2012.04.22 _ 12

Bertram's meditation today, after catching the tail end of our first Equanimity session... struck by the aspirations and dedications of some Buddhist traditions to "liberate an ocean of beings" and the way this parallels with a conversation that comes up here from time to time, re 'no beings', and what equananimousness (how's that for a word) 'looks like'.

Why aspire to no attachment to 'small b beings' and roles/expectations... surely not just to save ourselves from frustration? Simply, it is just the way things are, that there is non attachment/impermanence. Small b 'beings' are free in Being.

Also noticing ways that items in Alfred's 'regrets of the dying' are perhaps addressed by this topic. Non-attachment touches on 'no fear' which inspires full expression.

(glad doing better, Storm) edited 22:18, 22 Apr 2012

Glad things are improving in the Storm household. Getting sick, healing, or not, just the way things are, as Eliza says. I keep running across the idea that everything is working itself out perfectly and it is starting to make more sense to me now. Doesn't mean we will like it.

Taking things easy today. So used to an RL avatar that "just does". Odd when it doesn't! Grateful thanks for all good wishes. :)

Missed the opening Equanimity session. Just wasn't up to it physically. There will be others. Naturally equanimity is something close to my heart. Equanimity is built on loving kindness, sympathetic joy and compassion. Loving kindness and sympathetic joy are built on compassion. It all starts with compassion.

Came across Aryasura today. Don't really know why I haven't before. Just "Ars long vita brevis" I guess. Anyway, in his Jatakamala it says, "Compassion gives birth to all the other virtues just as cooling rain makes the crops grow. When a person is compassionate he has no desire to harm his neighbour, his body, speech and mind are purified, concern for one’s neighbour’s welfare increases and states like kindness, patience, happiness and good reputation grow. Being calm, the compassionate person does not arouse fear in the minds of others, he is trusted like a kinsman, he is not agitated by the passions, and quenched by the waters of compassion, the fire of hatred does not blaze in his heart…Remembering this strive to develop compassion towards others, as if they were yourself or your offspring." So I have this book on order!

I intend to go to the scheduled Karuna-metta meditation in 20 minutes. And then perhaps come back tomorrow. Namaste dear friends.

Edit: Well I made it in 2 hours, rather than in 20 minutes. But I made it. edited 03:42, 23 Apr 2012

short meditation and Tai Chi practice tonight in Living Room avoiding a wet cat followed by Karuna-metta meditation. Hoping it will slowly come to the level of depth I find my standing meditations, perhaps with patience then, in a few years, it will, and with the help of Storm's calming vice :)

Musings: I am troubled by this word perfection and the concept of things working out perfectly.
It implies there is the right way to be and a wrong way. Perfection is a word that measures the merit of something, not a state of being. If we are in a "perfect" state then why do we need to strive to do anything: to be more compassionate, to be more equanamous, loving and joyful?

Inadequate as it is, is-ness or simply abiding seem enough to strive for and maintain. Perfection is for the gods. edited 15:54, 23 Apr 2012

Last night was such a high.
The people were so kind. They said such nice things. Need to just accept it.
We were about to play a song. The man had passed. One of the simplest, easiest, gentlest, bestest persons I had ever met. Another of the best people to every past through your world.
"I" was/am NOT looking for stardom.
Only that everyone should raise their glass to a simple spirit that made us a better world.

"Where I Hide" Ordinary Space, Available Light"

Feeling exceedingly vulnerable on every level today.
Desperate for tenderness.
Able to trust nothing but Nature to provide it.

http://www.hermitdog.com/99-Days/4-23-2012.png

New comment: I noticed today, day 18, when I looked back at this day, it said Day 22 on April 12! I editing the page to say Day 12 on April 22. :)