2011.03.17 01:00 - It's Scarier To Be Still

The Guardian for this meeting was Zen Arado. The comments are by Zen Arado. Present were eggsalad Ormstein, Calvino Rabeni, Lolelia Zabaleta, oO0Oo Resident, Paradise Tennant, Qt Core and myself

Phones and Apple products:

Zen Arado: Hi Sam :)
oO0Oo Resident: Hi Zen!
oO0Oo Resident: ntsy :)
Zen Arado: ntsyt :)
Zen Arado: Hi Qt :)
Qt Core: Hi all
oO0Oo Resident: Hey Qt!
oO0Oo Resident: gtsy
Zen Arado: I just dragged myself straight out of bed
Zen Arado: because of the time change
Qt Core: only a week to go, right ?
Zen Arado: yeh one more week
Qt Core: (to be honest i almost like the 1pm session at 9pm :) )
Zen Arado: so how are you guys?
Zen Arado: yes we get into our little routines
oO0Oo Resident: I feel relaxed, and ntsy both... as I haven't seen much of you in a while
oO0Oo Resident: QT, I have been wondering if you are a Qt programmer
Qt Core: quite good, at home for work
Qt Core: no ;-)
Zen Arado: what is Qt?
Qt Core: nor i'm cute
oO0Oo Resident: OK, just wondered, because NOkia just sold Qt
oO0Oo Resident: and thought it may have affected you
oO0Oo Resident: but no
Qt Core: a famous graphical library (and nokia is selling out Qt as they are focusing on windows for they smartphones... not so smart if they accept windows on them)
oO0Oo Resident: is not cute in the eye of the beholder? ::grins::
Zen Arado: Nokia is falling behind it seems
Qt Core: having hard times switching from phones to smartphones
Zen Arado: yes
Zen Arado: and they don't have a tablet like iPad?
Qt Core: i wonder if they are going to step down and make only phones for people that don't like/need smart ones
Zen Arado: it's funny but I think my iPhone is easier to use than some of the cheaper ones I had
Zen Arado: more intuitive
Zen Arado: tempted to buy an iPad
Qt Core: i'm not yet used to the "smartness" of my galaxy, so i find in like it intrudes in the way i use it, especially when i use it as a phone
Zen Arado: wonder how much I need all these gadgets
Qt Core: but i miss the shell form of my previous nokia, i fear for the screen ... and it was so similar to original trek communicators!
Zen Arado: but you can get a protector strip for the screen?
Qt Core: yes, but still... so exposed
Zen Arado: ;beam me up Scottie'
Zen Arado: :)
Zen Arado: Apple are clever at marketing
eggsalad Ormstein: hi
Zen Arado: Hi Egg :)
eggsalad Ormstein: hi z
Qt Core: hi Egg
eggsalad Ormstein: hi qt
eggsalad Ormstein: no discussion?
Zen Arado: break
eggsalad Ormstein: oops sorry\
Zen Arado: np
oO0Oo Resident: hey Egg :)
Zen Arado: we were discussing Apple's clever inventions
Zen Arado: and their slick marketing
eggsalad Ormstein: it has made me a wealthy man :)
Zen Arado: they change models so often and persuade you to buy the new version
eggsalad Ormstein: hi sam
Zen Arado: how is that egg?
eggsalad Ormstein: in 2001, a friend told me Apple was about to release a music player... and they were gonna sell the music, as well
eggsalad Ormstein: I bought shares at an effective cost of $11 per
Zen Arado: iPod?
eggsalad Ormstein: it's about $330 per share now :)
Zen Arado: great
eggsalad Ormstein: and yet, I own not a single Apple product!
Zen Arado: too expensive
Zen Arado: but like my iPhone
eggsalad Ormstein: not true, just not the sort of devices for which I have any use
Zen Arado: I think their laptops are overpriced
Zen Arado: but well designed I must admit
Qt Core: but soo cool! ;-) (i don't own one)
Zen Arado: I know
Zen Arado: am tempted nevertheless
eggsalad Ormstein: please buy one :)
Zen Arado: :)
Qt Core: to me Apple always had an irritating "we know better" attitude
Zen Arado: and sometimes the people who use them :)

Do we need all these gadgets?

Zen Arado: lots of my friends don't have TV sets
Zen Arado: maybe I don't need one either
Zen Arado: watch very little
Zen Arado: SL is my TV
Zen Arado: and more active
Qt Core: i almost wanted to ditch it a few month ago when we switched to digital, but i'm not alone in the home and others have use for it (i admit i watch it a few hours a week)
Zen Arado: maybe getting addicted to it
oO0Oo Resident: It seems to me that we design gadgets to become ever more powerful in training *us* (humans) to depend on them more, as extensions of our being, and I sense some sort of convergence imbued baton is slowly changing hands in a panoramic background, whereby humans as we have been, will become other and outmoded. And I wonder what our being tells us about this. Do you ever feel tired and instictually weary of conforming to the needs of the iterations of ever more compelling devices? I do.
Zen Arado: ' weary of conforming to the needs of the iterations of ever more compelling devices?'
Zen Arado: exactly Sam
Zen Arado: a blessing and a curse
eggsalad Ormstein: oh, I gave away my last tv years ago
Qt Core: while i like them, maybe from being a programmer i think (hope ?) i'm still in control ;-)
Zen Arado: good for you egg
Zen Arado: good point Qt
Zen Arado: not being slavish to them
oO0Oo Resident: hard to describe
Zen Arado: I think there comes a point where you can spend too much time in SL too
Zen Arado: it really sucks me in
Qt Core: SL, text chatrooms, online RPG
Zen Arado: and the more friends you have the more you want to be here
Qt Core: social sites
eggsalad Ormstein: I just do it because I'm not intelligent enough to come up with a better way to waste time
Qt Core: luckily i have almost no friends ;-)
Zen Arado: I find ppl in SL are usually quite intelligent
Zen Arado: and you have plenty of friends Qt
eggsalad Ormstein: that may be so, perhaps I should have used the word "creative"
Zen Arado: yes and creative too...even more so than intelligence
Qt Core: :)
Zen Arado: SL allows so much creativity
eggsalad Ormstein: but if I was both of those things, I could come up with a better way to kill time
Zen Arado: it's why there are so many artists and musicians, poets here
Zen Arado: yeh maybe egg
Zen Arado: I should spend more time painting in RL
Qt Core: maybe only as here you can't get arrested for disrupting the quiet ;-)
Zen Arado: find SL takes up my afternoons when I used to paint
Zen Arado: painting and writing are lonely occupations
oO0Oo Resident: maybe paying attention to time, gives rise to creativity and intelligence
Zen Arado: and the chat in here is alluring
Zen Arado: yes
Zen Arado: I have to find a balance
Zen Arado: be more disciplined
Qt Core: i'm here in sl almost only for the cha
Qt Core: t
Zen Arado: it's different if you have a full time job where you have to go somewhere
eggsalad Ormstein: me too - I rarely explore anymore
Zen Arado: me too I guess
Zen Arado: though I have sporadic attempts at building
eggsalad Ormstein: I've never built anything

Relationships:

Zen Arado: I have relationhips in here too
Zen Arado: SL isn't very monogamous I find
Zen Arado: when I meet a nice woman I usually find she has teo or three other boyfriends :(
Qt Core: i don't build (or script) and i'm even less interested in sl relationship ;-)
Zen Arado: it can be interesting
oO0Oo Resident: all are relationships of a kind
Qt Core: i even been scolded by sl friends as i didn't noticed girls flirting with me!
Zen Arado: yes true Sam
oO0Oo Resident: tru to the core Qt!
Zen Arado: they can carry into RL too
oO0Oo Resident: *true
oO0Oo Resident: true to yourself that is
Zen Arado: I thought Italian men are very flirtatious :)
Zen Arado: I'm not good at that I think
Zen Arado: but learning ;)
Qt Core: there are many aspect that almost cost me my citizenship: i have wine and coffee and i'm not a soccer fan too ;-)
Qt Core: *hate
oO0Oo Resident: hehe
eggsalad Ormstein: do you have a FIAT, at least?
Qt Core: in the past, but "inherited:

Racial stereotypes:

oO0Oo Resident: these stereotypes go only so far
Zen Arado: yes
Qt Core: but it seems they are getting better in last couple decades
Zen Arado: I'm Irish so I should drink a lot and get into fights
Zen Arado: only partly true :)
Zen Arado: maybe we are all the same underneath
Zen Arado: am finding that and overcomig my racial preudgements
Zen Arado: especially in SL
oO0Oo Resident waves and bids you all well... sorry to leave during th ebreak...RL
Qt Core: bye O
Zen Arado: bye Sam :)
Zen Arado: today is St Patrick's day BTW
eggsalad Ormstein: break out the Jameson's!
Zen Arado: prefer Black Bushmills
Zen Arado: but don't drink whiskey much
eggsalad Ormstein: it appears you've already started drinking! lol
Zen Arado: I went to an Irish pub the other day
Zen Arado: in SL
Zen Arado: called 'the blarney stone'
eggsalad Ormstein: gee, how creative!
Zen Arado: an American woman told me about it
Zen Arado: yeh
eggsalad Ormstein: I thought all pubs were called the (noun) and (noun)
Zen Arado: in England they are
Zen Arado: lots anyway
eggsalad Ormstein: ahh, I do so get confused
Qt Core: how are the rules about smoking in Ireland, while i don't go out often i found it being forbidden a blessing
Zen Arado: it's hard to find Irish pubs where I am
Zen Arado: no smoking ban for years in the South
eggsalad Ormstein: all we got is McMullan's
Zen Arado: publicans lost a lot of money from that
Zen Arado: or so they claim
Zen Arado: but so much healthier for the staff
Loelia Zabaleta: °͜°
eggsalad Ormstein: you can still smoke in pubs here, unless food is served
Zen Arado: Hi Loelia :)
Zen Arado: you can egg?
Loelia Zabaleta: hi sorry i am late our clocks have not changed
eggsalad Ormstein: indeed
eggsalad Ormstein: hi loelia
Zen Arado: where is that if you don't mind telling me?
eggsalad Ormstein: I live in Las Vegas, USA
Loelia Zabaleta: hello Egg
Qt Core: here you have to have specially conditioned rooms to let people smoke inside and most places choose not to have them
Zen Arado: wow you look nice today Loelia :)
Qt Core: Hi Loelia
Loelia Zabaleta: aww thank you °͜°
Loelia Zabaleta blushes
Loelia Zabaleta: Hi QT

Being as a woman:

Zen Arado: I love it when someone compliments my female av
eggsalad Ormstein: pardon me
Loelia Zabaleta: ooh you have a female avi?
Zen Arado: funny I don't care as Zen
Loelia Zabaleta: interesting °͜°
Zen Arado: oh yes
Zen Arado: you haven't met Jan?
Qt Core: are you trying to teach me something Zen ? ;-)
Loelia Zabaleta: not sure .. have I?
Zen Arado: I use her to express my feminine side ;)
Zen Arado: he he Qt
Loelia Zabaleta: so how do you find it ?
Loelia Zabaleta: being a woman ?
Zen Arado: I'm practicing :)
Loelia Zabaleta: °͜°
Zen Arado: interesting how quickly I fall into the role
Zen Arado: I love pirouetting and sulking :)
Zen Arado: showing off
Loelia Zabaleta: lol sulking?
Zen Arado: trying to get attention
Loelia Zabaleta: do you tell men you are man ?
Loelia Zabaleta: oh my
Zen Arado: only kidding Loelia
Zen Arado: yes it's on the profile that I am a hetero male
Qt Core: the only logical reason for trying a female av would be more choice in clothing ;-)
Loelia Zabaleta grins
Zen Arado: I had fun dressing up with another woman and going clubbing together
Loelia Zabaleta: ts interseting i had a male avi but i got bored veryq uickly with him
Loelia Zabaleta: do you feel differences in yourself that you recall in rl?
Zen Arado: hmmmm not really
Zen Arado: it shows me how much we play roles though I think
Zen Arado: and gender is so much from culture
Zen Arado: and yes being a woman can be more interesting
Zen Arado: I worried at first because I enjoyed the role so much
Loelia Zabaleta: °͜°
Loelia Zabaleta: well there is the acting element too
Loelia Zabaleta: perhaps in rl you could act !
Zen Arado: it's good fun to have a dialogue with your av in public
Zen Arado: I don't want to dress in women's clothes in RL
Zen Arado: :)
Zen Arado: I haven't the figure for it anyway
Zen Arado: :)

Roles and culture:

Zen Arado: funny how I mentioned the '
Zen Arado: worse feminine traits
Zen Arado: or supposed ones
Loelia Zabaleta: no no
Loelia Zabaleta: i meant just acting
Zen Arado: should work on the good ones
Loelia Zabaleta: not as a woman necessarily but being someone else
Loelia Zabaleta: another man
Loelia Zabaleta: another character
Zen Arado: yeh
Zen Arado: maybe
Zen Arado: don't know what I am really
Loelia Zabaleta: we get stuck in our own realities perhasp
Zen Arado: true
Loelia Zabaleta: °͜°
Loelia Zabaleta: nor me
Zen Arado: I tried freeing myself by going to places for D/s stuff
Zen Arado: but find it difficult to be a sub
Zen Arado: better to just be whatever and be fluid
Zen Arado: not stuck in any role
Zen Arado: ust use what is appropriate in any given situation
Zen Arado: it's what I think at present anyway
Zen Arado: I notice people starting to talk down to me in RL now
Zen Arado: because I am getting older
Zen Arado: I have older friends who tell me about this
Zen Arado: one is a retired doctor
Zen Arado: and shop assistants tel him to put his 'wee' card into his 'wee' wallet etc
Loelia Zabaleta: oh that is odd
Loelia Zabaleta: lol
Loelia Zabaleta: eugh
Zen Arado: oh yes
Zen Arado: remembers TS Eliot phrase
Zen Arado: 'formulated on a pin'
Zen Arado: funny how they use that word 'wee' to denote condecension in N.Ireland
Loelia Zabaleta: hey calvino °͜°
Zen Arado: Hi Cal :)
Calvino Rabeni: Good evening :)
Zen Arado: condescension?
Qt Core: hi Cal
Zen Arado: we wre just discussing role playing Cal
Zen Arado: and how fluid are the everyday roles we adopt
Zen Arado: can I learn ffrom being a female av in SL?
Zen Arado: I notice how nice it is to receive nice comments
Zen Arado: and need to give them to others
Zen Arado: I come froma a very dour culture
Loelia Zabaleta: yes i think that is a female trait
Zen Arado: yes agree Loelia
Loelia Zabaleta: to want to make ppl feel good about themselves
Loelia Zabaleta: i love to tell my friends they lookd good
Zen Arado: yes and why not?
Loelia Zabaleta: or how happy they make me
Zen Arado: Eliza is so good at that
Loelia Zabaleta: i think its a good thing
Zen Arado: even in England the culture seems more about putting others down
Zen Arado: even if onli in jokes
Calvino Rabeni: I think, I don't play roles - roles play me
Zen Arado: yes Cal
Zen Arado: or we paly to suit ohters sometimes
Zen Arado: unconsciously
Zen Arado: play
Calvino Rabeni: but sometimes I play others' roles
Zen Arado: Americans can be so much more encouraging I think
Calvino Rabeni: and then we trade, by unspoken agreement
Loelia Zabaleta: yes althogugh that can sound gushy to me
Loelia Zabaleta: sometimes
Loelia Zabaleta: or evenfake at its wosrt
Zen Arado: yes good point Loelia
Zen Arado: I wondered if that was jsut my cynicism ;)
Zen Arado: looking form my dour culture
Loelia Zabaleta: lol
Calvino Rabeni: fake it till you make it <-- slogan
Zen Arado: yes Cal
Zen Arado: 'have a nice day'
Calvino Rabeni: Like meditation is faking being calm :)
Zen Arado: yes
Zen Arado: Hi Paradise :)
Qt Core: Hi Paradise
Zen Arado: beautiful feathers!
Zen Arado: my favourite colour
Paradise Tennant: smiles and waves all round .. hiya zen qt .. cal .. loelia :))
Loelia Zabaleta: Hi Paradise °͜°
Zen Arado: mean that too
Qt Core: time to go, bye all and have fun
Zen Arado: bye Qt :)
Paradise Tennant: good nite qt
Zen Arado: maybe I'm getting gushy ;)
Loelia Zabaleta: bye
Loelia Zabaleta: ;0
Paradise Tennant: smiles what was the topic ?

North/South divide:

Zen Arado: Northern English are more like us I think Loelia
Zen Arado: are you from the North?
Loelia Zabaleta: south
Zen Arado: we were talking about playing roles
Paradise Tennant: ahh
Zen Arado: and how we compliment each other more or less depending on culture we come from
Zen Arado: that putting down we do in my culture can be damaging I think
Loelia Zabaleta: yes my rl partner is scottish
Loelia Zabaleta: and he would not want to live there
Calvino Rabeni: Southern USA culture .. seems to me both more complimenting and more violent combined
Paradise Tennant: yes .. being negative can often be destructive
Zen Arado: yes much the same I would guess
Loelia Zabaleta: he says its a meanspirited culture
Zen Arado: yes exactly
Zen Arado: Presbyterians
Zen Arado: shouldn't say that maybe
Zen Arado: but you know what I mean
Calvino Rabeni: and was settled by people from the UK, so might have inherited some culture from there
Calvino Rabeni: compared to northern US cities
Zen Arado: yeh well I think Southern people seem to be more laid back in most countries?
Calvino Rabeni: More violent
Zen Arado: and more easy going
Calvino Rabeni: No
Paradise Tennant: think there is a sunshine factor in the mix ...
Calvino Rabeni: More expressive, both positively and negatively
Zen Arado: though it doesn't work for Queensland in Australia
Paradise Tennant: more sunshine .. more upsiness :)
Paradise Tennant: less sunshine more downsiness :)
Paradise Tennant: smiles
Zen Arado: wrk harder in North?
Zen Arado: yeh see a sunshine connection
Zen Arado: Queensland is sunnier too
Zen Arado: I'm getting hungry
Zen Arado: haven't had breakfast yet because I had to get up earlier
Paradise Tennant: on coffee ..too early to think of food :)
Zen Arado: we do about 2 hours meditation before breakfast at zen retreats
Loelia Zabaleta: sorry phone
Paradise Tennant: are you on a retreat zen?
Zen Arado: no
Zen Arado: I couldn't use laptop at retreats
Paradise Tennant: smiles
Zen Arado: not supposed to read books even
Paradise Tennant: ouch
Zen Arado: well you get more benefit that way
Zen Arado: not much point if you bring your world with you
Zen Arado: trying to get away from all the distractions
Paradise Tennant: such a nice part of the world though .. books
Calvino Rabeni: smiles ... why bring the office on vacation
Zen Arado: yeh
Zen Arado: exactly
Zen Arado: so I'l go make my porridge if you will excuse me
Calvino Rabeni: oats?
Zen Arado: or I'll faint from hunger ;)
Zen Arado: yep
Loelia Zabaleta: see you again Zen
Calvino Rabeni: sounds good
Loelia Zabaleta: °͜°
Paradise Tennant: smiles of course .. enjoy your breakfast .. :)
Zen Arado: Quaker oats
Zen Arado: :)
Zen Arado: bye all and thanks for coming :)
Paradise Tennant: still pitch black here .. am seldom up this early :) kind of a quiet time of day ... most of the world here is still asleep :)
Loelia Zabaleta: nice where are you pardise?
Paradise Tennant: toronto - canada
Paradise Tennant: spring has banished the snow .. and .. there is a promise of .. balmy weather in the air :)

Acceptance:

Paradise Tennant: you were talking the other nite cal about acceptance .. everything being fine as it is . :)
Paradise Tennant: try to hold that thought a least a few times during the day
Paradise Tennant: makes everything so much easier ..
Calvino Rabeni: breathing knows it
Loelia Zabaleta: yes thats a good thoguht to hold
Loelia Zabaleta: i have b een doint that too myself
Loelia Zabaleta: trying to find calm
Paradise Tennant: surrender :) to what is .. to here and now :) .. to life ;)
Calvino Rabeni: I might breath the big waves, the cobble stones, the gravel and the woodgrain, the slight wave of the grasses or the looming storms
Paradise Tennant: yes .. looming storms .. like breathing in energy :)
Loelia Zabaleta: that makes me a feel a little emotional Cal
Loelia Zabaleta: that sentence
Paradise Tennant: vivid imagery ..
Loelia Zabaleta: yes poetic
Calvino Rabeni: I may at some time have breathed in a poet on a fog shrouded mountain
Paradise Tennant: lol
Loelia Zabaleta smiles
Paradise Tennant: I find when you spend more time still ...the words seem to find you . you do not have to really look for them they just show up :)
Paradise Tennant: like little presents from the world
Loelia Zabaleta: sometimes its scarier to be still than it is to keep moving
Calvino Rabeni: watch for them eh Paradise?
Loelia Zabaleta: anyway it was lovely to meet you both °͜°
Loelia Zabaleta: i hope to see you another time
Paradise Tennant: yes and hard to be still sometimes :) and yes I do watch for them . actually expect them .. :) little gifts from the world
Paradise Tennant: smiles a pleasure loelia :)
Loelia Zabaleta: °͜°
Loelia Zabaleta: i will lookf for gifts today too
Loelia Zabaleta: °͜°
Paradise Tennant: smiles
Calvino Rabeni: This wind will blow to where winds rest when they aren't here
Paradise Tennant: thank you :)
Paradise Tennant: my first gift of the day !
Calvino Rabeni: A good early morn to you
Calvino Rabeni: :)
Paradise Tennant: lol
Paradise Tennant: are you going to bed very late .. or getting up very early ?
Paradise Tennant: smiles well .. take care observerm :) namaste :)