent me the chat log, and I added the comments below.

    In short succession, Stim, Avastu, Starseed, Doug and Rajah arrive.

    Stim Morane: Hi Avastu
    Avastu Maruti: hello my friend
    Starseed Xue: hello
    doug Sosa: hello avatsu, starseed!
    Stim Morane: Hi Starseed
    Starseed Xue: hello everyone
    doug Sosa: Stim
    Stim Morane: Hi Doug
    Stim Morane: Hi Rajah
    doug Sosa: hi, some hat
    Rajah Yalin: hi all, thanks :p
    Starseed Xue: dont worry
    Starseed Xue: be happy
    doug Sosa: just back from a four mile hike along the cliffs of the pacific, good to sit!
    Rajah Yalin: nice
    Rajah Yalin: does anyone here do scripting?
    Stim Morane: not anymore …
    Stim Morane: What was your thought, Rajah?
    Rajah Yalin: hm, well I don’t know if it is a script error or what, the menu for my cottage doesn’t want to come up
    Rajah Yalin: the privacy window menu I mean
    Stim Morane: hmmm … sorry, I don’t know enough about SL to have an opinion re that.
    Rajah Yalin: thats okay, I have alternative methods if it bothers me enough
    Starseed Xue: Dont worry
    Starseed Xue: Be happy
    Rajah Yalin: :)
    Rajah Yalin: Stim how is the project you and Pema have going on working?
    Stim Morane: Which one? There are so many angles to what we’re supposedly doing …
    Rajah Yalin: lol “supposedly” ?
    Stim Morane: well, yes.
    Stim Morane: We don’t have time for everything …
    Rajah Yalin: ah thought it might be procastination
    Rajah Yalin: that is my problem :/
    Rajah Yalin: hi Pia
    Pia Iger: Hi, You all.
    Starseed Xue: when you wear a frown you bring everybody down
    Starseed Xue: so dont worry
    Starseed Xue: be happy
    Stim Morane: Hi Pia
    Rajah Yalin: hi Caspian
    Caspian Inglewood: rezzing problems
    Rajah Yalin: thats SL
    Stim Morane: Hi Caspian

    With Pia an Caspian, the group has grown to seven. Soon after that, Charlyne drops by.

    Caspian Inglewood: right
    Caspian Inglewood: hi there
    doug Sosa: caspian
    Caspian Inglewood: :)
    Starseed Xue: Dont worry
    Starseed Xue: Be happy
    Stim Morane: I am content to “just sit” … but if anyone wants to discuss something, that’s fine too.
    Rajah Yalin: hi Charlyne
    Rajah Yalin: well….
    Rajah Yalin: we could discuss PaB
    Stim Morane: OK
    Starseed Xue: id like to know more
    Caspian Inglewood gave you Kannon Zen Temple, Samurai Japan (206, 107, 51).
    Rajah Yalin: about what?
    Starseed Xue: PaB
    doug Sosa: hello charlyne
    Charlyne Benoir: hello
    Caspian Inglewood: hey Charlyne
    Stim Morane: What have you learned about it so far, Starseed?
    Charlyne Benoir: maybe it’s no region for me
    Stim Morane: Hi Charlyne
    Starseed Xue: all i know is the basics
    Charlyne Benoir: i’m an escort
    Rajah Yalin: you are welcome here
    Stim Morane: up to you …
    Starseed Xue: 9 seconds of meditation every 15 minutes
    Stim Morane: Yes
    Stim Morane: Have you had a chance yet to try that?
    Starseed Xue: yeah
    Caspian Inglewood: that is funny idea
    Charlyne Benoir: i go…bye
    Stim Morane: Bye!
    Stim Morane: Being funny is not such a bad thing.

    Exit Charlyne, enter Adelene.

    Rajah Yalin: the idea is to get a lot of meditation daily through it.. thats all there is to know, the rest comes to you
    Caspian Inglewood: why not 15 minutes of meditation every 9 seconds?
    Adelene Dawner: hmm.
    Rajah Yalin: hi Adelene
    Pia Iger: Hi, Adelene,
    Starseed Xue: i try to meditate as often as possible
    Caspian Inglewood: lol
    Rajah Yalin: might have no time for SL that way caspian
    Stim Morane: Yes, Caspian … that would be better. No meditation at all would be even better. But that is perhaps another story.
    Adelene Dawner: Large group, half braindead here, bad idea, see you tomorrow maybe.
    Caspian Inglewood: hey Adelene
    doug Sosa: adelene come sit.
    Rajah Yalin: haf braindead?
    Starseed Xue: i was at a family bbq tonight
    Starseed Xue: and i realized i was the least stressed there
    Starseed Xue: and thats because i meditate
    Stim Morane: Interesting.
    Stim Morane: Why were the others stressed?
    Starseed Xue: well, my brother in law was afraid of his mind
    Stim Morane: I’m sorry.
    Caspian Inglewood: strange statement
    Adelene Dawner: Yes half braindead - processing slow, thoughts-to-words poor, did want to show latter - perhaps interesting to you - but… large group bad.
    doug Sosa: And are there other reasons that contribute to your not being as stressed?
    Starseed Xue: he said “the second i sit still i think bad thoughts”
    Caspian Inglewood: so he should not worry about it
    Rajah Yalin: thats no problem, no thought in meditation
    Caspian Inglewood: thinking comes and goes
    Caspian Inglewood: it is being attached to this coming and going that is the problem
    Starseed Xue: hes a tv addict
    Pia Iger: TV taught him to worry more:)
    Rajah Yalin: I don’t own a TV, luckily
    Starseed Xue: yes
    Starseed Xue: you arent missing anythinig, Rajah
    Caspian Inglewood: clear mind is like the full moon…sometimes clouds will cover it, but behind the moon only shines
    Caspian Inglewood: so people should not worry about clear mind, it is always there
    Rajah Yalin: how come you are half braindead Adelene?
    Adelene Dawner: Lack of sleep / overstimulation. Happens. Not unusual, not scary, will pass. Work may be interesting tomorrow though.
    Caspian Inglewood: maybe tell your brother in law this
    Stim Morane: I hope you feel better soon.
    Adelene Dawner chuckles. “Feel fine. Just brain being itself.”
    Caspian Inglewood: adelene, hope you feel better:)
    Rajah Yalin: sorry to hear that Adelene
    Rajah Yalin: maybe rest will help?
    Caspian Inglewood: sends you some ginkoba

    The discussion turns to “don’t worry, be happy”, and then Neela joins the group.

    Pia Iger: I wonder how much it will work, just tell ppl “don’t worry, be happy”.
    Adelene Dawner: Time will help. Sleep fills time.
    Starseed Xue: bob marley
    Caspian Inglewood: well good luck
    Rajah Yalin: actually I think it’s a Bobby Mcferrin song (and a meher baba poster)
    Caspian Inglewood: don’t worry be happy?
    Caspian Inglewood: bobby mcferrin I think
    Rajah Yalin nods.
    Pia Iger: I feel people have to learn from themselves that “don’t worry, be happy”, instead of being just told so.
    Starseed Xue: true
    Stim Morane: It’s circular … learning and adopting that View feed each other
    Stim Morane: But people are also different, and circumstances necessitate more emphasis on one side or the other.
    Rajah Yalin: hi Neela
    Stim Morane: Hi Neela
    Caspian Inglewood: hey Neela!
    Neela Blaisdale: Hello everyone, sorry to be late
    Starseed Xue: when you worry your face will frown and that will bring everybodyt down
    Pia Iger: not everybody, some people know better than being affected.
    Stim Morane: The issue here is not just a positive affect, a “mood” of happiness.
    Stim Morane: I think few people in this world understand what is beyond moods.
    Stim Morane: Anyway, we could say PaB is about this latter, noncircumstantial kind of “happiness”.
    Stim Morane: Even the word “happiness” refers to happenings, but true joy is not dependent on happenings of one sort or another.

    The conversation then turned more serious, to death and grieving.

    Rajah Yalin: I realised a few years ago after my wife died that it is an arrogant side of me that caused me to go sad, I could trace everything back to my own meanness
    Stim Morane: I don’t know if this is a good thing to ask, but would you be willing to say more, Rajah?
    Rajah Yalin: and since I’ve only went sad once which I can also trace to my own arrogance
    Caspian Inglewood: Raj makes good point I think, even though it is not correct to say in many circles
    Stim Morane: By arrogance, do you mean “self importance”?
    Pia Iger: how do you know it is arrogance?
    Rajah Yalin: the ego, wanting for the self
    Stim Morane: Yes.
    Stim Morane: I agree.
    Caspian Inglewood: exactly right
    Caspian Inglewood: grieving is a #1 selfish act…but, it is also natural
    Stim Morane: a natural response must be respected. It’s the run-on tendency that is linked to self importance
    Caspian Inglewood: we don’t really mourn that they do no exist anymore, even though maybe a little we do
    Caspian Inglewood: we mourn for our own loss
    Stim Morane: Yes
    Stim Morane: And even that involves a heedless attachment to things that we are not, really, in any essential sense.
    Stim Morane: Of course, this is getting into risky territory, as Caspian indicated.
    Neela Blaisdale: I think sometimes one can grieve for things one doesn’t have a personal attachmen tto
    Stim Morane: Absolutely.
    Caspian Inglewood: yes, but is much more rare
    Stim Morane: Grieving can be profound, and not selfish.
    Caspian Inglewood: and not even sure grieving is right word
    Neela Blaisdale: for things that affect all beings
    Caspian Inglewood: perhaps empathize
    Pia Iger: yes, I was thinking about empathy.
    Stim Morane: But this involves a much deeper kind of natural response
    doug Sosa: The thinking mind can know the person died, but the habits don’t yet understand it, so there is tension within because of conflicting beliefs. (dead or still alive).
    Neela Blaisdale: No not empathy,for me that means putting oneself in the others shoes
    Neela Blaisdale: But grief involves a loss
    Caspian Inglewood: the problem is, and it isn’t right to say…but the world does not need or grieving
    Caspian Inglewood: only needs help
    Caspian Inglewood: our*
    Caspian Inglewood: starving child does not want my tears
    Caspian Inglewood: only wants food
    Pia Iger: what is the feeling of wanting to help come from?
    Caspian Inglewood: why does a lion roar?
    Caspian Inglewood: why do dogs bark?
    Caspian Inglewood: every animal understands their job
    Caspian Inglewood: but human beings do not understand
    Rajah Yalin: possibly our attachment to becoming the top animal
    Rajah Yalin: who is “top” of the food chain? humans, apparently
    Stim Morane: there are many possibilitties. But what traditions have called “the true human” can certainly grieve. And this natural response is involved in making helping gestures. They are linked. But “higher grieving”, if I can coin a phrase, is also “empty”. This gets back to some things others of you have said.
    Neela Blaisdale: Yes exactly Stim

    Doug had to leave.

    doug Sosa: i must to dinner. apologies. bye
    Caspian Inglewood: it isn’t about feeling shame for grieving
    Stim Morane: Empty caring and fellow feeling is the essence of direct helping, without indulgence.
    Rajah Yalin: take care Doug
    Caspian Inglewood: it is about realizing its selfish essence
    Stim Morane: Oh, Bye Doug. THanks for joining us.
    Neela Blaisdale: Bye doug
    Stim Morane: Yes, shame is not the issue.
    Caspian Inglewood: so it is not as if we say, “grieving should not occur.”
    Stim Morane: It’s about what is real.
    Caspian Inglewood: no more than saying farting should not
    Caspian Inglewood: lol, try not farting
    Stim Morane: True. The fact that it arises is not an obstruction to the clear mind you mentioned earlier.
    Neela Blaisdale: I must go as well, good night everyone
    Stim Morane: Good night, Neela.
    Pia Iger: nite.
    Caspian Inglewood: yeah, when grieiving you grieve
    Rajah Yalin: take care Neela
    Caspian Inglewood: anyway, I should get back to temple
    Caspian Inglewood: some guests have arrived
    Caspian Inglewood takes a humble bow
    Caspian Inglewood: ty for wonderful evening
    Pia Iger: bye.
    Stim Morane: Thanks for joining us, Caspian.

    After Neela, Caspian left too.

    Stim Morane: This looks like where we started.
    Stim Morane: Except darker.
    Rajah Yalin: hmm
    Rajah Yalin: later?
    Stim Morane: Yes
    Pia Iger: Stim, do you mean that we don’t want to help. or afraid of help, is because we did not see the reality?
    Stim Morane: Sorry, I’d have to scroll back a bit to see what you’re referring to.
    Pia Iger: you said ‘It’s about what is real.’.
    Stim Morane: this was in reference to the “shame” vs “grief” issue
    Stim Morane: And grief can itself be a reaction that isn’t very reality-centered, or it can be a profound expression of reality.
    Stim Morane: anyway, Starseed … do you have PaB “practice’ questions?
    Starseed Xue: not really, no
    Stim Morane: obviously the “practice” here is pretty open … as Rajah indicated
    Stim Morane: That may eventually change.
    Rajah Yalin: how?
    Stim Morane: But if so, it would come from what you participants are finding.
    Stim Morane: Rajah, I’m the last person to have any opinions about that. I’m trying to let the group as a whole determine that.
    Stim Morane: Pia, did you want to follow up on something you raised earlier?
    Pia Iger: yes, I am still not clear why we feel empathy, but still not ready to give help.
    Stim Morane: Oh. Interesting.
    Stim Morane: Do you have any ideas about that?
    Pia Iger: there is disconnection of our sympathetic feeling to our actions. One reason, I would guess it is fear.
    Stim Morane: You often feel this obstruction to direct action yourself?
    Pia Iger: yes, I feel there is obstruction.

    Adelene returned.

    Stim Morane: Hi again, Adelene
    Adelene Dawner: ‘lo
    Adelene Dawner: Brain’s a bit better. I may drop in and out of using full sentences though.
    Stim Morane: Fine
    Rajah Yalin: good to see you again Adelene
    Adelene Dawner: (Actually, now I want to find a way of expressin that without saying ‘better’, which I consider inaccurate.)
    Stim Morane: Yes.
    Stim Morane: So Pia, are you thinking that the resistance you mention is intractable?
    Stim Morane: Or just difficult?
    Pia Iger: very difficult, or perplexing.
    Stim Morane: Adelene, we’re talking about why we sometimes hold back from helping someone
    Pia Iger: another reason I can think of not able to help. can be that I feel myself is very weak.
    Adelene Dawner: Ah. Complicated. Example?
    Stim Morane: Yes, Pia. I hear this one a lot in my classes.
    Pia Iger: I guess this is common.
    Stim Morane: Very common.
    Stim Morane: Do you feel up to giving an example?
    Pia Iger: not at this moment.
    Stim Morane: OK
    Adelene Dawner: Was asking for one, but I can contribute without.
    Stim Morane: I will have to go in a minute, but would encourage the rest of you to stay and continue …
    Adelene Dawner: I often don’t help unless explicitly asked - my view is that it is better for people to … make the choice of having help or not by themselves.
    Stim Morane: Yes.
    Stim Morane: It depends …
    Pia Iger: to me, there are plenty people out there ask for help.
    Rajah Yalin: I will see you all later
    Stim Morane: Time to go. Thank you all for coming. I wish we could chat more, but perhaps another time.
    Avastu Maruti: good bye my friends
    Rajah Yalin: take care all
    Pia Iger: bye. all.
    Stim Morane: Bye Avastu.
    Stim Morane: Bye Rajah and Pia and Adelene …
    Adelene Dawner: ‘night
    Pia Iger: nited.

    Tag page (Edit tags)
    You must login to post a comment.
    Powered by MindTouch Core