2010.11.06 07:00 – let´s talk about sex ...

The Guardian for this meeting was Bertram Jacobus. The comments are by Bertram Jacobus.

Bertram Jacobus: hey alfi ! :-)
Fay Yedmore: hi both ;-)
Bertram Jacobus: lol
Bertram Jacobus: alfred arrived and didn´t answer - very unusual ...
Fay Yedmore: uhm....z
Alfred Kelberry: meep-meep!
Fay Yedmore: maybe a lag in comunication
Bertram Jacobus: ah ! now ! (?)
Bertram Jacobus: strange ...
Fay Yedmore: welcome alfred
Alfred Kelberry: sorry, got a phone call just after logged in
Fay Yedmore: *smiles
Bertram Jacobus: ah ! :-)
Alfred Kelberry: oi, fay :)
Alfred Kelberry: berty :)
Fay Yedmore: is that new oi?
Alfred Kelberry: um, no?
Bertram Jacobus: no it´s alfred´s old oi :o)
Fay Yedmore: i already got an im today with only oi
Fay Yedmore: never heard it before
Alfred Kelberry: it's actually a dutch hello :)
Bertram Jacobus: hehe - so it´s your oi karma getting ripe now dear ... ;-)
Fay Yedmore: ah really
Fay Yedmore: yes :S
Fay Yedmore: hoi
Fay Yedmore: we say in holland
Fay Yedmore: as far as i know
Alfred Kelberry: oi is an optimized version :)
Fay Yedmore: omg
Fay Yedmore: am getting old
Bertram Jacobus: there are oi skins in germany ... may be also in other countries . or there were some ...
Alfred Kelberry: teh intertubz
Bertram Jacobus: no dear : you´r very young and fresh
Fay Yedmore: lolz
Fay Yedmore: feels like am getting old by dont know the new silly words anymore
Bertram Jacobus: you can´t know everything ... nobody does ...
Fay Yedmore: true
Fay Yedmore: pfff thank
Alfred Kelberry: they pop in every day. can't catch them all :)
Fay Yedmore: feels better again lol
Bertram Jacobus: may be it´s a word of some old generations ... (?) :o)
Fay Yedmore: true again alfred
Alfred Kelberry: fay, you do know "mzzl" though? :)
Fay Yedmore: is it like mazzel
Fay Yedmore: de mazzel?
Alfred Kelberry: yea
Fay Yedmore: ah i know but never use it lol
Fay Yedmore: youre from holland alfred?
Alfred Kelberry: no, just have friends there
Fay Yedmore: ah ok
Fay Yedmore: where u from if am aloud to ask
Alfred Kelberry: sl
Fay Yedmore: oh
Alfred Kelberry: i'm also a robobox
Fay Yedmore: never knew that was a place on earth
Fay Yedmore: wow i really am learning lots today
Alfred Kelberry: :)
Bertram Jacobus: ;-)
Alfred Kelberry: nice quiet morning today at pab
Fay Yedmore: here its midday ;-)
Bertram Jacobus: really !? here it´s afternoon and i did already a looot
Fay Yedmore: but i dont live in sl
Fay Yedmore: maybe thats the diffrent
Bertram Jacobus: always differences and common things ...
Fay Yedmore is brb
--BELL--
Bertram Jacobus: heyy bruci ! ;-)
Bruce Mowbray: Hi, Bert, Fay, and Alfred.
Bertram Jacobus: fay is "brb"
Alfred Kelberry: bruce :)
Bertram Jacobus: hehe - for americans morning session ... ;-)
Bruce Mowbray: It's my waking-up potion.
Alfred Kelberry: waking up coffee? :)
Bruce Mowbray: yeppers.
Bruce Mowbray: What the topic today. . . ?
Fay Yedmore is backies
Bruce Mowbray: Welcome back, Fay.
Bertram Jacobus: it´s strange : at my most frequented food discounter i bought twice now milk (for coffe also!) which was sour ... only a bit , but bah - i asked , could have brought it back and get the money back but prefered to buy at another discounter now ...
Bertram Jacobus: wb sweetheart ;-)
Bertram Jacobus: i was already doubting in ma taste abilities ...
Bertram Jacobus: but now - from the other discounter - all fine again ...
Bertram Jacobus: very strange , weird ... hm
Bruce Mowbray: I use this powder that's flavored vanilla -- instead of milk.
Bertram Jacobus: hehe. i see. very american ! :o)
Alfred Kelberry: powder :/
Bertram Jacobus: associates "nose" ...
Bruce Mowbray: yes, I'm afraid so. . . even though the next farm down the road has about twoo hundred cows!
Bruce Mowbray: --- and my very next movie to arrive TODAY from Netflix is "POWDER."
Bruce Mowbray: How about that!?
Alfred Kelberry: *googles*
Bertram Jacobus waits
Bruce Mowbray: Do you folks know about www.imdb.com ?
Alfred Kelberry: oh, that powder
Alfred Kelberry: yep
Bertram Jacobus: no - i take a look at it bruce
Bruce Mowbray: It has a wealth of information about every movie ever made -- in whatever language, etc.
Bruce Mowbray: It's a great resource if you want to see what other movies a particular actor or director, etc. has done.
Alfred Kelberry: i don't like their recent redesign though
Bertram Jacobus: ah. i see
Bruce Mowbray: Here's the listing for the movie I will get today: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0114168/
Bruce Mowbray: Fay, I don't believe we've been properly introduced. I'm Bruce.
Bruce Mowbray: a frequent visitor to these shores.
Fay Yedmore: and am fay hi ;-)
Bruce Mowbray: ;-)
Bruce Mowbray: I love your profile quote, Fay.
Fay Yedmore: aww thanks
Fay Yedmore: its only hard to fullfill all
Bruce Mowbray: sure, I see you loved the movie AVATAR -- me too!
Fay Yedmore: oh yes
Fay Yedmore: i still do
Fay Yedmore: *smiles*
Bruce Mowbray: Did you get the DVD?
Fay Yedmore: no still not
Fay Yedmore: but who knows maybe santa will bring it ;-)
--BELL--
Bruce Mowbray: It's not quite the same as 3D and IMAX -- but . . .
Fay Yedmore: yes bruce ure right
Fay Yedmore: i saw it serveral times on dvd huh bert *winks*
Bruce Mowbray: Here comes Yaku, I think.
Bruce Mowbray: Hi, Yaku!
Yakuzza Lethecus: hey guys
Fay Yedmore: hi yahu
Bertram Jacobus: hy yaku
Yakuzza Lethecus: nice to see you again fey
Yakuzza Lethecus: fay
Fay Yedmore: likewise ;-)
Fay Yedmore: how's life for u yaku?
Yakuzza Lethecus: well, the usual stuff for me on the weekends
Fay Yedmore: oke same here
Yakuzza Lethecus: washing, cleaning
Fay Yedmore: *giggles*
Yakuzza Lethecus: playing a game often
Yakuzza Lethecus: and trying to hear new stuff in secondlife
Yakuzza Lethecus: well, that´s usually why i sit around here relativly quietly
Fay Yedmore: so maybe i have a subject
Bertram Jacobus: that would be cool dear
Fay Yedmore: what is good sex?
Bertram Jacobus: i think i love your topics
Bertram Jacobus: "ha" ! good question ! at least i find that ... hm
Fay Yedmore: is that only with your partner or could that be with all ppl or?
Bruce Mowbray: or perhaps it could be just with yourself.
Fay Yedmore: wow
Bertram Jacobus: it has to do with satisfaction i think ...
Fay Yedmore: bruce
Fay Yedmore: good point
Fay Yedmore: last i was talking with a friend
Bruce Mowbray: indeed, with satisfaction.
Bruce Mowbray listens.
Bertram Jacobus: coming to peace ? ...
Bertram Jacobus: being thrilled ?
Bertram Jacobus: all that may be - many variations - what do YOU think fay ?
Fay Yedmore: and he told that there where not many girls who can give him that satisfaction that he was able to give himself
Fay Yedmore: so you could be right bruce
Fay Yedmore: and when i think of it
Bruce Mowbray: different. . .[uhhh]... strokes for different folks, I guess.
Fay Yedmore: most time ppl come to the highest level by playing with themselfs
Bruce Mowbray: yeppers.
Fay Yedmore: and with a partner its not always to be get
Fay Yedmore: reagth
Fay Yedmore: how u write it
Bertram Jacobus: i don´t think so - may be girls - what would be quite sad, but for boys and men - i think, it´s different ...
Fay Yedmore: when the don't come?
Fay Yedmore: bert?
Fay Yedmore: could that be diff for guys?
Fay Yedmore: then for girls?
Bertram Jacobus: they can be really happy with a partner i meant ...
Bertram Jacobus: yes
Fay Yedmore: true
Fay Yedmore: but u can be very happy with your partner
Fay Yedmore: but less happy with the sex with him/her?
Bruce Mowbray: Very difficult to generalize when it comes to sexual satisfaction. . .
Bertram Jacobus: and may be also important that sex is practised in a good measure / amount : not too much , not too few ...
--BELL--
Bertram Jacobus: and also for not only few people that may be a difficult topic - as i heared for example more in america then in europe (difficult) - or think about the islamic countries (!) ...
Fay Yedmore: your right bert
Bertram Jacobus: so it´s important again not to hurt somebody with that, with "to much openness" (?) ...
Bruce Mowbray: In America there is a two-faced attitude about sexuality...
Bertram Jacobus: hi eliza :-)
Yakuzza Lethecus: hey eliza
Bertram Jacobus: could you say more bruce ? ;-)
Bruce Mowbray: on the one hand, sex is pushed in entertainment, commercials, and talk shows. . .
Bruce Mowbray: but then it is also a source of shame and guilt -- due to our Puritan heritage, I suspect.
Bertram Jacobus: ah - really ? i have impressions that that pushing in europe is even stronger ...
Bruce Mowbray: I say it's important to bring it out into the open and accept the fact that we are sexual beings. . .
Eliza Madrigal: Hi Alf, Bert, Fay (nice to see you again), Bruce, Ya :)
Bruce Mowbray: Too many kids are being hurt seriously because they do not have the necessary knowledge to deal well with their sexuality.
Bruce Mowbray: suicides, etc. Disease, etc.
Fay Yedmore: hi eliza ;-) (same same)
Bruce Mowbray: Hello, Eliza.
Bertram Jacobus: guilt with that topic is a terrible aspect i find ! i assume the churches abuse those mechanisms and are responsible for it (!) ...
Eliza Madrigal: great topic... terrible stories lately... shame and sex and ridicule... heartbreaking :(
Bertram Jacobus: and i agree very much with that what you say bruce ...
Bruce Mowbray: Yes, religions have traditionally shunned the earth godesses - and the material world in general - especially the body, and especially the female body.
Bertram Jacobus: but we should look at the bright sides ... as bruce already started to do - appreciate it very much - and strenghten the solutions , the solvings ! ...
Eliza Madrigal: it is partly the possessing thing...
Bruce Mowbray: In America, it is common to blame catastrophes (like 9/11, or Hurricane Katrina) on persons whose sexuality is not quite the mainstream norm.
Bertram Jacobus: ya. so our task is to become free from that
Bertram Jacobus: whaow
Bertram Jacobus: that´s heavy
Eliza Madrigal: yes, craziness
Bruce Mowbray: "God's punishment" for New York and New Orleans having large gay populations.
Bertram Jacobus: btw : you levitate bruce ... ;-)
Bruce Mowbray: ridiculous -- and DANGEROUS, too.
Bertram Jacobus: thats really very absurd - wouldn´t work in germany - such ideas ...
Bruce Mowbray: mmm. . . that sometimes happens when I get really interested in a topic.
Eliza Madrigal: indeed... dangerous moreso because the conversation is less and less seen as blatantly ridiculous in 'mainstream' I think...
Eliza Madrigal: :)Bruce
Bertram Jacobus: great bruce ! :-)
Bertram Jacobus: so - can we become free from such restrictions ?
Bertram Jacobus: and errors
Bruce Mowbray: Here in America, we had FIVE young people between the ages of 13 and 19 commit suicide within one month. . . because they had been bullied for their sexual orientation - - and those are just the ones that made the news.
Bertram Jacobus: very sad ...
Eliza Madrigal: yes, lots of fear... society ruled by fear...
Eliza Madrigal: and yet....
Bruce Mowbray: because of this, there are many pushing for more acceptance -- less judgment -- less bullying. There are even federal laws against bullying, now.
Eliza Madrigal: yes there is still availability to discuss openly for those who take it
Bertram Jacobus: but i think like always : it´s important to become free and to work on oneself - so ... how free do we feel with those things ...
Bruce Mowbray: but it still happens among teenagers, of course.
Bruce Mowbray: So true, Bert. The only work we ever do is on ourselves -- and teenagers need to be supported as they do that work.
Eliza Madrigal: how to have passion without posession... hmmm
Bertram Jacobus: yes. would be nice to learn to get more natural again ...
Bertram Jacobus: interesting point eliza ! ...
Bertram Jacobus: i think, may be even that can be lived in the wu wei style so to say : like the water flows ...
Bertram Jacobus: lead from conditions ...
Bruce Mowbray: absolutely so, Bert.
Bertram Jacobus: :-)
Fay Yedmore: sorry folks i have to leave just got a phone call :s
Eliza Madrigal: :) I have to go actually... but nice to see you all. Agreed, Bert... "all we are saying"
Fay Yedmore: loves to be here
Eliza Madrigal: Ah, bye Fey :)
Bruce Mowbray: Good talking with you Fay -- Have a fine weekend.
Fay Yedmore: i wish u all a very very nice rest of the day ;-)
Bertram Jacobus: okay dear, fay, thanks for the topic ! ...
Eliza Madrigal: u2, bye for now
Fay Yedmore: *waves*
Bertram Jacobus: bye eliza then, too ...
Yakuzza Lethecus: bye everyone
Bruce Mowbray will look for a cushion that's more comfortable.
--BELL--
Bertram Jacobus: and i take a cofee - brb :-)
Bertram Jacobus: oops - sry ... (back)
Bruce Mowbray: I think that the Internet has produced a revolution in sexual matters that is at least as big as the revolution that birth-control pills produced back in the 70's. Maybe even greater.
Bertram Jacobus: yess !
Bertram Jacobus: i agree and i like your handling and reactions very much always bruce - like to say that "btw" :-)
Bruce Mowbray: The idea of 13-year-olds sending photos of themselves to each other on their cell phones. . . . (!) -- We'd never even imaged such a thing could be done when I was 13.
Bertram Jacobus: i´m happy with that mostly
Bruce Mowbray: thanks, Bert.
Bertram Jacobus: sure not
Bertram Jacobus: so may i ask : do you mostly feel "relaxed" ?
Bruce Mowbray: but that should be a wake-up call for adults --
Bertram Jacobus: hmmm - what should or could we do ?
Bruce Mowbray: Mmmm.... I mostly feel relaxed and accepted here at PaB. I just wrote to Piet this morning and told him that -- and that PaB is the most valuable things I've ever done in SL.
Bruce Mowbray: Well, we could respond AS ADULTS to our children's curiosity about sexuality --
Bertram Jacobus: ah. hm. yes ...
Bruce Mowbray: In other words, rather than shaming them or punishing them. . . we need to be honest and open and forthright with them.
Bertram Jacobus: what would that mean ?
Bertram Jacobus: ah yes. i see. hm ...
Bruce Mowbray: We need to give the information they need to be responsible with their own sexuality. . .
Bertram Jacobus: ah yes. that´s right
Bertram Jacobus: would be good if the schools could teach that
Bruce Mowbray: Just as we would do (hopefully) with alcohol, or driving a car, or any other "adult" activity. (like banking, etc.)
Bertram Jacobus: yes !
Bertram Jacobus: and media competence ! we should also teach
Bruce Mowbray: Many teenagers are apparently using sex as a weapon against each other. . .
Bertram Jacobus: weapon ? how can one do that ?
Bruce Mowbray: If we as adults gave them a fuller appreciation of sexual energies and behaviors, then that would not happen, I think.
Bruce Mowbray: They beat each other up (both physically and emotionally) over sexual issues. Accusing each other of being "faggots," etc.
Bruce Mowbray: There is no greater insult (in America, anyway) that for an adolescent boy to be called a faggot.
Bertram Jacobus: ah. i see. strange ...
Bruce Mowbray: and the kids know that and use that against each other.
Bruce Mowbray: and suicides result.
Bertram Jacobus: may be the situation in europe is a bit different -
Bruce Mowbray: I do hope so!
Bertram Jacobus: i think, what the so called peer groups especially for youngsters do was always quite similar
Bertram Jacobus: there are group orientations and things one "has to do" to be accepted in the groups - only the topics change ...
Bruce Mowbray: In the Middle East (Iran, Saudi Arabia, etc.) there are actually government-cupported death squads that seek out and execute teenaged gay kids. . . and then hang them publically.
Bruce Mowbray: This is simply barbarism. . . but it is given world-wide attention. To me, it seems like a crime against humanity.
Bruce Mowbray: supported*
Bertram Jacobus: sure. i live in the german gay capital - cologne . so we here have no problems with such or at least very very few ...
Bruce Mowbray: Well, thanks for listening to me while I BLASTED OFF my opinions today ;-)
Bertram Jacobus: people are libaral here. not everybody likes it but they think freedom is important
Bertram Jacobus: and as long nobody is offended - would be the expression "so what?!" correct ? ;-)
Bruce Mowbray: To me, freedom is almost of ULTIMATE importance -- and that's one of the reasons I feel a need to be a hermit -- I am FREE to be myself in my hermitage. ;-)
Bruce Mowbray: In America, we are very much a "shaming" culture -- and one could easily see this in the political commercials during last week's election.
Bertram Jacobus: yes bruce . but i think also freedom = enlightenment finally and so ... real freedom covers everything ...
--BELL--
Bruce Mowbray: Really sad sorts of blaming/shaming. . . SO VERY immature, I think.
Bruce Mowbray: Thanks for our talks today, Bert. I must be off to farm chores now.
Bruce Mowbray: May you have a fine weekend.
Bertram Jacobus: sry - i have to leave - must help a friend with my car, transporting something ...
Bruce Mowbray: me too! Be well.
Bertram Jacobus: great - fits - have a nice time bruce ! *wave* and ty ! :-)